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View Full Version : Is this a preference or something else?



voxelectronica
11-15-2008, 08:31 PM
When a Dom and I end our relationship I end up feeling GREAT the next day. I feel like i can do anything and world is my oyster! I run off into the world looking for adventure and what not and look back at times missing the sex.

When a sub and I end our relationship i feel like shit. I feel like I've lost my world and my connection to it. Like I'm lost.

I can talk about the first Dom I had, the connection we shared. I can do it without crying.

I can not talk about my first sub without breaking down into tears, getting drunk, singing some Irish song of sorrow.

Is this a preference or do i just CARE more for my subs than I do my Doms? Do other switches feel the same way?

craven
11-16-2008, 11:50 PM
I honestly think it depends on the connection, it does for me anyway, i have only really ever served one and i know that the connection is very very strong, i feel totally owned i would be very much lost without here so i may well feel worse about losing my Domma than i have say over losing a sub. either way for me i have to really know, trust and respect the other so ending a relationship is going to have its low points and feelings of loss and remorse i am sure.

voxelectronica
11-17-2008, 08:44 PM
I know that this may come as a shock so please, brace yourself.

I've had multiple Doms and subs and this is always the case.

I've also noticed that I don't long to have a Dom. Though I love my time with I don't come home and think "hrmmmm I would totally love a Dom right now". I do think that about subs.

craven
11-18-2008, 12:11 AM
though braced, i did not feel as shocked as perhaps your statement had led me to believe i might perhaps be ..... hmmmmmmm

food for thought indeed you obviously sound like a switch that is very much toward the dominant end of the spectrum, or maybe has yet to find that connection with a dom that changes your perspective.

there could be many ways to explain how you feel, i am at a loss as to why i feel the way i do in relation to people, some i feel dominant to, others submissive, there is no hard and fast rule.

do you think that domming a sub provides you as a individual with something that you need or seek and that as a submissive you dont obtain from your Ds relationships then?

We are all different, which is the true wonder of it all, and the beauty of being able to switch

voxelectronica
11-18-2008, 08:26 PM
Frankly, I'm shocked that you are not shocked!

This does take some more thought. I think you are right though.

thir
11-19-2008, 02:50 PM
When a Dom and I end our relationship I end up feeling GREAT the next day. I feel like i can do anything and world is my oyster! I run off into the world looking for adventure and what not and look back at times missing the sex.

When a sub and I end our relationship i feel like shit. I feel like I've lost my world and my connection to it. Like I'm lost.

...
Is this a preference or do i just CARE more for my subs than I do my Doms? Do other switches feel the same way?

Sounds like a preference to me. After all, many of us are not fifty-fifty powershifters, but do tend to lean to one side or the other.

Maybe your dom side is more profound, and the sub side more playful?