question from newbie

[adera]

i recently watched the movie The Secretary, very heavy on spanking..etc... well i never really thought of myself enjoying this life style but whe i watched the movie i was EXTREMLY aroused & couldn't stop watching it. ever since i cant seem to get it outr of my head..i feel weird talking to my husband about it...esp not knowing what to do.....in past relationships i had partners who enjoyed spanking but nothing major .....any suggestions for me ...or am i just being stupid.....


Adera :eek:

[redEva]

No, you are not being stupid. Some stuff and discoveries hit us when we least expect it. Secretary was … good movie. I personally enjoyed much more Nine 1/2 weeks (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091635/) with Mickey and Kim (yeah … I know it is old movie, so what!)
As for what to do with husband… did he watch the movie with you? If so how did he react? If not would you like to watch it with him?
Browse the forums, check particularly MY BDSM Life (http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/showthread.php?t=1387) section. You are not the first or only person that has this or similar dilemma.
Usual answer – and in whole honest the best advice is talk it over. Is it that simple? Of course not! But…. Well, stick around, and maybe you get some ideas.

[adera]

to answer your questions...he was in the room while i was watching but he was gaming online...But he commeted to me that he had watched before and that it was a " weird movie".. when the spanking parts come on he said ..."i told you it was weird"...but that was all he really said about it. the more i think about this the more exicted/anxious i get.....i'm a nympo as it is and as far as i am concerned he doesnt give it up enough( 2-3 x mo)id prefer 2-3x week...& then for him to have this on me yet...That would be torture...Good?? or Bad??? LOL

any extra advise is greatly appreciated.... :D

[redEva]

LOL


2-3 x week - that is not a nympho! .... but sorry to hear you don't get enuff.
not sure what to suggest - seems there is to many distractions - and that cuts on "quality" (fucking) time. to bad he thinks that to be weird, but than ... i guess better than if he thought of it as sick :o

i am sorry not to be giving you tremendous encouragement - but, in my experience - opinion; one either likes it and IS interested or not. the in-betweens are not worth anyone’s time.

[Mobius]

LOL


2-3 x week - that is not a nympho! .... but sorry to hear you don't get enuff.
not sure what to suggest - seems there is to many distractions - and that cuts on "quality" (fucking) time. to bad he thinks that to be weird, but than ... i guess better than if he thought of it as sick :o

i am sorry not to be giving you tremendous encouragement - but, in my experience - opinion; one either likes it and IS interested or not. the in-betweens are not worth anyone’s time.

He may be interested but is afried of what you would think of him if he admited that he found it arousing. Maybe you could drop hints about the movie. Drop a sead and let it germinate.

As for the not getting it anough. Some men find an agressive woman appealing. Why dont you take it. Dont take no for an answer. when he is lying in bed trying to read or what ever, why dont you sink down and give him a blow job but do not let him compleat. When you have his attention so to speak take the lead. And take what you want.

[chromedome11]

I agree with Mobius. Some men hide their feelings because they are concerned about how you would react.

I think you should talk to your husband. Tell him what you told us. I betk you'll be pleasantly surprised with the results of open communication. However, there is one caveat: it could backfire and ruin your relationship. If you're willing to take the risk, open up and see the response. If not, be prepared to live a frustrating life.

[Mobius]

I agree with Mobius. Some men hide their feelings because they are concerned about how you would react.

I think you should talk to your husband. Tell him what you told us. I betk you'll be pleasantly surprised with the results of open communication. However, there is one caveat: it could backfire and ruin your relationship. If you're willing to take the risk, open up and see the response. If not, be prepared to live a frustrating life.

That is why I said drop hints. Let them sink in, Maybe when you are intimate tell him you've been naughty and need a spanking. If he is interested after you had dropped some hints he will take it from there.

If he is totaly flabergasted and has ignored your hints then you can just laff it off as a joke and move on from there. No harm no faul.

[adera]

Just a quick note to update you on my/our progress.... took your advise and sat down & talked with him. started with the movie & went from there....i told him that the movie really excited me......and that i wasn't really sure why, but i wanted to talk to him about it. he was open to the discussion and asked me on what side was i excited...the giver or receiver....and i told him truthfully i wasn't sure...that sometimes when i masturbate i'm the male giving and sometimes I'm the female receiving......

either way not sure what path this is going to take us down but the discussion did give me a good pounding... :D :D :D so i must have sparked an interest and am glad i mentioned it to him.... i know i seem to be asking alot of questions but any advise or helpful links would be greatly appreciated....

And MOBIUS"Don't take no for an answer. when he is lying in bed trying to read or what ever, why don't you sink down and give him a blow job but do not let him compleat. When you have his attention so to speak take the lead. And take what you want."........

I'm going to start to do just that...watch out baby here i come.....

[Lord Douche]

Good luck Adera! Hope things turn out well ;)

On a more business-like tone: Thread moved from General Talk to My BDSM Life
LD