Advice

[Mizar]

I was wondering of the other Dom/mes out there might give me some help. I am a new-ish Dom. I have been into BDSM and the lifestyle for a few years now. But I never had anything but a vanilla relationship since I even found out about BDSM, until now. I currently have my sub, and while I have had different troubles with her, I have managed to correct most of them, to one extent or another, we still work on alot of things.

At the same time though, I was wondering if some out there might give me advice on...anything truly. How to handle certain behaviours she has. How to punish her for things, it is long distance and she still lives with her un-knowing family. I am not quite sure what else, persay, but any advice would be appreciated.

[fetishdj]

If you state actual problems or questions it may be easier...

One thing you can do long distance is decide what she wears from day to day, decide when or how she contacts you, and so on. You can also control her toilet use, food, orgasms and so on. For example, if you allow her a vanilla lover, you can control if she is allowed an orgasm with him/her or not. If she is alone, you can state that she is only allowed to orgasm when she is given permission (and you say how she is to cum as well) and possibly only when online/on the phone to you

A lot of online stuff that works best are writing tasks so maybe get her to keep a journal of her fantasies? You can also get her to perform tasks for you and send you video, photo or audio evidence of it by e-mail. For example, performing some simple self bondage, wearing nipple clamps for a set amount of time, wearing no underwear etc.

[denuseri]

We have a tasking society here just for learning how to make safe, long distance orientated commands /orders etc.

In addition to reading the forums you may wish to give it a try.

And as my owner would say, you may be surprised to find out that your own submissive will be your best teacher when it comes to much of this.

Two way comunication and feedback is essential.