Question about bondage

[sub17]

After my master ties me up to the bed (wrists), I lose circulation and have lost feeling in some of my fingers. It's been a couple of weeks at least and still nothing. Has anyone faced this, if so, how do I get the feeling back in my fingers. They are numb. (just 3 out of 10)

Many thanks!!

(*oh yeah, the move to Montreal went well, but it's been quite an adjustment*)

[TheDeSade]

Ugh . . not to be an alarmist, but any kind of prolonged numbness or tingling is a good indication of nerve damage and should be tended to by a physician immeditely

[jtkarate01]

I agree with DeSade. I'd get it check out, just to make sure nothing major is wrong.

I Hope all is well,
JT

[Ruby]

* look up and nods *

What TheDeSade said.

Please take care of yourself.

[dynamicbuttler]

*looks up and nods*

What Ruby said.

[His_blizzard]

Ugh . . not to be an alarmist, but any kind of prolonged numbness or tingling is a good indication of nerve damage and should be tended to by a physician immeditely

Yes...good advice. ~blizz~

[cariad]

Ugh . . not to be an alarmist, but any kind of prolonged numbness or tingling is a good indication of nerve damage and should be tended to by a physician immeditely

Agreeing with TDS

cariad

[TomOfSweden]

That's why you should only tie people up if you actually know what you're doing. This should never happen. Not even for a short period.

http://www.blackandblueball.ca/education/BondageSafety.pdf

edit: A hot tip is to buy proper Bondage cuffs, like the one you have in your picture. And only use the ropes on them. Any ape should be able to do that safely.

[Guest 91108]

I hope she read this and is going to be checked
wonders about people really i do.

[Sir_Russell]

I agree go see a Doctor fast.

The risk of prolonged tight bondage is exactly this, so I will take a second here to warn of risks other then rope.

I love leather cuffs, I make them, but even with these there is risk. They can be put on to tight or if put on properly and used for suspension or the chain is pulled to tight this will cut off circulation. Metal cuffs can be as bad as rope, a quick warning with them never buy metal cuffs that don't double lock. The cuff locks when applied and then there is a small lever that allows you to lock it in the tighten positions so that it can't tighten more by acident. The cuff effectively can't loosen because of the first lock and can't tighten due to the second.
Also if it has a quick release lever or 3 links it is a cheap toy not really suited for bondage.

Remember time is a factor in all bounds and a competent Dominate is always checking the color and temperature of the extremeties that are bound even breasts. Way to many pictures out there of purple hands and breast. That color says release right now and massage to get the blood flowing again. To ignore it for very long risks serious damage.

Play but know what the hell your doing please. I suggest that you find out how experienced your Dom is and what level of knowledge he has.

Does he have a knife nearby, within 2 steps the closer the better, to cut the rope in an emergency. Does he check the locks to be sure they are working just before use (side note they like a little graphite from time to time) that is for padlock, cuffs, et al.

We all have to learn a lot to be safe and we all start out not having a clue. Read books like "Screw the Roses Send me the Thorns" don't like this author but he has good check lists in it
SM101"

I have heard some real horror stories about the new craz of using plastic zip lock strips.

[Rhabbi]

I cannot believe that someone would wander around for three weeks with numbness and not worry about it. I had an operation, was told to expect numbness, and yet on my first appointment afterward expressed concern. I agree with Tom that this should never happen.

[master 327-834-200]

This is such a frightening thread. I cannot tell you how much reading and research I did before attempting to tie up my darling slave. Even now I consider us as still learning and I always, always, always err on the side of caution.

I hope lots of people new to the lifestyle read this and consider seriously who they let tie them up.

I really how sub17 you have sought help and let us know you are alright.

[Lee Boudine]

I suggest seeing a chiropractor to treat nerve damage by manipulation and massage.

I have severe nerve damage in my right hand and, while it does not cure it, chiropractic relieves the symptoms. :wave:

[sub17]

Hi ~ I have now moved to be with my Master. We do bondage with ropes, but I've lost feeling in my fingers after we do it. Some of the feelings have come back in many fingers, but two are still numb. It's been about a month.
How do I get the feeling back in my fingers? How can we be more careful -any tips? If I go to the doctor, how do I approach/explain it.
ANY thoughts or ideas would be most welcome.

[Mishka]

Sorry for my lack of experience here...I'm sure the answers to come will probably be more helpful...but I can't help giving two cents.

The first thing I thought of is my dog's collar. (really, the four legged kind) The rule with the collar is you need to be able to fit two fingers underneath it. That way it does not irritate and as he grows, his skin won't grow over it (yuck, and the last part doesn't apply) but...you'd still be secure but not losing feeling.

