Advice needed

[john_bull]

Hello there

This is my first time on a bdsm site .. and my first thread. I suppose what i have joined this for is really for some advice from yourselfs.

As this is a bdsm site, im sure you's guys will have more expeirece in this field than myself.

I am young lad from the Uk, and am in need of some advice.

I have just finished with my partner...
My problem is, i seem a foot/humilation fetish...I know i had this since the age of 5, but in many ways een problem for myself, as i dont seem to turned on by anything else... My past sex life hasnt been the best due to not having an interest in sex, and when im taking part in sex, i just dont seem to be turned on by sex. I also seem never be able to cum, blowjobs and handjobs do nothing for me, but do at all time remain erect.Mastubation seems to consist of my fetish and nothing else.

I have been told that i do need a circumsition, and wondering if this may improve my sex life in a way...

I suppose i was just wondering if anyone else has the same problems ? any advice would be helpful.

hopefully this doesnt seem to weird, but am stuck in a rut..

Thankyou

J

[albear]

Firstly, hello and welcome! Feel free to wander around, introduce yourself in the new members thread, I'm here all week, try the veal :D

Even though you're young I'm assuming you're over eighteen, because this is an eighteen plus site. (if not, prepare for a flogging boy!)

I just had a couple of thoughts about your dilemma. I can understand your non-interest in sex. Although I'm not fond of feet (I think they're functional and not much else) and I'm not all that keen on humiliation, I sympathise with your feelings about them being all consuming of your sex life. I think that once your desires are being fulfilled, it's easier to enjoy the other aspects of your sex life. It's just that at the moment it's foremost in your mind.

Masturbation consisting of only your fantasies? That's okay! It's a safe way to realise what you're interested in, and masturbating is all about you, so go with it and enjoy.

I think talking to your girlfriend (you said you'd finished, but I didn't know what exactly you'd finished, and I didn't want to assume) about what you like is going to be the most direct way to get out of your rut. I know it's embarassing, but maybe test the waters a little by massaging and kissing her feet (unless she's ticklish, in which case you'll probably get a kick in the face, speaking from personal experience) if she seems okay with it go from there.

I don't think a circumcision will improve your sex drive as such, as I think it's being influenced by what you desire. Maybe it'll feel better though? I have no physiological knowledge about that :p Doesn't seem weird at all, in fact, sounds like great fun for you.

Best wishes and big huggles,
albear

[pagan switch]

I really don't think getting circumsized will help unless there's another good medical reason. It's not going to make you enjoy sex more; if exposing the head feels better, pull the foreskin back, pull downwards along the shaft and tie a string around the base of the penis. That should hold it back if you get it tight (but not too tight!).

A foot fetish is fairly common to male subs from what I hear, but it sounds like you have a real fetish instead of just a few kinks like most. However, that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. Really! :) It's not even all that "weird".

All you need is simply who would enjoy accomodating it. An ad in the personals, online, offline or both, could help you find someone like that. It probably wouldn't be that difficult to find a few prospects, as foot fetishes are pretty common. Many people love to have their feet and toes kissed, sucked and so on.

Hope you find what you're looking for. :) Good luck.

[Dslave]

Sounds like you just need to find the right person that is just as into feet as you are. Nothing wrong with that. I don't believe the circumcision is going to make a huge difference. But, I think a footslave might.

[AndrewBlack]

I hope there is a good reason for your circumcision, there is only one absolute medical indication for that procedure and I would strongly urge you to NOT have any unnecessary medical procedure. I am circumcised, for 'medical' reasons, when I was a baby in fact, so I don't know any different, everything still works fine but I don't think that's where your problem is, is it? I also share your fetish ( or one pretty close ), albeit not quite to the same degree but still pretty intensely, and after a lot of dissatisfactory relationships found that you must bring the subject up with your partner otherwise you will remain unfulfilled. You do have the advantage of having a relationship screening tool though, if your partner can't accept it, they are probably not the right person for you and you can move on. Don't accept anyone telling you that it is 'wrong' and don't try to be 'normalised'. I find a good compromise would be to have sex with your girlfriend while she wears sexy shoes in a position so you can see her feet. As often as possible I dress my sub in high heels for sex. I would sound out future partners quite early on about kinky stuff though, while you may not find a woman who shares your fetish I'm sure you can find one who will indulge it and not think you are a weirdo. Actually, come to think of it, my partner does think I am a weirdo, just neither of us give a shit about it.