bdsm and kink

When I first came to the US lists some years back, I had to have all the abbreviations explained as in my country we only had two expressions, and then it seemed to me that 'kink' and 'bdsm' were the same. But now I see people distinguishing.

I would like to hear about this.

Is 'kink' different from bdsm, and if so, how?
Has there been a shift in how the expressions are used, somehow?

is one better than the other?

I think of kink as more of a bedroom thing, and bdsm as more of a lifestyle thing, but I don't know if this is standard usage.

Too many definitions.

I'd suggest that kink is an intersecting set, which might include things that are within the world of bdsm and outside of that world. Strictly speaking, for example, clothing fetishes are outside of bdsm, but fall within it the moment you add "control" and power exchange aspects.

The BD refers to bondage and discipline. The SM refers to sadism and masochism (i.e., pain.) DS, the middle initials, have been "adopted" to mean domination and submission, (including power exhange.)

So anything else that would qualify as kinky sex, is only part of bdsm if done in the context of one of the above.

In my opinion of course.

I would definitely have to agree with Oz on this one. Kink is just something that's a bit out of the "norm." But when put in context of DS, it changes completely.

Take, for example, any kind of fetish. Let's use latex just for grins and giggles. If you like to be completely covered in latex when you're having sex, then it's just simply a kink. But, the moment that some sort of power exchange (ie. Domination, submission, surrender) happens, then it becomes BDSM lifestyle.

I think, perhaps, even though it's a kink, any kind of bondage would be lifestyle related.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Ozme52

I'd suggest that kink is an intersecting set, which might include things that are within the world of bdsm and outside of that world. Strictly speaking, for example, clothing fetishes are outside of bdsm, but fall within it the moment you add "control" and power exchange aspects.

The BD refers to bondage and discipline. The SM refers to sadism and masochism (i.e., pain.) DS, the middle initials, have been "adopted" to mean domination and submission, (including power exhange.)

So anything else that would qualify as kinky sex, is only part of bdsm if done in the context of one of the above.

In my opinion of course.

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That's how I understand and use the terms. If I get a kick out of pissing on someone, that's kinky, but if they're cheerfully accepting of it then it's not BDSM. That comes in if they're ordered or bound into accepting it. If they accept it freely but experience it as an awful degradation, it's on the borderline.