Discussion Group ~ January 24th 2014

[Mrs-Sett {Kuve}]

Our next discussion will be held Friday 24th January 2014 at 9:00 pm EST/ Saturday 02:00 GMT ~ hosted by Miss Sett {Kuve} and guests

Consider the topic, switching’ is it possible to be both dom/me and sub, how does this work or can it work, what is required etc.

I will re-run this on Sunday 26th January 2014 at 19:00 GMT this week if requested by attendance or pm.

We will meet in the chat room lobby and then move to a discussion room.

Anyone wishing to suggest a topic, please reply to this thread ~ we welcome all suggestions and participation.

See you there!!

I know there maybe some concerns that the discussion will be transcribed or copied. This is not the case, it will be summarised only, relevant points indicated for those that cannot make the discussion time. I will endeavor to post weekly, where possible.

There is no password required to enter the discussion room.

Rules of discussion
1. No meeting/greeting each other after the discussion has started, period.
2. Serious replies please, with respect afforded to each other.
3. This is a discussion room, if people wish to chat or play, please return to the lobby.
4. No disrespectful language will be tolerated at all, nor will detrimental comments, each participant has an opinion. There are others present that wish to learn.

[Mrs-Sett {Kuve}]

Summary of discussion group Friday 24th January and repeated Sunday 26th January 2014

One of the main differences of the two discussion groups was the dynamics of those that attended. The Friday group tended toward a question and answer session while the Sunday was more receptive to discussing the validity of switching, no detrimental comments were given on either of the discussions, merely thoughts and opinions considered. Many were interested in how and why the dynamic of ‘switching’ occurred, and whether the consideration of defining yourself as switch would be effected by a general thought that a stigma existed, as seemed apparent or experienced by switches who attended the discussion.

The initial awareness and whether this was possible solely by the couple involved or actually required outside participants was discussed, generally, this was agreed to be subjective and a matter for the individuals involved.. Consider the aspect of seeking professional dominance, giving up that control by being submissive yet retaining a dominant personality, 'can such a one actually submit and how it is possible to switch those roles’ was described. Some illustrated how it was unusual to meet anyone who was totally dominant or submissive with everyone in every situation, certainly given that we all adjust our behaviour according to what is required by circumstance.

The question of a poly relationship was deliberated, that in such a cases one might have one dominant partner and one submissive partner so that all of their needs can be met, or perhaps one of each sex if the person was bisexual. Therefore this would be a consideration, that service topping is different to switching as those who truly determine themselves as dominant would have trouble giving up control. The group described that as the whole aim of service topping’, with a service top the bottom is still dominant and never gives up control. Therefore needs are met accordingly.

The different use of the word control was deliberated; considered as overall control vs specific control, so it could be argued that voluntarily relinquished power has still been relinquished, therefore absent but still present. This seemed an interesting point of thought to many. Hence as example, a sub who was able to describe his/her dom/me stated that ‘when he/her is the I am instructed what to do, when I'm the top he/she tells me what to do to him/her’, in both cases the dom/me was still the dom/me as they both saw it.

The conclusion was that, as with bisexuality, switching is a personal choice and is becoming more generally accepted thought not yet universally.