What Creed do You live by?

[Selash]

Most of us know of the Dominants Creed and the submissives Creed. Do you have a "Creed"? Something you feel you that you run your life to or strive to follow?

To me The Dominants Creed is a nice guide, but I want to hold Myself to a higher standard. Something of My own law. Nothing specifically written, but just a level of performance and domination that I see that I would like to work at and that My sub deserves...

The Dominant's Creed

Above all else he cherishes his submissive, in the knowledge
that the gift she gives him is the greatest of all.
He is demanding and takes full advantage of the power given
to him, but knows how to share the pleasure that comes
from that precious gift.
He is in control of himself first and foremost,
so that he may control others.
As a stern and demanding Dominant, he can cause his
sub to cry real tears.
As the consummate lover, he will then kiss the tears away,
without ever stepping out of character.
In times of trouble, a Dominant will leave the roles behind,
to be a supportive friend and partner,
never forgetting that this is still a loving relationship
between two caring individuals.
He is quick to understand the differences between
fantasy and responsibility.

He would never ask a submissive to put him before her career,
or family, just to satisfy his own pleasure.
To win his submissive's mind, body and soul, he knows he
must first win her trust.
He will show his submissive humor, kindness, and warmth.
He must also show her that his guidance and tutoring is
knowledgeable and deserving of her attention, that this is a
man she can learn from, and trust his direction.
He is romantic enough to be protective and chivalrous.
When called upon, he will fight for his ladies' honor.
He proves to her that he is someone she can lean on, and depend on.
He is old-fashioned enough to be a bit of a chauvinist,
yet modern enough to respect his lil one.
Quick to point out the differences between them,
he also knows there is no inferiority in those differences.

When it comes time to teach his submissive her lessons of obedience,
he is a strong and unyielding professor.
He will accept no flaw, nothing less than perfection from his student.
Never does he use discipline without good reason.
When he does, it is al always with acknowledgeable and careful hand.

He is a careful guide, with safety always his main concern.
He knows how to use pain to extend the bounds of pleasure.
He is a mentor who can bring her to the edges of her envelope,
and gently show her the inner courage to reach new heights.
He is always open to communication and discussion, always ready
to hear her wants and needs.
He is patient, taking the time to learn her limits, and
knowing that as her trust of him grows, so will they.
He never has to demand ritual behavior by her.
She responds to him out the want of pleasing him.
Compliance comes from the wanting to please,
not the fear of punishment.
He understands the fragile nature of mind and body,
and never violates the trust given to him.

He is secure enough to laugh at himself and
the absurdities of life.
Courageous enough to accept assistance.
Open minded enough to learn new things.
Strong enough to grow.
His tools are mind, body, spirit and soul with a little
help from rope, paddle an blindfold.
He understands that each partner gains most from pleasuring the other.
And both of them know that love is the only binding that truly holds.


The submissive's creed

I Will Not Try To Manipulate my Dominant.
I Will NOT Push.
I Realise That my Actions And Behaviour Reflect Upon
His Skills As A Teacher And A Dominant.
I Will Not Intentionally Embarrass my Dominant.
I Wear The Honour Of Being His submissive
I Take Pride In Who And What I Am And Will Never
Portray myself In A Negative Way.

I Will Keep An Open Mind And Try New Things In An
Attempt To Expand my Limits.
I Will Continue To Grow as a submissive
and as a human being.
I Will Not Allow myself To Be Harmed Or Abused.
By Giving my "Gift Of submission" Only To Those
That Can Responsibly Accept It.
I Know That submissive Does Not Equal "Doormat".

I Will Continue To Educate myself Because A submissives
Safety Is Always A Concern.
I Will Be Respectful To my Fellow submissives.
I Will Help Those New To The Lifestyle Start Out
On The Correct Path.
I Will Be Responsive To my Dominant.
I will Communicate With Complete Honesty...
My needs, Desires, Limits and Experience.
"I Will Not Hide what my Mind And Body Are Feeling"
I Will Not Expect my Dominant To Know my Thoughts Or
Feelings Which I Do Not Share.

