View Full Version : Fisting tips or tricks?
selkie
06-04-2010, 10:55 PM
My Dom is very into fisting and it's not something I've ever done or thought much about until now. The problem is... I'm super tight, I've been told I have the tightest vagina outside of a virgin my partners have ever felt. I've always been this way and even though it causes me a bit of discomfort without some prepping and stretching before sex I'd like to keep it that way :D and occasionally do kegel exercises.
So I'd like some tips on how to prepare myself to get fisted without a great deal of pain, as well as wondering about if this will 'stretch me out' too badly. As far as we've gotten is up to his last knuckles with four fingers but that was using a lot of lube and him wearing a surgical glove to smooth things along.
shyslut
06-04-2010, 11:35 PM
I would say that while you are working up to being fisted to stop kegals. You need to learn to do the opposite open up and relax. But once you do succeed feel free to resume kegals and be assured that you will never be loose.
Fisting should never ever cause pain, maybe a little discomfort but never pain. Just go slow to your goal!!
You've actually made a good deal of progress and its normal to get stuck with the tucking in of the thumb. There is a website fistforum.com that discusses nothing but and will have more tips on hand positioning and positions you can be in.
As for other things you can do to prepare is size play of course! Larger and larger dildos or objects that your in control of so you learn how things feel and how to relax etc.
Good luck!
selkie
06-04-2010, 11:45 PM
My Dom is actually very well endowed and having sex beforehand helps a little bit. I have a lot of trouble relaxing those muscles though, it's always a struggle at the gyno because my brain automatically makes me clamp down. Maybe we'll have to do some sort of relaxation techniques next time to see if that helps!
cadence
06-05-2010, 09:23 AM
Try using a speculum during play at home.
I use one every so often, and it's all a matter of relaxing when it goes and and opens up.
I don't think that it matters on how tight you are, you can be stretched and it's a surprisingly good feeling to have a hand up there.
I've yet to hear of someone who's been "stretched out badly" through this type of play. I would think you'd have to keep a fist up there all of the time for that to happen.
Lots of lube, and a latex glove will help you (unless you have allergies), if you opt out of a glove make sure his fingernails are trimmed and filed, and no hangnails (I've had a jagged fingernail up there, and it isn't very pleasant).
The key component is to relax.
Relax your mind and your body, breathe out deeply through the insertion.
And of course it's all a matter of going slowly and gauging your comfort level by inserting a few fingers at first and then working up to the whole fist.
The vaginal fisting seems pretty easy for me, since after that, I'm going to try anal fisting next.
Jennifer Williams
06-05-2010, 12:42 PM
One thing to point out- the vagina is made to stretch. Think about what it's purpose is biologically- it can fit an entire baby through there! So one little (in comparison to a baby) fist isn't going to bother it all that much.
bbbbadbetty
06-22-2010, 08:26 PM
I stumbled on your post and had to stop. I love, love, love fisting. High-quality lube is essential. Patience on his part is also key - and if he is the pro you say he is, he already knows this. Try playing with your clit as he is working his fingers/hand into you. Your arousal will multiply as you work the clit and you should open more easily to him. A word of caution, however.....once he's in and you orgasm, your cunt will most likely clamp down on his fist and you'll have to be just as patient for the muscles to relax for him to withdraw. During one such session, my partner was trapped inside me for a good 30 minutes....something I didn't mind much at all - lol!
Have fun!
ppr128
06-23-2010, 01:58 PM
If you have a Kink.com account, there is a video of Princess Donna demonstrating her fisting technique on Staci Stax. It may help.
It can be obtained from other venues as well, but you will need to wear an eyepatch and say "yarr!" when watching it if you avail yourself of those.
snowfoxx
10-31-2010, 11:19 PM
I am surprised no one has suggested the book "A Hand in the Bush" by Deborah Addington. It is an excellent and educational book for both the fister and the fistee. I think the biggest thing I would suggest is lots and lots of lube, you can never have too much and also expect it to take a while. Fisting is an exercise in patience, especially the first time. Remember to relax and if it doesn't happen the first time you try, by all means try try again. ~m~
shishagal
11-06-2010, 09:59 AM
im very new to this site (joined yesterday) and new to bdsm but not new to fisting mmmmm i love it
may i suggest( if He will allow) the way i started untill i learned to relax enough automatically
we would start off with foreplay then he would use plenty of lube and have his arm in a way that i could sit on it and slowly lower myself onto him while playing with my own clit strange but it worked as it was at my pace when it got uncomfatable i eased of for a second then went back down worked for me
*lil*minx90*
04-13-2011, 01:27 PM
when I was pregnant with my son I thought the same thing. I asked my ex to fist me to make it less painful. its amazing how much it can stretch. but as long as you continue to do your kegals it should go back to just as tight as before. I've had many guys say i was just as tight as a virgin, and I've had a child. its all in the muscles. try progressivly widing dildos til you can take a 4in with ease. just keep doing your kegals. they will always help tighten things back up. another thing with tightening up would be yoga exercises.