girlfriend help

[glenn720]

hay i am new to BDSM and i have been dating a girl for a while and have fantasized about her becoming my sub however i am to nerves to ask her about it as i fear she will dump me any advice would be grate

[sweetly_wicked]

I think the best first step would be to broach the subject of bdsm with her in a safe and comfortable environment, and measure her reaction to it. If she is not open to it, immediately drop it. It's no good to try and force a lifestyle on somebody. Wait until she brings it up before broaching the subject again. If she does seem to be open to that sort of experimentation, be very polite and ask if she would be willing to try it sometime with you. Always make sure that she is comfortable and not feeling 'weirded out' or nervous. Try switching with her a couple of times, because she may not be a sub, and don't always be intimate with her only in that way. Be sure to keep vanilla sex on the table so she doesn't feel forced to have 'kinky' sex with you. Always make sure she knows she could stop at any time, and, if all goes well, after a few months of experimenting with bdsm, ask her if she is willing to try to take it a step further. Again, if she says no, back off. If she says yes, start communicating with her about how you would like her as a sub. Being easy, slow, and gentle is key throughout the entire process. I hope this helps.

[VaAugusta]

I think it's important to note that most people know what BDSM is. And most likely your girlfriend is aware of its existence as well. But you're going to have to judge her reactions to things, no one on the internet can understand those.. only you. So use some tact and figure it out and bring it about slowly like sweetly_wicked said. Just be aware that she may be bedroom-only. On the plus side, I think that girls generally like a guy who is open-minded to things sexually. :D

[Mistress Fiera]

If it is not in her soul and in her heart to be submissive then what exactly would you be getting? It will mean nothing to you if she does not understand the full impact of your exchange. The vanilla can put on an act, they can try to give you what you want but ultimately they will never understand the mind of someone who was born this way.

[VaAugusta]

Yes, no one knows what they're doing except for you. ..ultimately.