Subspace Regulation

[curiouskiwi]

I'm still pretty new to being a sub but I love it very much. Last week my Master and I discovered a huge thing that would be potentially good for real life play but is bad for online play.

My subspace trigger is having an orgasm...

Mostly this isn't a problem because I can't give myself an orgasm. I just can't it won't happen without another party involved and I had my very first orgasm in May because I was watching someone masturbate and tried using my toy to match them. Basically, for me to even get into orgasming territory there has to be a connection mentally and physically. I need my imagination involved. After a while I start to anticipate what Master may do and will he do it now or later. And since hes my online Master I can reread his words and when NI do the action plays through my head over and over and it pulls reactions from me. I can't control my reaction at all. Its gotten to the point where I'm out in public and if I have a sexual thought cross my mind I sometimes ejaculate a little and I have to go have private time to calm myself down.

The reason for that is, for years reading was my escape from my problems and now I can read things and imagine them to the point where I can actually feel touches on my skin if I think hard enough. Its just something I trained myself to do and now its becoming a problem because of how easily I can go into subspace if my Master commands me to cum for him.

I've learned that when I can feel a "lag" in my vision, movements, and response times that I'm starting to slip into subspace. When I get that laggy feeling if I close my eyes I feel as if I'm sliding outside of myself or my body is tilting when in reality I'm not moving at all.

My Master has taught me that going there by myself is very very dangerous and I can totally understand that. But what I want to know is if any of you has any suggestions on how I can try not to slip into subspace when my Master tells me to cum or says something I really really like.

I just really want to get as much enjoyment out of being with my Master without having him worry if his words or actions will send me a place that he does not wish me to go. So if you can please tell me any of your suggestions.

[ksst]

I'm sorry, I don't understand what you mean by subspace. Is that the orgasm, or is that your mind going to another place, as in out of body experience feeling? Or a very submissive feeling?

[curiouskiwi]

Like I feel my mind slipping into another place. There is a total disconnect to the point where I start to feel everything blurring together and I can't tell the difference between what is really happening and what I think or imagine is happening. That feeling gets worse or becomes stronger with each orgasm I have.

[ksst]

I hope someone has advice for you that has experienced this. Maybe you could do some practice in bringing yourself out of it with a certain cue word? It sounds a bit like self hypnosis.

[curiouskiwi]

Okay..I will suggest this to my master to see if it helps hopefully I get more responses though I am very curious about this...

[Ozme52]

Don't potentially confuse subspace with the fugue you may be experiencing due to the orgasm. They are different, though one can lead to the other and visa versa. It's why the french call the orgasm "the little death".

I'd like to hear input from others if they are able be specific as to the differences. I see them but of course can't describe them from the first person perspective.

[denuseri]

Well first off there are various definitions floating around out there as to what exactly constitutes sub-space.

In older traditions its usually defined as a form of cognitive disassociation that's only brought on by an overwhelming rush of endorphins in combination with very hard and serious real life pain play or repetitive forced orgasms during certain types of muscle tension inducing bondage conditions in which a submissive will tolerate or even appear to enjoy or become completely incoherent from levels of pain that can actually be harmful if taken too far.

In other peoples books its a floaty submissive feeling with little physical ramifications other than some lingering feelings later of perhaps feeling down and appears to be a completely mental phenomena that a little time and re hydration of electrolytes can fix with no problems.

I think the kind of sub-space your referring too and the kind very few people experience in real life are two very different animals and that your not really in all that much danger sitting in front of a computer screen by comparison to the other IMHO.

Here are some links to previous threads where we discussed sub-space for those who are interested:

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/showthread.php/14891-What-is-the-difference-in-subspace-and-orgasmic-space/page2?highlight=space

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/showthread.php/21799-Sub-Space?highlight=subspace

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/showthread.php/721-A-question-of-space?highlight=cognitive

[Xmaster1]

Yes, please describe your mental and physical condition when you are in subspace. That will give us a better frame of reference.
Also, what dangers are you concerned about?