PDA

View Full Version : Dreams



Cute_Sub24
01-20-2007, 02:29 PM
You just were here
But now nowhere to be seen
As I lay, alone, awake
In the sweeping wake of dream
It had to be real
My heart, it aches
It cuts me deep
I see it was fake
Take me back
To that thought, forever
Instead of this world forlorn
By realities of never
Hope sustains
Hope can kill
We hold slippery dreams
But have to try to grasp them still
That seperate world of possibility
Let that be where I rise
So every time I'm faced with fear
I awake to look in your eyes
I would rather be crazy
If I felt I were next to you
Live in my own perfect world
If only I could see it true
So take me from this state
Of stress and evil schemes
Place me where there is no pain
Place me forever in my dreams

Warbaby1943
01-20-2007, 05:26 PM
Very nice, thanks

TheDeSade
01-20-2007, 05:56 PM
Very nice! . . . interesting composition and an intrguiging scansion. I will say that there are one or two places that it seemed to stumble slightly, but that may be just how I was reading it. It is one that I think I would like to hear the author read to know just how it is to be framed and presented.

Thank you so much for sharing and please let us have more!

Timberwolf
01-21-2007, 12:10 AM
A very interesting first post.

Cute_Sub24
01-22-2007, 07:09 AM
Thanks for all the comments, I appreciate them.

Radiance
01-24-2007, 09:32 AM
very nice post

Cute_Sub24
01-24-2007, 01:24 PM
Thanks Radiance