Which one of me ?

[yullie]

So far i prefer myself a sub... but some of the ppl said i can be a switch... well i dunno myself since i'm also new in this lifestyle... in my mind, i can't hurt ppl... but some of my thoughts say maybe i can be a switch, tempted but i erase that thought... so how do i know which i belong to ? sub/switch/domme ?

[funtime37]

personally i think that you can be what ever you want. don't get bogged down in labels. you are what ever you are comfortable with. if you want to call your self a sub and sometimes be the dom then that is ok and should be ok with most people. the words sub dom and switch are used to describe your self to others not to be used by others to type cast you in to one category or another.

[Euryleia]

funtime is exactly right--you are who you are. Don't let others define you.

You should explore some to find out what gets your motor running. That is the only way that you'll be able to get full measure from your sexuality.

Best wishes on the search. Remember, the only rule is that you should be having fun. If you're not, then what's the point.

[Sir_Russell]

I disagree, personally I think you answered your own question. In your mind you are a submissive, anything done to act the Dominant would only be playing. Nothing wrong with that but being true to yourself is better.

[crazy_grrluk]

I have to agree with Russell here as well....you have answered your own question.
Think long, deep and hard about it and you will find that you are submissive through and through. You have this massive desire to serve...not to be served.
Playing top can be fun but you will always slide back to your true self...your submissivness.
good luck with your quest.

cg

[naughtylittleme]

I agree I think you've answered your own question. It is hard to know I myself am somewhat like you and just starting to explore my submissive nature. This is how I KNOW I am submisive though. First off I can't even begin to think of doing something to intentionally hurt my husband. Even THINKING about it makes me uncomfortable. Another thing that makes me believe I am submisive if we are playing even if we are having totally vanilla sex if he asks me what I want to do I get this whole deer in the headlights thing going on. I feel uncomfortable, put on the spot, I literally BLUSH I HATE it. I am always seeking his approval even in stupid stuff like what we are having for dinner he always has the last say. If he says he doesn't care it pisses me off, makes me all anxious feeling. Not something I enjoy. I often find myself doing things even the stupid little things like when I take serious initiative to clean I am thinking to myself Jason will be so happy when he gets home because the house is so clean.

I am sure everyone is different but what helps me know for sure is the fact that being anything but submissive makes me really uncomfortable. Now don't get me wrong I am not a stool pidgeon. I am probably the brattiest snottiest submissive on the planet. If I don't like something in our out of the bedroom I make sure my voice is heard whether he likes it or not.

The bottom line you only have to do what makes YOU happy. If you truly are submissive you will be happy serving your dom/me. You may play top sometimes but I think you will always sway towards the submissive side. Like me you may "fight back" but deep down you will always know your dominant will win and that is the way I want it anyway lol.

Good Luck to you. I agree also with something one of the other posters said. Don't get so wrapped up in a label. Being a Dom, Master, Mistress, Domme, submissive, pet, slave is something different for everyone. Everyone has their own rules and likes and dislikes. Be YOU that is what is most important.

Becky

[yullie]

Thank u all for ur advice and support *hugs all*
It's seems now i know the answer for myself... I am submissive with my own sub personality :) and i will be me :D

[Logic1]

One thing though. Being a Dominant doesn´t mean that we hurt our subs, and especially not intentionally. Not what I put into the word "hurt" anyways.

[naughtylittleme]

Yeah I should clarify that myself I mean hurt in a good way lmao like oh it hurts so good. :) If my Master ever tried to intentionally physically harm me he would find himself with a few less teeth and one less sub. Bedroom spankings are one thing a slap in the face in the midst of an argument is most definately another.

B