invisiblegirl
02-25-2010, 09:27 PM
Hello everyone,
So I am a little nervous writing this post. I have imagined it for a while now but could not find the courage to actually do so.
A little about myself...I am an almost 21 year old female and have had submissive feelings for many years now. However, I have always kept this, along with my BDSM fantasies to myself. I do not feel like I have anyone to confide in who would understand which has left me feeling like there is just something wrong with me.
To be honest, I am probably having some self-esteem issues right now. When I was 16 I became sick and ended up in a wheelchair. While it is uncertain right now if and when I will walk again (which I do plan on doing!), it took its toll on me. I have not had a relationship since, and to be honest any relationships beforehand were not real, but rather puppy love. I chose the name invisiblegirl because that is exactly how I feel sometimes. I am currently a college student, and find that people often see the wheelchair and look right past me without getting to know the real me. I have desires and emotions just like anyone else, and just wish people could see that.
Okay, so now I feel bad whining and complaining about myself in my introduction...it is certainly not the first impression that I want to make, and I hope that in time all of you come to find that I really am a happy and fun person to be around. I just figured I should give an honest backround.
As for why I became interested in BDSM. I like the idea of someone having complete control over me. While I am a very controlling person in many aspects of my life, there are times when I just don't want it. Also becoming sick frightened me at first because I had no control of the situation which I did not like. Although it seems contradictory, I feel like if I could just give the control to someone else at times, then I would not be under pressure or worry that I cannot control the situation. So as you can easily see, control plays a big part in my attraction to the BDSM lifestyle, even though I may find it hard to give up at times
I guess that's enough for now. Don't want to bore anyone with my story. If you do however have any useful advice or information I would really appreciate it.
Take care,
InvisibleGirl
So I am a little nervous writing this post. I have imagined it for a while now but could not find the courage to actually do so.
A little about myself...I am an almost 21 year old female and have had submissive feelings for many years now. However, I have always kept this, along with my BDSM fantasies to myself. I do not feel like I have anyone to confide in who would understand which has left me feeling like there is just something wrong with me.
To be honest, I am probably having some self-esteem issues right now. When I was 16 I became sick and ended up in a wheelchair. While it is uncertain right now if and when I will walk again (which I do plan on doing!), it took its toll on me. I have not had a relationship since, and to be honest any relationships beforehand were not real, but rather puppy love. I chose the name invisiblegirl because that is exactly how I feel sometimes. I am currently a college student, and find that people often see the wheelchair and look right past me without getting to know the real me. I have desires and emotions just like anyone else, and just wish people could see that.
Okay, so now I feel bad whining and complaining about myself in my introduction...it is certainly not the first impression that I want to make, and I hope that in time all of you come to find that I really am a happy and fun person to be around. I just figured I should give an honest backround.
As for why I became interested in BDSM. I like the idea of someone having complete control over me. While I am a very controlling person in many aspects of my life, there are times when I just don't want it. Also becoming sick frightened me at first because I had no control of the situation which I did not like. Although it seems contradictory, I feel like if I could just give the control to someone else at times, then I would not be under pressure or worry that I cannot control the situation. So as you can easily see, control plays a big part in my attraction to the BDSM lifestyle, even though I may find it hard to give up at times
I guess that's enough for now. Don't want to bore anyone with my story. If you do however have any useful advice or information I would really appreciate it.
Take care,
InvisibleGirl