I Will Gracefully Accept In The Responsibility Of
A Scene Or Relationship Gone Bad.
I Will Not Place Total Blame On my Dominant If It Is
Not Warranted Nor Will I Trash His Character"
In Front Of Others Just Because I Am Angry Or Jealous.
I Realize That Things May Not Work Out As Planned
And Shall Strive To Put It Behind me And Move On.
I Will Be Respectful To My Dominant Even In Disagreements.
I Realize my Dominant Has my Best Interests At Heart
And
Shall Guide me With The Best Of All Of His Knowledge.

[fallenstar]

i like this very very much... thanks for telling us about it Selash.. it really enlightened me to things.

[Dragon's muse]

Interestingly enough, after spending all of my adult life in this "lifestlyle" (for lack of a better word), i have never felt the need for a creed.

[_ID_]

Creed/Mission Statement either way you look at it, I find it to be stating a goal for those around you to know about. Personally I don't think it does any good to put something like that out there.

I am who I am, and I live how I live. Those that don't approve can go fuck themselves. That's my creed.

[Naomisagoodgirl]

Creed/Mission Statement either way you look at it, I find it to be stating a goal for those around you to know about. Personally I don't think it does any good to put something like that out there.

I am who I am, and I live how I live. Those that don't approve can go fuck themselves. That's my creed.

But having a creed gives a nice summary of who you are and what you stand for, so the rest of us can know whether we should go fuck ourselves or not. Then you don't have people who should go fuck themselves hanging around, because they haven't figured out they don't approve of who you are and how you live, yet.

I live by a simple rule: I put the people I care about first, and I always show them respect.

[Alex Bragi]

Thank you Selash, I enjoyed reading those. :)


But having a creed gives a nice summary of who you are and what you stand for, so the rest of us can know whether we should go fuck ourselves or not. Then you don't have people who should go fuck themselves hanging around, because they haven't figured out they don't approve of who you are and how you live, yet.

[QUOTE]

Brilliant, couldn't have said it better myself!! *rofl*

[QUOTE=Naomisagoodgirl] I live by a simple rule: I put the people I care about first, and I always show them respect.

Good one--very succinct . :)

[blythe spirit]

I live by Apollo Creed.

[_ID_]

But having a creed gives a nice summary of who you are and what you stand for, so the rest of us can know whether we should go fuck ourselves or not. Then you don't have people who should go fuck themselves hanging around, because they haven't figured out they don't approve of who you are and how you live, yet.

I live by a simple rule: I put the people I care about first, and I always show them respect.

If needing a mission statement or creed statement from me is something a person is looking for, they probably don't want to know me anyhow. So if they don't want to get to know me, they can go fuck themselves. Creed statement would then be kind of pointless.

I personally like to talk with someone. To carry on conversation, to enjoy enlightening debates (like we are). I enjoy learning about people, and what makes them tick. Knowing their creed statement doesn't help me as it's a goal, not who they are. I want to know fears, likes, preferences, kinks, hobbies, beliefs and values.

I have found that when a person tells me their creed "I live by honor and dignity" very many times they don't, they just want you to think they do. How they conduct themselves will present it's self as I get to know them.

A creed statement or mission statement is useless to me.

[Isabelle90]

Thank you so much this bit of enlightenment, Selash!! I've actually never heard of either of these creeds. Both of them are wonderful!


I have found that when a person tells me their creed "I live by honor and dignity" very many times they don't, they just want you to think they do. How they conduct themselves will present it's self as I get to know them.

Makes perfect sense to me! The way we live will determine whether or not we achieve our personal goals anyway. My goals have changed throughout my life based on achievements/failures and new wisdom. My goals do not define me, their sole purpose, for me, is to guide me along my chosen path.

