Punishments

[Dorkalicious]

Hello all! :D

I searched the forums for a punishment thread, and I didn't really see anything that is what I was looking for. So here: I begin the thread.

I am just wondering about punishments for subs, both male and female. You Dom/mes will have fun with this one, I'm sure =D

This is more just to brainstorm ideas, share ideas with one another. :) Hope it works. Not to mention probably get some juices flowing elsewhere, hehehe.

(These punishments can be anything from r/l relationships or long distance ones :D)

[nightsilver]

Is it the "fun punishment" or the "you've been bad and now you are being punished" type?

[Dorkalicious]

Punishments, period. It can go either way. It's best if you specify though :)

[Logic1]

that definitely depends on the "crime" though.
spankings and cum denial are my 2 favorites to "give"


mmm post 100 :p

[benjala]

we should have a section where subs punishments can be recorded, or where training advice can be given. Some sites have public displays where the training / punishment is viewed. Isn't technology wonderful. There are plenty of male or female subs who grave the humiliation - punishment. Also ther are plenty of doms who would love to see the humiliation - punishment.
With hoods and things the recipiant can remain anonymous if needed.

Mock auctions etc technology has made virtually anything possible, and with the new generation of technology coming on line a lot more personal interaction will be possible for those requiring the thrill of cyber domination knowing they are not alone and will be able to interact.

[gagged_Louise]

benjala: I think that's a bit spread all over the Knowledge Base section - helps to search for words like "deprivation", "Ice play" etc by the search tools - but I know there was some Dom who promised he would record his sub's cries as she was being spanked and then upload them as an mp3 file to rapidshare (his sub had freely accepted to share it).

Other suggestions:

sensory deprivation: a tight hood, ring gag, ear plugs. sub left hooded and tied up for an hour and then made to suck Master's cock through the gag.

the sub, naked or almost naked, cuffs her hands behind her back, kneels and has to eat a turkey sandwich placed in front of her without help of her hands (this would work fine on remote too - thanks hellish!)

nipples pinched and twisted

sub ordered to whip her mound and imagine she is being fucked, and then to write a story or prose piece detailing her fantasy and her thoughts.

(though I'm writing "her", all of these except the last, will work just as fine for male slaves)

[Logic1]

mmm I like your mind Louise ;)

go shop groceries with a rope harness under her clothes. (funfun)
nippleclamps on hard

[MajesticFae]

If the subbie is a computer/forums addict. Ban her from it for a day or so. I'd be saying I was extremely sorry if that happened.

I've often heard that mindless repetitive tasks work well, like doing lines or writing essays.

[lucretia]

My very first punishment (it was for being lippy) was being put in the corner with my hands on my head. I had to use my nose to hold a penny against the wall. After a half hour, that got very tiresome and my desire to be a smart mouth was severely curtailed.

[TomOfSweden]

I have a pretty nasty whip. It's a over sized paddle. That's for bad punishments. She's not into pain, so there's no "nice" punishments.

[Sir_Russell]

One of my harshest punishments is not talking to her barely acknowledging that she is there. Doesn't take long for the tears to start.

[tessa]

One of my harshest punishments is not talking to her barely acknowledging that she is there. Doesn't take long for the tears to start.

Yep. That's a horrid one alright. ~shudders~

[crazy_grrluk]

the worse kind of punishment is no punishment at all...just pure silence.
no eye contact....no acknowlegment .......no communication whatsoever.

I hate it

[Cracked]

A nasty enema.

[pixie_dust]

*nods head*

Have to agree with Sir Russell and tessa. Being completely ignored for any amount of time is absolutely the worst punishment. I've only received it once, and hope to never have to endure that again.

[moptop]

Yes, for not-fun punishment, being ignored is the worst. It really truly should only be used in situations where the sub has been totally out of order (in my opinion, of course).

