domestic servitude

I have been a switch since my earliest days. My wife likes my submissive side, and does not like my dominant side. Here are twelve rules that she recently developed for me to follow at home; they are intended to eradicate my dom side through behavioral training. It won't be news to any of you that it is very hard to act assertively, if you are carefully abiding by the following:

Rule 1: Always do precisely as instructed, at once and without complaint.

Rule 2: Never speak unless spoken to. When speaking, speak softly.

Rule 3: Never wear clothing below waist inside the house, unless expressly directed.

Rule 4: Always wear high heels inside the house, unless directed otherwise.

Rule 5: Never take long strides. Take tiny, mincing, scurrying steps.

Rule 6: Never sit in presence of superiors unless expressly invited.

Rule 7: Always curtsy and nod when encountering a superior.

Rule 8: Always keep face and chest clean-shaven.

Rule 9: Always keep all orifices rigorously clean.

Rule 10: Always maintain a disciplined posture.

Does anyone have suggestions for additional rules that will keep me alert to my inferior/submissive status?

The words 'inferior' and 'submissive' do not sit well in the same sentence when I read them together. It is my opinion that submissives are nor inferior, but equals and the only difference is that they enjoy doing what they are told to do for the pleasure of another.

Having said that, I would also like to mention that, in my opinion, anyone that has to 'eradicate' something about someone else because 'they don't like it' seems pretty shallow and domineering to me. Not dominant, but domineering. However, if this is a change that you wanted to make in the first place and you have no objections, then I take that back and will tell you to have fun and party on.

A person cannot just be told that they are submissive. You couldn't just walk up to the Pope and tell him he's a Methodist and have it be so. If you have the inclination to be submissive, and it sounds like you probably do anyway, then you can have that side of yourself coaxed to the front and brought forth through discipline and training. In which case, I think thew rules set forth by your partner are very good ones and will more than likely do just that. That is, if takinig baby steps doesn't drive you up the wall first. LOL

But enough from the psychology and self-help sections, let's get to the effeminization and humiliation sections:


If your wife truly wants to effiminate you and humiliate you for her own personal amusement, I reccomend the following things:

Have her buy you a corset and some really pretty knee high boots with heels. You'll look great in them adn it's really hard to forget that your someone's slut when you're dressed like it.

Butt plugs are really nice accessories for the wants-to-be-a-slut person. Preferably one that will be just a little uncomfortable when worn.

I don't know if you guys share your relationship outside of the home, but if you do, then being made to serve at a dinner party of some of your wife's female friends dressed in a humiliating and/or effiminate manner can always be great.

Spankings or some other form of discipline should be used to make sure your new teachings take hold. Depending on how open-minded and willing you are to experiement, forgetfulness could easily result in all sorts of nasty things, from being used as a toilet to enemas to whatever else you partner's devious mind can come up with.


OKay, this is really getting me going. I have to stop or I'll sit here and write a freakin' novel on this stuff. Have fun and good luck.

Thanks, tourguide, you hit the nail on the head with your comment that a submissive should not be considered inferior. What I meant to communicate is that I am being trained to accept my status as inferior to my wife (and other women, she says), as part of our d/s roleplay. My wife says that this is needed because I am so often "full of myself."

You also were accurate in your assumption that I must have submissive inclinations. The truth is that I am much happier when I am being humiliated, feminized and generally overwhelmed. When I am assertive, I become judgmental and short-tempered, which is why we have agreed that we should nurture my submissive nature!

You are right that the tiny steps are a trial. I must admit that I am tempted to cheat when she is not around, but the heels make a very different sound against the wood floors when I do. Also, my wife sometimes slips outside to observe me through a window, so I often don't really know if I am unobserved. Being released from the heels is the greatest gift that I receive when she declares a "recess" for my exemplary behavior.

I enjoyed thinking about your suggestions, which I will pass on. She already has threatened to expose me to her best friend, and it made me very hot when she punished me by blindfolding me, making me stand in the living room wearing nothing but my heels, and telling me that her friend might be stopping by that afternoon. She didn't stop by, but it was agonizing standing there wondering what I would do if the doorbell rang. Sweet agony, BTW, because I fantasize about this woman, and my wife knows it.

Thanks again.

The "slave mode" style of speech is a pretty good ongoing training tool. It can look forced and artificial, but the fact that you have to plan what to say is part of the point.

The first rule is that you always speak of yourself in the third person. You may just use some phrase like "this slave", but your Mistress might encourage and reward you for being creative (and making it more interesting for her to hear) with variations like "Mistress' boy" and "this man-toy".