[Ozme52]

I live by Apollo Creed.

damn girl, I came this close to googling Apollo's Creed and realized I was gonna be on rocky ground.... :rolleyes:

[newby]

damn girl, I came this close to googling Apollo's Creed and realized I was gonna be on rocky ground.... :rolleyes:

Oz, you are crazy!! You crack me up

[Ozme52]

"The" Dominant's Creed? "The" Submissive's Creed?

Who made them official? LOL

Thanks but no thanks. I live by my own sense of ethics and morale.
Like ID says, talk to me and find out for yourself.

-------------------------------------------------

But ID, I'd put a softer light on it. LOL

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The problem with the creed is that it's like guidelines one might aspire to but can't live by. But even assuming that... there are things on it that limit you to partnering with certain types. For example... (just one or else this will also become tedious.)


He never has to demand ritual behavior by her.

Well, what if that's her kink?

ID, You're 100% right, far better to have the conversations, discover your common interests and explore the overlaps.

No offense to Selash... but there's a place to be poetic... and the creed one lives by isn't it in my opinion.

[Ozme52]

Oz, you are crazy!! You crack me up


:D

[Naomisagoodgirl]

I personally like to talk with someone. To carry on conversation, to enjoy enlightening debates (like we are). I enjoy learning about people, and what makes them tick. Knowing their creed statement doesn't help me as it's a goal, not who they are. I want to know fears, likes, preferences, kinks, hobbies, beliefs and values.

I agree that this is the best (only?) way to really get to know someone. But I thik that a creed can be a good initial screen. For example, when someone tells me that "Really, the only important thing in life is money", I can be farely certain we will never have a close relationship. Or, to quote another real life example "You can either be a prick or a fool, and I'd rather be a prick." I'd rather be the fool; I understand the prick point of view but I don't want them as my friends.

A person's goals for himself says a lot about him.

[Ozme52]

I thik that a creed can be a good initial screen.I think Russell's Hard Limit Questionaire (http://http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/showthread.php?t=9385) for Doms and subs makes a better starting point.

At least you have to give it some thought. These Creeds are all written out and are in someone elses words.

Again, no knock on Selash. If after exploring the lifestyle, you think it's the perfect description of how you conduct yourself... then more power to you. Me, I still prefer to pick, choose, and reframe the ideas to fit my style and personality. I've never been much good at being formulaic.

[Naomisagoodgirl]

At least you have to give it some thought. These Creeds are all written out and are in someone elses words.


This is what I mean. Not something formulaic that someone else wrote, but something you wrote, that captures your philosophy. It might be only an ideal, but it is your ideal, and that says a lot about you.

[Alex Bragi]

Well, I remember, back at school, we had creed. I can’t remember what is was, but I know it was meant to unite us; inspire us, and create goals and boundaries for us to live by as “tomorrow’s adults”.

I think everyone has a creed, even if it’s a creed that states “I don’t believe in creeds”. ;)

Basically, I think if you have the capacity to think and belief in something then, whether you realise it or not, you do have creed.

Sure, it’s generally good live by your own standards but I think, but if you happen to find someone else’s words inspiring (as Selash and many other do) then that’s perfectly fine too. :)

[blythe spirit]

damn girl, I came this close to googling Apollo's Creed and realized I was gonna be on rocky ground.... :rolleyes:

*laughing - that was just tooooooooo clever.

[Alex Bragi]

*laughing - that was just tooooooooo clever.

Well, I just didn't get this, so I had to check it for myself--I googled it. Yes, that was very witty of you, Oz. *gg*

[Ozme52]

Do I have twice the wit your thought I had? ;)

[Alex Bragi]

Do I have twice the wit your thought I had? ;)

*ROFL* Heck no, I always thought you were a (whole) twit.

[Ozme52]

Lol

[Logic1]

I dont need a creed to live by personally.
The words sounds beautiful and all but do we really need one?
I am with ID I think but with softer words ;)

[_ID_]

A creed tells me nothing of a person, except what they aspire to be. I aspire to be rich, I'm not, nor will I ever be. So a creed that would tell you I aspire to be rich is useless in telling you about me.