Any other punishment for not-fun should certainly be something the sub is not going to get any pleasure out of - sometimes, just the dom/me telling them how disappointed they are, how hurt they are, will work very well. That can be dire. Standing in the corner type stuff for misdemeanours is pretty good, too, I think. Boring. Gives you lots of time to think...

Fun punishment - well, mostly, that's going to be pain if you're into pain, isn't it! I had one fun punishment for cumming when I shouldn't have - pair of geisha balls, still don't know how you say that in English, on in the front, one in the back, 2 hours, go about my normal day. Damn! serious turn on (but not enought to cum and knowing there would be no orgasm at the end of it) and nasty pain from the stretched string at the same time.

[~hellish one~]

the sub, naked or almost naked, cuffs her hands behind her back, kneels and has to eat a turkey sandwich placed in front of her without help of her hands (this would work fine on remote too - thanks hellish!)

oh my goodness! ~blushing~ louise!! lol! i'd forgotten all about that!


If the subbie is a computer/forums addict. Ban her from it for a day or so.

Oh god...have had this one done to me before. i thought i was going to die! only i wasn't banned for a day or so...it was for a week or so! then there was the time i banned myself from chat for a week as a punishment. (don't ask lol) i dunno what the hell i was thinking there but after i'd told him about it, there was no backing out. i never would have forgave myself.


One of my harshest punishments is not talking to her barely acknowledging that she is there. Doesn't take long for the tears to start.
you know...i always joke with Woogs about how he could never ignore me...but i know that if he ever wanted to test that theory out as a punishment it would definitely be a good one. it would drive me crazy to not have that contact with him...or especially to see him online and not be able to talk to him....or get texts from him! :( it makes me sad thinking about it!!

the writing lines/essays and corner time are also good effective punishments. also...for me...physical pain can work as a punishment even though i am a masochist because of the intent behind it. spanking for fun? YAY! spanking for punishment? booooooooo! i hate looking at the marks left behind after a punishment spanking. :( not fun reminder. but effective nonetheless...

[Sir_Russell]

Fun punishments I have none. Fun times and wild ways I have more then my share.

[^firefly^]

As far as punishments go...

Ignoring/isolation kills me. Nothing breaks me down faster than knowing I have disappointed him to that point. Whether it's because he needs space/time to think over my punishment, or whether the ignoring/refusing to speak to me/etc. *is* my punishment...it never fails to make me think long and hard about what I've done, and how much I need to improve.

Humiliation works, too. Nothing hurts more than harsh words, applied well. I'm something of a perfectionist, so failing him is never something I want to do. And when I have, getting my nose rubbed in it always embarasses me to the point that I'll never do *that* (whatever "that" was) again.

Boring/repetitive assignments (lines, mundane chores) are much the same, as I absolutely detest them. They work, but less effectively...I have to really try not to mouth off about how much I *hate* writing lines, as it always seems like such a waste of my time. Never fails to hammer a lesson home, though. Repetion leads to accuracy which leads to understanding which leads to improvement, maybe?

I've always had a pretty clear line in my head, about what is punishment and what isn't. Because I enjoy pain, physical punishments (spanking, etc) usually aren't *punishment* to me, but an extension of playtime. ("Have you been a bad girl today?" *giggles* "Oh yes, Master...I've been soooo bad..") That said, there's a big difference to me between a "playful" spanking and a "punishment" spanking. One doesn't necessarily have to hurt more than the other, but it's the attitude in which it's given that counts.

But then, I guess that's it. Attitude is everything, to me. Knowing I'm disappointed him is what makes a punishment a *punishment*, regardless of how it's delivered. But that's just my 2 cents; feel free to disregard them if you disagree.

[Sir_Russell]

Hmmm realized that I seem to have contradicted myself. What I mean is that I don't use punishments unless there is a reason for it that can't be dealt with in any other way. Then it will not be physical or what she may like in play but much harder to make it punishment. This will create a fear of the play level. I remember one of the young Doms that wanted me to mentor him, he told me quite proudly that she had screwed up a task so he had her suck his cock as punishment.

