My Mary Sue

I have been writing for a while. I have only just begun writing erotic BDSM. I've written a lot but it's a new genre for me and I'm not sure which techniques work in it and which work against it. So, I've been writing mindlessly, just to have some clay to work with.

I submitted a couple of these stories, drafted once to take out stuff that is unarguably bad writing regardless of genre.

One thing I realized in drafting one of the stories was that my main character was a Mary Sue. My writing is total wish fulfillment so I had no call to be so annoyed with myself for writing a Mary Sue but I was. I didn't want to rewrite the whole charcter so I made it a plot point. This ended up being a pretty interesting eventuality but that is besides the point, really.

Here are some questions you might enjoy answering and discussing. I'd certainly love to hear your thoughts.:

Do you guys notice a lot of Mary Sues in this genre? Does it bother you as much as in other types of fiction? Or do you think it works in this particular genre? What do you think constitutes a bdsm Mary Sue?

Oddly enough, when you phrase it like that it seems that every bdsm story has a certain element of wish fulfillment and as such Mary Sues should have a welcome home in the genre.
On the other hand, I think the Mary Sues are the kind of characters that are... difficult to relate to. They tend to be too uneblievable, too good, too perfect, too whatever, and as such the reader can't imagine themselves in her place (or his place, in the case of Gary Stues). That could detract from the pleasure of reading.