If your creed is to live by honesty, and your a pathological lier, then your creed means nothing. See where I am going with this?

You want to know about a person, observe them from afar, file the information you gather by observing, then approach, start a conversation and see if the words that come out of their mouth align with what you observed.

Too many times people will profess they are one thing, when their actions will prove otherwise. Pay attention, and their creed will mean nothing to you.

[thrall]

A creed tells me nothing of a person, except what they aspire to be. I aspire to be rich, I'm not, nor will I ever be. So a creed that would tell you I aspire to be rich is useless in telling you about me.

If your creed is to live by honesty, and your a pathological lier, then your creed means nothing. See where I am going with this?

You want to know about a person, observe them from afar, file the information you gather by observing, then approach, start a conversation and see if the words that come out of their mouth align with what you observed.

Too many times people will profess they are one thing, when their actions will prove otherwise. Pay attention, and their creed will mean nothing to you.

And that is why i think your wonderful ID!!!! you pay attention........

[Alex Bragi]

A creed tells me nothing of a person, except what they aspire to be. I aspire to be rich, I'm not, nor will I ever be. So a creed that would tell you I aspire to be rich is useless in telling you about me.

If your creed is to live by honesty, and your a pathological lier, then your creed means nothing. See where I am going with this?

You want to know about a person, observe them from afar, file the information you gather by observing, then approach, start a conversation and see if the words that come out of their mouth align with what you observed.

Too many times people will profess they are one thing, when their actions will prove otherwise. Pay attention, and their creed will mean nothing to you.


Yes, I agree, a creed is about what people aspire to be.

For most people, who specifically live by a creed that is, it's simply a personal guide or set of rules that they have chosen for themselves to aspire to live by. A creed, therefor, should never to be interpreted as some kind of rock solid espousal of the ethics or standards of a person.

The word creed actually comes from the Latin credo which means, I believe. Therefor, a creed is to say, I believe ..., not I am....

[Sir_Russell]

Oz we disagree again but maybe not in the way you think.

I have my own creed and it is remarkable close to Selash's but the difference is that I don't use it for anything other then my own inner guidance system. A way to judge my actions before and after.

I spend a lot of time doing what others wonder about but for me it is right and fits with my own creed. When I fail, I am not ashamed by try to learn how to correct that so the next time I will succeed and make myself proud.

That is what a creed is about, in my opinion not to impress anyone but for comfort and direction.

[_ID_]

A creed being a personal internal litmus test is a noble idea, and if it works for you, WAY COOL! For me, my personal internal assessments lay in my values, if creed and values are the same, then I might have a creed.

To some, I suppose creed, values and beliefs might be the same. They are vastly differing in meaning purpose and function for me.

[His_pita]

The only creed we live by in this house concerning our M/s life is, "If it ain't fun don't do it."

[Dragon's muse]

Does "What Dragon wants, Dragon gets," count as a creed?

[Ozme52]

Damned if that doesn't sound familiar... ;)

We just use a different, single syllable, name.

[Moonraker]

Most of us know of the Dominants Creed and the submissives Creed.

Actually I don't know the creed. I guess I ain't a good dominant or missed that chapter in the manual. Perhaps somebody would be kind enough to tell me who the creed author is so I can find it somewhere.

As for me, relationships are by denifinition a personal thing, so to have a creed which is in some way imposed on others ain't for me. That would mean I am following the rules or guidelines set by others. I prefer freestyle and will live outside of the box.

That's not to say anything wrong with Selash's creed. Works for him, great. But in my relationships people know what kind of guy I am by my actions not my words. My woman used to ask me why I never said I loved her or asked her to marry. I answered, "ask me next year". And she did and got the same answer. Now 10 years later she has stopped asking. I remind her now and tell her to look at other couples who said they loved each other and even took wedding vows. I ask "are they together 10 years on?". On my deathbed, should she ask me, I will say "ask me again in the next life" :)