Good lord don't ever do that again I told him. Same basic reason that you don't take play action she loves and make her connect it with punishment is the same that you don't have her do something you love as punishment.

So I don't play at punishment and when given it will hurt her but probably not physically or be something she hates doing anyway

[Can's Peaches]

I think the worst for me is even knowing that he is mad or even a little irritated with me, that kills.

I would hate to be ignored as well. Master has a corner with a chair in it for me, this I would hate, have not had to sit there yet. :)

[Slave Kitty Sivesh]

I think the worst for me is even knowing that he is mad or even a little irritated with me, that kills.

I would hate to be ignored as well.

I also have to agree. Just knowing master is disappointed in me is a killer, but at the same time makes me try harder to please her. Being ignored by master is one of the worst punishments I can think of.

[xadianx]

I would suggest 2 good ways of punishment
1 being completely unaware of you sub thus ignoring them for a certain amount of time
2 Not allowing them to have any sexual encounters with you or solo but better than that not allowing them to orgasm is best =)

[Dorkalicious]

Wow! I'm so happy this has taken off :D

Hmm. Some of these punishments really make me second guess doing something to offend a Dom.

1)Being banned from the forums? Oh God, I couldn't handle that, I'm sorry. Lol.

2)Being ignored? Not to sound out of line, but this punishment better only be used if it's an extreme case if you ask me. I wouldn't be able to handle being ignored, period.... :(

3)Essays. I like this one, because I like to write. Sadly I don't write as much as I used to. I think it would be a good punishment just because it would help with writing skills. It could be an essay or a short story...anything :)


You all have made such wonderful input! Keep it up! :D

[TeddyBearGaySlave]

A really nasty punishment is a chastity belt combined with getting totally ignored no matter what you do.
That is really terrible, at least for me.

btw: im back =)

[crazy_grrluk]

^ wb

I never get "punished" by S1....he has no reason to do so...because i always end up punishing myself before he has a chance to do so lol

go figure.

[Noontide]

Sir Russel, tessa, crazygirluk, do you guys realise that what you're talking about as defined punishment (not acknowledging another person, silence etc) is the standard punsihment that most people mete out to people they're upset with in or out of bdsm play and relationships???? it's something most of us to to the people we love most in our lives - partners, kids, parents, friends .... and not even as a part of play!!!

[Austerus]

The difference is that in vanilla relationships/everyday lives, we are often not as aware of what we are doing or why we are doing it. In a BDSM relationship it can be very effective to let a submissive know that there has been a serious breach of trust or failure to live up to expectations about which you the dom are very disappointed. It's very very useful as a tool used sparingly to drive a lesson home firmly.

By the same token, it's very important to not overdo it, and to not respond to any infraction by being cold/aloof/distant. Being used in a more aware and more purposeful manner actually makes it used less often and for a lower amount of time. Particularly as the sub knows -exactly- why the dom is doing it, and will most likely have learned the lesson very quickly.

[TomOfSweden]

In a BDSM relationship isn't punishments mostly about

1) teaching your slave what's really really really important to you, which should if the slave is the submissive she claims to be, only be done once.

2) the slave needs it, (for her sake and mental sanity) for what ever reason. I'm great at gauging it.

[Hime]

It was only fairly recently that my husband caught on to the difference between "fun punishment" and "serious bizness punishment." Needless to say, my life got harder at that point. ;)

The worst in terms of making me feel really, really bad about what I'd done wrong was being told that I couldn't call him Master until he told me I could. :( Reminding me that serving him is still a privilege.

Obviously it can't be taken too far, but sleep deprivation is also a pretty good incentive to think about what one has done wrong -- not like "no sleep tonight," but like "you have to finish your task before you go to sleep" when the sub is already feeling tired.

[angelic.zest]

grrr i hate punishments, but i guess thats why they're called.."punishment" lol..because we dont liek them, nor do we want them to happen..
recently i had to send my toys *frowns* and will recieve them once i show im a good girl...
another one..acturally as im trying to type this i have to write an essay on "what happens to cunts who are disobedient"..yeah they write essays ...