[cariad]

How do you approach it - very simply by telling him that your b/f / husband / partner had tied your wrists and as a consequence of this you have lost the feelings in some fingers. Believe it or not, doctors have real lives, and whilst yours may well not be a Dom he will be fully aware that many people enjoy simple bondage. He is going to be much more interested in what has happened to your fingers than what happened in your bedroom. Please don't be tempted to make up some alternative explanation, the one thing I have heard doctors laugh about is the 'plausible' explanations for sexual adventures which have gone wrong.

On the subject of being how you play in the immediate future, I would not risk being tied in anyway until your current problem has been investigated - but that may just be me being overly cautious. Instead, why not go for verbal bondage - believe me it can be incredibly powerful. He puts you into the position of his choice and tells you not to move out of it - regardless of what he does to you. (Unless you start feeling numb, in which case normal safety considerations take priority.)

As everyone said in the other thread you started, please do seek medical advice and sooner rather than later.

cariad

[TomOfSweden]

We've allready answered this in the other identical thread you created before. Why not read that again. And get a new master who knows what he's doing.

Make sure BDSM isn't illegal in the country you live before telling your doctor. In Sweden it is illegal and if my girlfriend/slave would be honest the doctor would be bound by law to report me. So lie, but you can do it in a way so as it becomes obvious what it's all about. I'm sure they've seen it all allready. Give them all the details. If you don't they'll be in trouble giving you the correct diagnosis and advice that you need

[cariad]

Make sure BDSM isn't illegal in the country you live before telling your doctor. In Sweden it is illegal and if my girlfriend/slave would be honest the doctor would be bound by law to report me.

That's a good point Tom, which I had not thought of - I guess because it is not illegal in the UK.

cariad

[TomOfSweden]

That's a good point Tom, which I had not thought of - I guess because it is not illegal in the UK.

cariad

Why don't I find it strange that when it comes to sexual violence, UK has the most progressive laws in the world? Such a bunch of pervs out there on that little island of theirs. Loneliness out in the ice cold and silent Atlantic must make them all go a little bit funny.

[cariad]

Well Tom, we were a quiet peace loving gentle nation until those Vikings arrived and taught us a thing or two...

cariad

[TomOfSweden]

Well Tom, we were a quiet peace loving gentle nation until those Vikings arrived and taught us a thing or two...

cariad

Oh, that.........well.....hm.....erm......oh, dear......Well, it doesn't really explain the school uniform thing. I mean, it's not like the Vikings forced their underage vicims to wear a suit and tie. So there.

[sub17]

Thanks for the posts everyone. I had a loss of feeling in most of my hands, but since much of it came back within days, Rhabbi-*why I waited:* I thought maybe that the rest would just take longer - as it's the thumb/knuckle area. Because I just moved here, I don't have a doctor or medi-card as I need to get my driver's licence changed, which is $ - - and on it goes. I will get it looked at this week for sure. My dom and I are both new at this, so I don't blame him too much-Just have to fix the problem.
I don't know if it's illegal here, but there is a very big BDSM scene in Montreal, so maybe a doc will understand.
Tom: My dom suggested that after this problem occured...I agree.
LOL...the UK...they are progressive because they are all repressed...:eek: *kidding*

Thank you all- for your concern, I'll keep you posted.
(I will try a chiro if the doc can't help me)

[TheDeSade]

Sub17, Be honest with the Doc. You aren't going to tell him or her anything they havent heard before. THe Doc cannot diagnose/treat unless they have all the correct information. THe Doc is not going to open the door and announce to everyone that there is a pervert in the exam room, believe me. Most Docs have heard and seen a lot worse than you telling that you and your partner play a little tie me up games and you have a problem.

TDS

[TomOfSweden]

My dom and I are both new at this, so I don't blame him too much-Just have to fix the problem.

Yeah, not checking up on the facts is such a good excuse. I understand now. Who could have thought restricting blood to limbs for a prolonged length of time could be dangerous?

This is about care and love. If you care about someone and love them, you don't want to damage them. The information is out there. Anybody with even a rudimentary skill at google can quickly find all safety advice there is to find. It's not a whole lot to read either. It's just down to taking the time it requires.

Being dominant isn't just an act. By giving herself to the dominant and he accepting it, the dominant becomes responsible for what he does to her. Naturally. She can't be responsible when all she does is obey, can she? Or to put it like this. If he isn't, who is?

I'll stop picking on you now.

[TheDeSade]

Sub17.
Check on line. I think there are several resource lists which have references to scene friendly professionals such as doctors, lawyers and therapists. If you are looking for a Doc, this might be a good step to take before you make an appointment.

