What's your funniest session?

In many places I read comments from people into BDSM who seem to think it's all so serious that they can never have any fun with it. One sub regards it as so serious she is insulted that some call it "play."

Well people are only human. Things go wrong or don't work out as planned. The answering machine might come to life in the middle of an intense exchange, a cuff might come undone, "you know who" might lock themselves in handcuffs only to be taken advantage of by a mischievous sub. What silly, fun, stupid, things have happened to derail a session you have been involved in?

Since I don't have tons of experience, I'll relate something that happened between my wife and me before BDSM. Well it was still a very intense session.

There I was my face buried deep between her legs, the intensity was building, our breathing quickened our minds and bodies locked together, united in purpose. Then it happened, she passed gas. No, she let one really rip. :28: It was loud, it was very odoriferous, it was completely unnoticed by her. She didn't understand why I stopped. When I told her she didn't believe me. :cae7gler: The look on her face was priceless, a mixture of arousal and confusion. Then she laughed, because the look on my face was the same. In the end we had to finish in another room, laughing the whole time, while the bedroom aired out. :264:

Don't be shy. We wanna know all the ridiculous details!

LOL!!! I recounted this story elsewhere in the forums a few weeks ago, but it still cracks me up...

I was with an online Dom, had been for about 4 months...we were in a session, and all of a sudden He starts calling me "mommy" and wanting me to breastfeed Him!

Well, being the dutiful lil subbie that i am, i went along with it....not COMFORTABLY, mind you, but i went along....and he ended up trying to get me to "top from the bottom", which i am JUST NOT WIRED FOR!...and it just kept getting weirder and weirder, and uglier and uglier.....finally, He cracked himself up....

Cowboy: <going out of character for moment> that was like the most poorly thought out role play I have ever done......... I should have my role play license taken away from me lol!
Cowboy: Kisses my baby
butterfly: kisses "my" baby LOL!
Cowboy: fucking breast feeder with a 8" cock???
Cowboy: wtf was i thinking??

After that, me made me swear to never bring it up again...and all i ever had to do from then on was mention "breastfeeding"!

Role play has it's challenges, but if two people know eachother well, even the bad ones can become a mutual gigglefest....

OK..........food play session......

MMMM........sitting at his feet being fed like a pet........YUM

He fed me WAY to much pizza. But that was the point....eating from His had. What ever was feed to me.

so..........he has his cock down my throat.....and well......a bit more then a gag reflex........lol.......i pucked on his dick!.........


I was mortified.......and He couldn't stop laughing!

Well i can laugh now...........It wasn't my fault!.....LMAO

quite a few lol ..our first! my period came early and unlike every other month i had absolutely no warning signs lol then like thrall we both got a bit too carried away with the deep throat and that got a bit messy too :icon176: as we were in the hilton at the time and we had nothing to clean up with properly it made it even more embarrasing, we got out of there asap.

then there was the time Icehawk had totally hogtied me before realising i was still wearing pants...normally i dont even wear them! ive had my head slammed inside the fridge ...there's been a few mishaps really lol

Wow, I'll have to be careful wandering around these folks, they're all so...serious.:rolleyes:

C'mon, don't be shy. This is silliness, but it's real life. You know nothing ever goes right 100% of the time. (Even for all you serious 24/7 folks.:bondage:) Or maybe there are only three brave subs hanging around on this site.

:whip: We won't laugh at you...well not too hard!

LMAO.........land of the free........and home of the brave.........*wink*

Who said free?

Now there's a price I can afford!

Icey........oh god......housekeeping staff..........LMAO!

Why is it that they always knock and say housekeeping.....AS...they are opening the door????

Oh well.........i just leave great big tips!

Hi Gang,
I don't post to often 'cause I seem to be able to kill a thread so easily, none the less.
While both my wife/sub and I live the lifestyle for real, I still can't see any reason why it can't be fun and a laugh as well???

Well, the wife/sub was bound spread eagle, gagged with high heels, stockings, breasts bound together with nipple clamps, blindfolded it was "ALL GOOD".
We also had a 12 week old puppy, now there I was licking away to my hearts content driving my sub mad when all of a sudden there was a cold wet nose stuck right on my nipper. I let out a few curt words almost shoving my head right inside, as it scared the living crap outta me. :eek:
Now, my sub couldn't see a thing but she knew what happened and was crackin' up laughing even though she couldn't see a thing. Imagine the laughter from a ball gag???
Even now, it comes up in conversation between a couple of us....

A few more conventional mishaps aside, there was the thing with the chair. He has this large and comfortable office chair, which he decided to tie me to (which actually worked like a charm). I was pretty much immobile -- unfortunately the chair wasn't. When he decided this was the time he wanted to fuck me, the stupid chair began to wander across the room. I had to giggle, but suppressed it somehow -- the the very moment where he almost fell because the chair moved faster than he did. In that moment it was over, I couldn't stop laughing anymore, which made him laugh (and say something between the lines 'Goddamnit, I wanna finish that!' which made me laugh even more). It was hilarious. It was hopeless. But seriously, we learned a valuable lesson: always block the wheels :)

Moonraker (my dom) and I have e-dates in which I dress up for him. This time I decided to surprise him and become "doggie girl". I attatched a long curly tail (made out of silken yarn) to my plug. Over the headset he tells me which positions to be in -this one was laying on top of my hitachi wand. After several cums -I pleaded no more please! and he said ok you can relax. I was so exhausted I barely had the strength to move.
I rolled over only to have the wand get tangled in my tail, thus hitting my plug, causing it to buzz, forcing 2 more cums before I could get free. Never even knowing this could happen - we laugh about it even now (and realized I am capable of anal cums too).

that kinda brings new meaning to the saying, "I always get it in the end" :)

My master found this bendy plastic rod thing and he had used it in a few sessions with good results. It was flexible so it gave a nice little sting.

So we had just started playing, and I was on my hands and knees in front of him, and he was using the bendy rod thing to hit me, when it got a kink in it and bent down the middle, limp. My master frowned at it, grabbed some duct tape, and fixed the weak spot. All better! But a few thwaks later, the spot just above the tape weakend and the rod bent over again. He taped it again, and one thwak later, droop! I started giggling, and he looked at me sternly and I stopped. But then his eye twinkled and I giggled again, and he started laughing. He said "Aw, give me a hug!" and stretched out his arms. I leaped to my feet and into his arms, and he swung me around while we laughed.