[gagged_Louise]

grrr i hate punishments...

as im trying to type this i have to write an essay on "what happens to cunts who are disobedient"..yeah they right essays LOL..

You can expect some more punishment for confusing "right" with write ;)

[angelic.zest]

You can expect some more punishment for confusing "right" with write ;)

LOL..im soo confused lou!! ok im going to edit my post LOL..

[gagged_Louise]

Next time you misspell you'll have to listen to the Divine Punishment album by the amazing Diamanda Galas (a really frightening record, howls and strange hymns) I've seen her live with thundering volume and a strobe lights beam that blinked like a nuclear plant..

[Ozme52]

Be sure to write the right essay, it's on the subject of rites.

[fallenstar]

recently i had to send my toys *frowns* and will recieve them once i show im a good girl...

ahh!!! thats so.... that hits a sore spot, most assuredly. i empathize..all your toys sent away.....ugh so Not fun( i know punishment isn't meant to be fun, but still!!!!!!!)

[crazy_grrluk]

was going to reply to this but then I realised I had already answered lmao.

but I will add tho.....
there is nothing worse than the silent treatment. the see through you stares...shudders

[Gr1m'sGirl]

I really dislike having to sit in a corner and think, or write. I can't stand that!

Although I must admit, any form of silent treatment is the worst. Seeing the disappointment in his eyes, or hearing it in his voice.. -shudders-

[Iron_Lynx]

Be sure to write the right essay, it's on the subject of rites.

HaHa... clever.

[sub4utoo]

The worst punishment I have experienced and not only once but few times, is that of being ignored. Both physically and emotionally. I am someone who loves to cuddle and when I can't with the one I am with it hurts.

[Ozme52]

HaHa... clever.


:D

[gagged_Louise]

I don't know if this qualifies as a punishment for not allowing a submissive to serve the cock - it turns out they didn't know each other - but a weird notice it is for sure. Just saw it in the paper:

Penis attack on fast-food joint

A young woman has been sentenced to 80 unit fines (graded to her income) plus damages, for assaulting a man inside a hot dogs joint in Skovde /Sweden/. One night in March the 22-year old lady approached the man, whom she didn't know, and asked him several times if he wanted oral sex. When he declined and turned away, she knelt, pulled down his pants and bit him in his cock. The woman says she can't remember any of this...

:eek:

[dragonstone]

I would like to say thank you for all the wonderful ideas you all have giving me I really like the idea of the silent punishment... I am pretty new at this I only been a dominate for about two and half years now... So , I am looking for suggestion and ideas on how to punishment my sub would be helpful...

I can however tell you from experience you really have to know what your sub likes and doesn't like... For example my sub hates writing lines, essays, ect and the thing she likes [besides making me happy] is to be able to watch her programs....

[Sir_Russell]

A few punishments more,
Having her walk directly behind me with eyes down not allowed to touch me in any way, since a tenet of mine is that she is to walk with me holding my arm, hand or having physical contact with me at all times that we walk in public. That one seems to kill.

Another is too make her wear very old very housewifish clothes that will make her look and feel like a run of the mill nothing instead of a loved sub/slave. It will show her what she doesn't want to be.

These with the others posted here should work but again know what she hates and use those too.

[Wedjat]

Just found this thread and I guess I have a couple of pennies to toss in too. Although I've new to this whole lifestyle (mostly theory for me at the moment : ) Delia's last comment made me think of something that's a pet peeve of mine that sort of applies here, I think. When she said that punishment should not further worsen the situation it reminded me of a recent scene witnessed in a store - where a (very young) father of a very young child smacked the kid on the rump because he was crying! How does hitting an already crying child help the matter? It was all I could do to not say something, and I was too far away at the time. The reason the child was crying? He couldn't keep up with the dad, who was holding his hand and half dragging the poor little guy! Just seems to me that, had the dad been aware that the problem was really that the child couldn't possibly walk as fast - in a diaper and with legs considerably shorter than his - he would have realized how ignorant and unobservant his reaction was, and how totally ineffective. I know this may seem way off topic, but I'm shooting for an analogy here. : )
I do like some of the things the Doms here have said (Thank you Sir Russell, among others )- that one really needs to know the sub and that the punishments don't have to be dire (quite a relief for this newbie, actually! : ) I think the silent treatment would work really well for subs, who, if like me, like to please people as part of their basic nature.

