giving up your life/your freedom

[singletaillover]

What are some things that you have given up in your life. and what are some freedoms you have given up to be a Master/slave Dom/submissive relationship? Did you know those things would be taken away when you went into it, or was it an over-time development? One of the questions i am most often asked is how can you not live as an independent person? Doesnt that drive you insane? Dont you want to have your own life? I would reply back saying to them no as i would not have chosen to be in this lifestyle as to become a slave in the first place as i am happy who i am and that is being a slave to my Master to serve, love and obey my Master

[fetishdj]

You give up freedoms no matter what you do, in any situation, and some would argue that any freedom we do have is an illusion - whether restricted by law (no matter how free your society, there are still things you cannot do because the law says you cannot) or by metaphysics (the theories of quantum determinism state that every action you take is determined and unchangeable).

However, if you deny determinism and accept the limits placed on freedom by law (which I am assuming this question is doing) and consider freedom in this limited sense there are some other issues to consider.

1) Legally you cannot have your choices taken away from you. You are no longer bound to a spouse 'til death do you part' and no Master has the right to limit freedom - you always have the choice to walk away. With this in mind, every freedom you lose is lost by choice - you willingly give it up.

2) I mention spouses because I would also add that I do not consider the freedoms you sacrifice in a BDSM relationship to be much different to those you sacrifice in a marriage or long term relationship. There are things I can no longer do because I am married, there are things I have to do now because I am married. I *could* choose to ignore the obligations but my personal sense of duty forbids that.

In most relationships you gravitate to a point of compromise that is acceptable to both sides. If it is not acceptable, you have two choices - adapt or leave. The main difference in BDSM is that one party can set a hard line to negate compromise and the other has to accept that or leave (less chance of adapting). However, during the initial stages of that relationship, there would (or should) have been a lot of negotiation and discussion - more than is usually seen in a vanilla relationship and certainly more formal - that should have negated the need for compromise later in the relationship. And, quite often, the so called 'hard line' is an illusion - the relationship is always adapting and most Dom/mes are open to renegotiation and the best constantly reassess the relationship and adapt where needed.

So, I would argue that you never lose any freedom that you are not willing to give up in the first place and no loss is a permanent loss, no matter what is claimed at the time.

[denuseri]

That was so well done fetish all I can do is clap and press the thanky button! I litterally have nothing to add.

[leah06]

"So, I would argue that you never lose any freedom that you are not willing to give up in the first place and no loss is a permanent loss, no matter what is claimed at the time."

Time. If you make a choice that you later regret, you can never get that time back. Let's be careful out there.

[18yroldbreederslave]

i just know i am so glad to have been born into a life where i learned early what my purpose and natural duty was to men, and they use my body like they r supposed to for their pleasure and breeding. Obviously many cannot be truly free because of our society and i cant even fully tell my story for fear of the laws we have that have tried to prevent me from being trained well and bred the way my body was physically meant to. If you want more candor, it will have to be one-on-one. I just hope evryone is as happy as i always have been. Take care all. bye