a sorry introduction

Hello one and all,

my name is susan. i have lived my whole life wishing and wanting nothing more than to have been born a woman. i know that a terrible mistake was made with me. unfortunately i was born genetically a male (yuuck!!). Although i don't look particularly feminine, i feel most like a woman when i can dress en femme. i wonder how my life would have been different if i had the courage to begin a male-to-female gender change process when i was younger? i think i would have been far happier as a mannish looking woman than i am now as a regretful middle aged male. i hate my body. if fact, there is little i like about the male body in general (sorry guys). i want to be surrounded by pink frilly things. soft cuddly things, scented delicious things. above all though, i want to have another woman love me and take charge of me. i feel an inexplicable need to give myself to another woman. to be surrounded only by things female.

well, there it is. i told you it was a sorry introduction. sometimes i feel so helpless. sometimes i feel so distant from myself and my own body (which i can't even stand to look at in the mirror any more). but most of the time, i look out at the world from a woman's eyes and a woman's perspective that only i know and i feel. i'm trapped in my own mind and my own body. it's a feeling and a fate i wouldn't wish upon anyone.

god i wish i had been born a woman.

:welcome: to the Libray susan. Nice to meet you. I want you to know that you are not the only one here who feels that way, we have a fair share of CD's and transgendered here, in fact there is a thrread about it here.

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/sh...ad.php?t=11784

And there are some Otherkin here as well, and so we also understand completely. Welcome!

:welcomebo

Hello Susan - Welcome

Hello and Welcome fellow Canadian!!

Welcome. It is never too late to follow your dreams.

:wel

Hello, susan, welcome. I hope you find a place here.

Hi Susan and welcome to the forum. As Rhabbi said, there are others here who are in the same position as you. Hope you have a happy time here though.

Welcome to the Forums. I hope you enjoy your time here with us, and find your way to those who share similar experiences with you.

angel xx

Hi Susan and welcome - yup, you're not the only transgendered here. :wave: Though I'm not aiming at body change and isn't as, well, uncomfrtable with the male body as you sound, I do appreciate and understaand your feelings and you can always pm or e-mail me if you need to talk and share things.

a big hug and hello and welcome to the forums

cg and S1

Welcome :wave:

Welcome susan, enjoy the Forums you will meet some wonderful people.

S1 and his cg xx

WELCOME Susan... hope you find what you are seeking here...

Hello and welcome Susan. I think you will find a home here.

Hi Susan,

Welcome to the forums, and I do hope you will find both friends and acceptance here

Miami C.

Welcome Susan! A fellow Ontario resident too!