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So I cam to these boards to learn more about D/s relationships, etc. Mostly so I can do more to be good for Mistress. Is there any sort of etiquette regarding having an online Mistress and my quasi R/l one? It seems like I shouldn't, but I want to learn more to please her, and she did suggest I spend some time learning more about all of this in my free time? Any suggestions/advice?
Hi Gumby,
I think the most important thing to say about this that is all personal. You have to find a way (rules, etiquettes, boundries, etc) together with your Mistress. There is no standard whats however online regarding etiquettes in an online D/s relationship. You could start out with making a list of questions which can specify the etiquettes that apply to you.
You can add questions like:
"How would you like me to adress you?" (Some Dom(mes) like it when you adress them as Master or Mistress, some do not)
"Are we playing continuously or is there room for normal conversation so that we are equal?"
"Can I contact you or do I have to wait until you contact me?"
"Do I have to check in on certain times"
etc etc the list goes on and on...
Good luck!
Mysc
You're in a situation where you're with a r/l Mistress (in the same town, or close by?) who kind of ordered you to find an online Mistress to train you?
Interesting, for one thing those two ladies should be in touch with each other. It would be useful too if you settle will you always be strictly the slave of your online mistress when you're online, and will she be able to control whom you're interacting with, playing with (some Domiants wilol deamnd strict control of that).
Many people here have an etiquette rule of address that the Dominant's name is written in upper casing ("Sir James/Mistress Angela") but the sub's name in lower casing ("slave anne"); that applies also when it's just the first names, or when a pronoun is used ("Her slave/gumby's Domme")). Also, the slave should avoid when possible to refer to him/herself in first person (I, me, my) and say, like, "the slave's errors", "louise's Domme", "punishing slave kathleen". All of which is optional of course.
hmm I really misunderstood your question Gumby... sorry
No, it's based on what you are comfortable with. Official titles and slave grovelling I think is best kept in the role-playing section of this forum.
You are after all only a slave to the women you chose to surrender to, right? Not the others.
not sure you did Mysc, I guess the OP could have been a little more clear about what he was asking for advice about.
My thought is that as long as you are honest with everyone involved there should be no problems. something you might want to consider is joining the Academy. This will allow you to gain experience without actually having to deal with an online Domme.
Thank you for the input. Basically, Mistress is halfway across the country and after a scene while speaking she suggested I take some time to read some more regarding the while D/s thing. She didn't tell me to find an online Dom, and I suppose you are right, I should ask her before considering it.
I should have been a bit more clear in how I'd worded my post, and will do my best to be more specific in the future. Thank you all very much though, all of your responses were quite helpful, and actually brought up some new things that i should discuss with Her. Thanks again guys, really, you've already been more help than you know.