The second rule, which not everyone feels is necessary, is that you always refer to your Mistress as such, and never say "you".

Finally, you might be encouraged to elaborate it with compliments to your Mistress and deprecating references to yourself. So you might find yourself saying things like "Will the beautiful Mistress want more service with her bath, or may this lowly servant go finish his humble chores and come back to have the undeserved privilege of drying Mistress' awesome body?" Composing that sort of sentence regularly as an exercise in submission is bound to make an impression on your own feelings, and your Mistress will enjoy the ego stroking as well.

I enjoy flowery speech as part of D/s but I don't get off on the Gor-ish "this slave" speech training. I admit it can be effective, but I don't like it as a personal preference. I value my submissives too much to have them degrade themselves every time they open their mouths... that's my job! :D

I like the second rule you mentioned much better leo. That seems incredibly natural to me. I've altered even that a bit though. If I'm writing then I typically refer to my Mistress as such at least once per paragraph and use pronouns otherwise. If I'm speaking, I usually say "Mistress" or "my Lady" at least once per set of phrases and always when answering a direct question. I feel that pronouns have their place, especially since "Mistress, Mistress, my Lady, Mistress, Mistress, Mistress, my Lady, Mistress, Mistress..." gets boring very quickly.

And for the record, if anyone called my body "awesome" to my face... well... I'm afraid I'd laugh myself silly. :p

PS I think this is a fabulous thread starken. I also agree with BDSM_Tourguide's reply. The man clearly knows what he's doing. :) I especially like the suggestion where forgetfulness was mentioned.

My Mistress often assigns certain tasks and checks up to be sure they were done correctly and timely. At first I used a reminder program on my computer and on my cellphone (it has a scheduler). However, she frowned on that. She preferred the idea of me remembering on my own.

Well... I'm a forgetful little slut at times. I often miss a detail or three. It offers her ample opportunity to punish me in all sorts of delicious, horrible, sexy, humiliating, and frightening ways. It also allows me to feel useful. I know I'm doing things that she wants or perhaps even needs. Such usefulness seems to be at the core of my submissive nature.

Bah, I've gone off on a bit of a tangent. Basically, I wish to highly recommend "to do" lists that she may write down and check off later... but that you must only commit to memory. 'Tis great fun.

Having just gone lifestyle in our house, I'll definitely watch to see if further posts are made to this thread. We aren't public, and have small children, so it will be an "after bedtime" thing, but I have opaqued our front door windows, so now the dresscode is strictly nude for k.

Also with the honorifics, it is tough to quickly change almost 15 years of inertia together, but we'll work on keeping the roles more appropriately addressed going forward.

Good luck,
Alaric

Quote:

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Originally posted by Alaric
Having just gone lifestyle in our house, I'll definitely watch to see if further posts are made to this thread. We aren't public, and have small children, so it will be an "after bedtime" thing, but I have opaqued our front door windows, so now the dresscode is strictly nude for k.

Also with the honorifics, it is tough to quickly change almost 15 years of inertia together, but we'll work on keeping the roles more appropriately addressed going forward.

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Another useful way to get into the feel of the roles is to give your slave a gesture of submission to make any time you enter the room or she comes into a room where you are. Mine had to lift her breasts in both hands and say "Yours, Master," but pick something that feels suitably degrading to her.

I'd rather choose something that could easily be done in public or the company of vanillas... a shallow curtsy or bow perhaps, or something as simple and nearly unnoticeable as the submissive touching their throat with two fingers and thinking, "Yours (insert title and name here)." It's a wonderful idea though leo.

If you want to be totaly subserviant to your wilf, and she have you this way as well. try Castity devises for you. There are some that can be used even when you have to go out in public as well ,adn can be kepped covered. Though don't go though a metal detector.

there are plastic ones too ;)

My sub is required to position himself lower than my shoulders at any time that he is in my presence. So, if I am sitting on a chair, you will likely find him on his knees or sitting on the floor. In the event that he is fetching something for me, he may stand with permission if it is something hot such as coffee or when he is in the kitchen preparing it. Otherwise, he may crawl to serve me.


As he has to be always aware of how I have positioned myself, he is also constantly cognizant of his role and who has the control in this relationship.

BTW, I like how your wife thinks, starken ;)

ValKyrie:

Thanks for the suggestion. We are using it now.

I also like how she thinks! She keeps me on my toes. Literally!

Are there are other suggestions? Lady Superior thinks the list should be longer.

starken

Worth a second read, I think.