Delia pointed out that public humiliation wouldn't work for everyone too - I know it would probably have me blubbering in the car, but some people might like it. Thanks for listening (reading?)

[annie]

Just found this thread and I guess I have a couple of pennies to toss in too. Although I've new to this whole lifestyle (mostly theory for me at the moment : ) Delia's last comment made me think of something that's a pet peeve of mine that sort of applies here, I think. When she said that punishment should not further worsen the situation it reminded me of a recent scene witnessed in a store - where a (very young) father of a very young child smacked the kid on the rump because he was crying! How does hitting an already crying child help the matter? It was all I could do to not say something, and I was too far away at the time. The reason the child was crying? He couldn't keep up with the dad, who was holding his hand and half dragging the poor little guy! Just seems to me that, had the dad been aware that the problem was really that the child couldn't possibly walk as fast - in a diaper and with legs considerably shorter than his - he would have realized how ignorant and unobservant his reaction was, and how totally ineffective. I know this may seem way off topic, but I'm shooting for an analogy here. : )
I do like some of the things the Doms here have said (Thank you Sir Russell, among others )- that one really needs to know the sub and that the punishments don't have to be dire (quite a relief for this newbie, actually! : ) I think the silent treatment would work really well for subs, who, if like me, like to please people as part of their basic nature.

Delia pointed out that public humiliation wouldn't work for everyone too - I know it would probably have me blubbering in the car, but some people might like it. Thanks for listening (reading?)

OK... I just have to ask... did the dad then say... "stop that crying or I will give you something to cry about?"

Sort of like turning a blank piece of paper over to write your name on the back.... doesn't make a lot of sense.

[Wedjat]

Thanks Annie, no the guy didn't say that, but he may as well have. I could go off on a tangent here, and had to stop myself from doing so : ), but it would be WAY off of the topic of the thread. Thanks for getting what I was trying to get at though.

[Echoes]

I think writing lines or denying access to a computer site/game is a very effective punishment.
Writing lines or an essay makes one think of the what, why, and possible solutions/resolutions.

To ignore me...well that would just slam my self esteem or what self esteem I do have into a cement box and seal it, unless I suppose it was explained in black and white why, how long and there be some reassurance there, but even then I am not sure this would work for me.
Yes it is much like telling someone to stop crying or they will give you something to cry about.

[submissivemark]

This is a subject I can wax eloquently on for a good bit!

As I've stated in a different thread in the forum, my Wife & I are a D/s, DD, (domestic discipline), couple, that are also into S/M. With all this in mind, She has come up with highly effective ways of punishing me when needed. The way we practice the lifestyle there are no "fun" punishments, the fun aspects are taken care of in S/M play.

I am an admitted masochist, so one would think that pain in a punishment would do no or little good in correcting me when I have fallen short. Not true, as my wonderful Wife has found out how to incorporate it wisely.

For example, if She feels that a spanking/paddling/whipping is warranted, She has me lean against the wall, & uses a paddle &/or strap on me. I am also required to count each stroke, thank Her & ask for another, which we don't do in play. The combination of that coupled with the fact that there is no physical contact, (unlike a spanking/paddling done over Her lap), & the fact that it is more severe, completely alters the focus & meaning of it, making it very effective.

Corner time, (sometimes holding a coin against the wall with my nose, as one other poster on here has mentioned is done with them), & writing lines or an essay is always a part of any punishment, physical or not. I can't do an hour in the corner as the other poster can, due to a bad knee, so my Wife limits that to 15 minutes.

