What have you done in training?

[Dog's Lady]

I have seen comments like, "Training is different for every couple/Dom(me)/Sub," quite often on this site. Would anyone, top or bottom, be willing to share some specifics? What exactly did you learn/teach, what kind of (to use my lover/Master's word) "formalities" did you use or learn about? He is telling me that I am trying to floor the gas without having all four wheels on the vehicle, that I haven't trained or learned/used formalities, but when I asked him a year ago to train me, he said he had already started, so I am really confused.
Everyone here has been great, so I am really hoping for some informative answers. Thanks in advance for your time and effort!

[lucy]

Sorry, I've got no idea. I never understood all that training thingy myself and am curious to learn about it.

Basically I believe that I don't need no training, I was raised and educated by my parents, some teachers and a few other people and all in all I think they have done a pretty good job.
I might need teaching and guidance on a few subjects, but training? About what?

[Austerus]

In my experience the term "training" is generally used to describe teaching, practicing, and reinforcing something physical or behavioral rather than an imparting of academic knowledge or wisdom.

Physical training like "training at the boxing gym" or "training for a marathon" can be equally applied to "training to kneel in a pleasing manner" or "training to give head."

Behavioral training is simply the creation and maintainence of desired behaviors and responses through the consistent use of incentives. A person might be trained to always speak in a certain manner, or react immediately to commands in a desired fashion.

Whether training is something you "need" depends entirely on you, your partner, and what you want from one another. It really is different for every couple (or group, shout-out to the polys) because every individual wants and needs different things.

[TopBoard]

I'll leap from the top rung to start it seems... :)

I am quite new to this myself, both the forum and lifestyle. My wife and I had a sort of 'rediscovery' of our sex life this summer, and with our newfound lust we experimented and soon discovered bdsm. It quickly became obvious that she was a sub, and I enjoyed being a top, but I've had to work at being in charge. But, enough of my prehistory (short though it is) as for training: I would imagine training (in a bdsm setting) involves modifying behaviour, both subtly and obviously. For example, I've made a point of spanking my wife every now and then, both alone at home and publicly between shelves in stores and so on. This has made her tense up in anticipation whenever I come up behind her, even though I often don't intend to spank her. We both find this quite arousing with her always expecting a slap, never quite knowing if or when it comes. This also becomes a sort of game where I try to catch her unawares, making it all the more pleasurable when I do...
Another thing I do is tell her I've made some sort of plan for a session in the future (near or distant) and give her hints about what it may or may not involve. This way, I can drop small hints, both actual and false ones, just to gauge her reaction. Seeing her tense up and get goosebumps or hard nipples simply by showing her a lit candle and give her a knowing look is quite a lot of fun...

Hope this helps, and if anyone else has similar ideas, please educate me.