Good Evening, new to D/s life, amongst other things

Okay so, if anyone has read my introduction, you might remember what I said about myself but i'll cover it again quickly.

Essentially I am younger, 20, and am a Dom, I haven't been involved with the community RL so I don't know much I can claim being a dom as of yet, but I have been in several D/s relationships over the web. Which have generally ended poorly, and i've attempted to become better with each.

That being said I AM new to the D/s situation and am working on becoming stronger and such. I have some self-confidence issues which im working on breaking through so....I guess that's where i'll lead off with as question number1:

1. As a Dom, I realize I need to find myself so to speak, but for working through self-confidence problems, like worry's if Im doing a good job and such, how would I go about dealing with that.

Okay second part, as stated in my intro, I am currently involved in a relationship where while im her Dom, I am also her "Daddy" so to speak, as shes into being treated as a babygirl, diapered, so on and so forth, which while shes into that I know, at least partially, stems from a need to be degraded and humiliated... That being said, its only online for the time being with I believe we both hope to move into RL, but we both have our own respective history with relationships...thus were moving slowly.

But along with that is sating those desires of hers, and mine as Daddy and Master, via the web and what I have her do. Were still defining things hard and soft limits so on and so forth but that being said, and I realize there are threads on this but....

2. As a Master, or if anyone has any experience in a situation similar to this, if not just input as a Master (or mistress) do you have any thoughts how to handle this, move it forward, various humiliation techniques and so on I could implement. As well if it would help I can write up what Im already having her do and so on...

And for the moment I believe those are my two major questions. I look forward to learning alot and learning to be the best Master and Dom I can be.

Thank you,

Father Time Jr

Quote:

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Originally Posted by FatherTimejr

1. As a Dom, I realize I need to find myself so to speak, but for working through self-confidence problems, like worry's if Im doing a good job and such, how would I go about dealing with that.

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I am going to answer only the first question, because thats the only thing I have experience with, but I am sure there are others here who can help with the second part. :)

You need to find yourself because you are 20. The cure for that, as well as self-assurance, is time and learning. And patience.

Worrying if you are doing a good job is a sign of a good Dom and a person who cares. It is not a sign of weakness, but assurance to your sub that she can trust you with herself.

Welcome to the Library,
:wave:

As for question number one I believe AdrianaAurora has allready answered that as well as anyone could.

As for question number two:

Comunication with your submissive is key. Dom/sub is a two way street, and a feedback dialoge is essential.

My owner is fond of saying that his best teachers in the "art of dominion" as he calls it were allways the individual submissives themselves.

The more you know what she wants feels knows etc etc, then the better you can be with her.

Talking to her is vital.

well thank you both for your replys, means a great deal, and they both make alot of sense. I know I have not lived that long and alot of my issues will just take time and living to figure out, and time spent working through them with myself.

And yes, I do my best to keep communication, communication is important to me, openess is key. Along with my golden rule....Secrets are the devil -hates secrets- anyways....yeah it'll take time but being new to things I am curious different routes people would take, or well..I know its on a case by case basis but...

Thank you very much for the welcome -grins-

Well, as a note, the relationship thus mentioned has gone south. She decided she wasnt ready for a relationship or such as it stands. SO this Dom is single once again.

Think I learned some things and well yeah. But thank you for your post on that denuseri -smiles- anyways hopefully I will learn more for the future.