If I fail to do an assigned chore or task, (laundry, for example), She will do it & make me watch Her as She does. All the while I'm begging to be allowed to do the work, well up to a point, because if that gets on Her nerves, I am warned I will be punished for that as well. Corner time & writing will be included in this as well, & sometimes a session with the strap or paddle.

Backtalk, whining, or disrespect gets a bar of soap in my mouth, usually while standing/kneeling in the corner, & usually after a session with the paddle or strap.

The silent treatment is also used by Her, in conjunction with other punishments, & is extremely effective.

My Wife's rules are very black & white, easily understood & easy to follow, so unless I do actually break one, I am rarely punished. To ensure I keep my focus, we also have a weekly discipline session which consists of a paddling over Her lap & 15 minutes of corner time every Sunday. Counting strokes, thanking Her & asking for the next is a part of this session as well.

Any of the above punishments, (combined or not), are very effective.


:cool:

[Echoes]

:rose: Damn, I have just been put on CR but I still have to tease myself each night (we have not met yet)
Doh, one week into discussion and talking and I am in trouble already!

I think I might actually be in a whole lot more trouble than CR with this Dominant if we continue connecting the way we are. :rose:

[jeanne]

I think it's really important that the punishment be appropriate to the situation. An infraction that early in a relationship might earn a mild punishment would perhaps merit something more severe as the relationship progresses and I would supposedly know better by then.

I've only been punished twice - and we found out the very first time that disappointing him is one of my biggest fears. That time wasn't even an actual punishment in the end - simply the threat/suggestion, which made me feel horrible about letting Him down - and then when I was extremely upset about the prospect - a simple "I forgive you". That emotional reaction on my part to the realization that I'd let Him down was the meat of the punishment, and it was very effective.

The second time - well, suffice to say that I'll remember to ask for orgasms when I'm told to. I felt terrible when He asked me, in a gentle tone of voice, "How many times did you cum" and I replied "three" and then from Him - "How many times did you ask?" and I realized - two. Writing lines is boring. And publishing them is just plain embarrassing. But it worked. :rolleyes:

My personal goal - never to disappoint Him in any way again. :)

[Ozme52]

:rose: Damn, I have just been put on CR but I still have to tease myself each night (we have not met yet)
Doh, one week into discussion and talking and I am in trouble already!

I think I might actually be in a whole lot more trouble than CR with this Dominant if we continue connecting the way we are. :rose:


What did you do?
Are you sure it's a punishment and not part of your training?

[Ozme52]

I think it's really important that the punishment be appropriate to the situation. An infraction that early in a relationship might earn a mild punishment would perhaps merit something more severe as the relationship progresses and I would supposedly know better by then.

I've only been punished twice - and we found out the very first time that disappointing him is one of my biggest fears. That time wasn't even an actual punishment in the end - simply the threat/suggestion, which made me feel horrible about letting Him down - and then when I was extremely upset about the prospect - a simple "I forgive you". That emotional reaction on my part to the realization that I'd let Him down was the meat of the punishment, and it was very effective.

The second time - well, suffice to say that I'll remember to ask for orgasms when I'm told to. I felt terrible when He asked me, in a gentle tone of voice, "How many times did you cum" and I replied "three" and then from Him - "How many times did you ask?" and I realized - two. Writing lines is boring. And publishing them is just plain embarrassing. But it worked. :rolleyes:

My personal goal - never to disappoint Him in any way again. :)

Wait until he switches it up on you and doesn't let you beg.
Then you only get to cum when he decides to offer it.

wicked eh?

[jeanne]

And so He has - and yes, He is deliciously wicked. :)

[Echoes]

What did you do?
Are you sure it's a punishment and not part of your training?

uhmm very good question Oz, I thought perhaps it was because I climaxed without asking him, yet we had not yet reached this part of the discussion, it was explained the following night in an email that his submissive would ask permission...so

he is training me??