sweetlynaughty

For my Once Controlling Dom

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, 01-19-2014 at 11:36 PM (2386 Views)

I still hear your voice echo in my head
I think of you and us as I lie in bed

Every night my demons sing me a sad lullaby
I try to block them out but they hum until I cry

Your once precious words now fill me with sorrow
I hug myself whimpering your name and hope for a brighter tomorrow

How could I have once been your constant and center
Now my tears fall like raindrops when I read your old letter

Your comforting jokes still make smile
But my pain is still here and it has been for a while

This time there was no email to warn me that you were leaving
Just silence day after day and the lost state of a lonely grieving

I am lost and aimless without your dominance guiding over me
I cannot accept my gift of submission to you was not meant to be

Updated 01-19-2014 at 11:56 PM by sweetlynaughty

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Comments

sweetlynaughty - 01-20-2014 08:33 AM
I agree....I just wish I didn't still feel such strong submissive feelinsg towards James. Our relationship ended back in August but it was so intense and primal; I guess it takes more time when you feel a deeper D/s connection some Doms. This was the same Dom I wrote my Inspection blog about.

*hugs* Thank you for your kind words and support

Originally Posted by just_ine

In my opinion the cruelest and at the same time most cowardly thing someone in a relationship can do to another.

*hugs*
I hope you can overcome this and look out to the 'better' that is coming. xxx
just_ine - 01-20-2014 08:53 AM
I understand those feelings of submissiveness that sometimes stay behind despite being treated badly.

Perhaps ask yourself: would a Dominant worthy of you, not be eager to tie you to Him more and more? Would he hurt you this way....put you through such fear and insecurity if he was really worthy of you?

Not easy questions to ask....i've had to do that myself before. But i hope that you see these questions should be easy to answer. Because you are worth more.
xxx
sweetlynaughty - 01-20-2014 09:28 PM
Excellent questions - easy to answer - painful to face and accept those answers. Thank you just ine!! *hugs you tight*

Originally Posted by just_ine

I understand those feelings of submissiveness that sometimes stay behind despite being treated badly.

Perhaps ask yourself: would a Dominant worthy of you, not be eager to tie you to Him more and more? Would he hurt you this way....put you through such fear and insecurity if he was really worthy of you?

Not easy questions to ask....i've had to do that myself before. But i hope that you see these questions should be easy to answer. Because you are worth more.
xxx