TDS

[cariad]

Yeah, not checking up on the facts is such a good excuse. I understand now. Who could have thought restricting blood to limbs for a prolonged length of time could be dangerous?

This is about care and love. If you care about someone and love them, you don't want to damage them. The information is out there. Anybody with even a rudimentary skill at google can quickly find all safety advice there is to find. It's not a whole lot to read either. It's just down to taking the time it requires.

Being dominant isn't just an act. By giving herself to the dominant and he accepting it, the dominant becomes responsible for what he does to her. Naturally. She can't be responsible when all she does is obey, can she? Or to put it like this. If he isn't, who is?

I'll stop picking on you now.

Whilst you are obviously right, I think it can be surprising how what appears to be little more than an extension to a childhood game of tying people up can suddenly become serious.

I suspect there could be a lot of people who will be grateful to sub17 for this salutary warning. Safety comes as second nature to anyone who has been involved with this lifestyle for a while, but to people who are new to it, I can well imagine that in the excitement of everything else, it does not occur to them. That is one of the great things about this place - we can all learn from each other's experiences.

cariad

[sub17]

Tom, I don't feel that you are picking on me. You're just making the point that he should have been more careful, and I should have checked into things beforehand. TheDeSade, thanks for the encouragement, I will be honest with the doctor, you make some good points. Cariad, yes, I keep learning at a break-neck speed it seems - on this site.

My dom was so upset, he never wanted to do bondage again. He was traumatized and wouldn't even consider it when I got most of my feeling back and requested it again. He did it after much discussion and it went better, but I think getting the wrist/ankle straps would be the better choice.

~SUB17:hihi:

[sub17]

Oh, and by the way, I know I wrote a post earlier in the week, but I could not for the life of me find it. So I re-wrote. Sorry for the confusion and thanks for blending the two posts....now...if I could only find it.....

[TomOfSweden]

Up in your left corner you've got "user cp" and then click "subscribed threads" in the left hand menu. Threads you have created you automatically subscribe to an will be listed.

handy

[~hellish one~]

Oh, and by the way, I know I wrote a post earlier in the week, but I could not for the life of me find it. So I re-wrote. Sorry for the confusion and thanks for blending the two posts....now...if I could only find it.....

are you asking where the other thread went to? your first thread and all it's replies were merged into this thread once i saw that there were 2 identical threads. ~smiles~ so all of the posts from that thread are here in this one and the old thread is technically 'gone'.

also (cuz sometimes i have a hard time finding threads too lol) if i'm having trouble i just click on my name there on the left and then click on "Find more posts by baby girl(W)" and it shows me all the posts i've made. :) you can also access that feature from your profile.

[BorderCollie]

Hi Gang,
The thread killer has now stepped up to the plate!

If I may put a suggestion forward, so that circultaion is lost...

My sub and I use velcro leg ropes for BDSM, she's into tight bdsm and the leg ropes are perfect.
Hard/Impossible to get out of, quick release if need be and circulation is maitained.

Yes! We have many sets, spreader bars etc etc etc.:wave:

[sub17]

Thanks for the info re: where my thread went, and how to find it.

Thread Killer?:confused:

[TomOfSweden]

Hi Gang,
The thread killer has now stepped up to the plate!

If I may put a suggestion forward, so that circultaion is lost...

My sub and I use velcro leg ropes for BDSM, she's into tight bdsm and the leg ropes are perfect.
Hard/Impossible to get out of, quick release if need be and circulation is maitained.

Yes! We have many sets, spreader bars etc etc etc.:wave:

he he. I bought a set of those when I was starting my dommy career. It all ended up in us falling on the floor and laughing about it. They're not particularly erotic, are they. There's no exiting smell or feel to them. It was the first and last time I used them. I've still got it all if anybody would like to have it. A complete set with pretty much everything.

[quietkarin]

Just wanted to put another possibility out there (because I always like to look for the simpler solution!). I've had numbing and tingling in my entire right arm for days.... and haven't had the joy of bondage either.

A chiropractor put it right for me - it was simply a misaligned vertebrae in my neck. The numbing/tingling was gone right away.

[Ocean_Soul]

I just have to add this to the thread. My absolute favorite knot to tie limbs is the French Bowline.

http://www.ropefashions.com/fashions2/thumbnails.php?album=26

I wouldn't recommend using anything else unless it produces the same results. It will not tighten when it is pulled on unlike many other knots and it can be made wide so the load is distributed evenly over a wide area.

Recently I have used this knot to tie a cute little thing down using just 1/4" rope and had her squirm very violently through a powerful orgasm without so much as a hint of a bruise. Which even surprised me.

[Rhabbi]

Excellant choice, never slips and gets tighter.