what is the differences between...

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12-21-2009
13'sbadkitty

what is the differences between...

ok i am called a pet by my Master and i have read here all different "types" of people here ranging the gambit i guess. What if anything makes one a pet or slave different from the other and also we all submissives? Is it a preference of title, or a different experience all together? i have searched and i can't find an answer. i know my Master and i live together now but W/we haven't always and the 24/7 thing just sort of started out of me needing to feel safe for a period and W/we liked it so it stuck.
12-21-2009
Midnytedreams

A Master or Mistress can order a slave to eat out of a bowl on the floor, to get in a cage.
A slave may not care for this but will do it because they are commanded to {not a hard limit} for them.

A pet on the other hand desires to be in the cage, to eat out of their bowl.. to be a pet

The only difference is the sub herself and how she wishes to be known
12-21-2009
Ozme52

Quote:

Originally Posted by Midnytedreams

A Master or Mistress can order a slave to eat out of a bowl on the floor, to get in a cage.
A slave may not care for this but will do it because they are commanded to {not a hard limit} for them.

Don't try to put labels on the activities of others. My submissive is in no way my slave (by our perceptions and preferences, and if I decide to stuff her in a cage, make her eat out of a dog bowl, or any number of "petlike" activities, she will. BTW, animal play is a limit. So we do it in a different context. She loves her leash, when I decide to treat her as a human pet, or just as my leashed submissive.

Quote:

A pet on the other hand desires to be in the cage, to eat out of their bowl.. to be a pet

And yet my real dog hates her cage and would prefer to be handfed.

Quote:

The only difference is the sub herself and how she wishes to be known

Not that either, it really is more up to the dominant. Sure, he may choose titles or labels that please her, but, imo, the dom chooses.

My answer to badkitty is that whatever you are called, however you think of yourself in your relationship with your dominant, it doesn't really matter so long as it pleases you both.

What the names and labels mean to the two of you needs only your dual alignment in those meanings. And if you're happy, who cares what others think of your titles.

That said, if you use them within the larger community, it helps to understand others' perceptions of their use.
12-22-2009
Midnytedreams

Ozme52

As for putting labels on someone it seems like you want to do that more than anyone .
Comparing a dog to a submissive, I won't even comment on that one.

I have seen many such as you who think you determine the depth of a submissive's, submission.

Truth is we as Doms /Dommes allow the submissive to find herself, through the trust and bond developed in the relationship.

They, the submissive decide the amount and depth of their own submission.

Yes we help and guide them along that journey. The difference is I see my role, task , job as showing her she has the freedom to explore her own submission.

The roles of pet and slave as I commented on were about the mental aspect of the submissive, and the differences between them, a pet is nothing more than another step in submissive journey if she choises it to be..
12-22-2009
Miner

Quote:

Originally Posted by Midnytedreams

Ozme52

As for putting labels on someone it seems like you want to do that more than anyone .
Comparing a dog to a submissive, I won't even comment on that one.

I'm not sure how much experience you have, Midnytedreams, and I'm sure Oz will respond to defend himself (quite rightly). I'd be careful about aspersions and the casting thereof, though!

However, your comment, above, is off-track in two ways. Firstly, Oz did not specifically compare a dog to a submissive - he compared a pet to a 'pet'. There is a difference.

Secondly, you might do some research on submissives and pet play. There are indeed people whose fetish includes human 'animals'. That is: some submissives become human puppies, dogs, cats, pigs, ponies. They are treated like and act as though they were the animal of their fetish and would take exception to your comment.

Pet play runs as large a gamut as any other kink in BDSM. My girl is called 'pet', we do not do 'classic' pet-play at all, despite the fact that when she goes deep into sub-space she loses the power of speech and yowls/purrs like a cat instead. The word 'pet' is a term of endearment between us instead. I know subs who spend considerable time acting like a dog - in all aspects of dog behaviour. I've never felt over attracted to that sort of treatment (far from attracted, truth be told), but then, that's not my kink.

As in everythiong, what works for the people in a relationship and is done with consent in acceptable.
12-22-2009
Midnytedreams

Miner
As you clearly stated and I did , being a pet is the submissives choice, Each of us have our own kinks.

All I stated was it was their choice ,not the Doms.

I have been in the lifestyle close to thirty years. long before the internet . And the one thing I know is respect of anyones kinks in whichever form it may be.Yes my pet name for my sub is {pet}.

I have met others in the lifestyle who practice all forms of kink in r/l
leather, pony play, ownership of pets..I have been a member of several clubs, held parties at my home ,attended munches and getaways. I live a 24/7 lifestyle and always have,, not the physical as that I have found to be impossible to maintain, but the mental....If it has been published I have read it about the lifestyle.

So thats my qualifications , I don't back down when someone takes what I say and twists it around, in r/l or here.
12-22-2009
Archeon

Ignoring the penis measuring going on here, I will reply to the original poster.

As you may have extracted from the above posts there are are 2 main references to "pets". On the one hand pet is a very common nickname/name of endearment/name for submissives and slaves, and is no more than being called anything else that your Master/Dom can think up. The other is to be "A pet" where you would spend the majority of your time indulged in pet play, ie either pretending to be a human pet, kitty, dog, puppy, snake, chipmunk, hamster etc.

As Oz stated earlier, what label you give yourself is irrelevant, as long as it works for you and you are happy. If you are worried what to identify on here as, then no one is really going to question you too much if you identify as a submissive or a pet.

Regards,

Arch
12-22-2009
13'sbadkitty

Quote:

Originally Posted by Archeon

Ignoring the penis measuring going on here, I will reply to the original poster.

As you may have extracted from the above posts there are are 2 main references to "pets". On the one hand pet is a very common nickname/name of endearment/name for submissives and slaves, and is no more than being called anything else that your Master/Dom can think up. The other is to be "A pet" where you would spend the majority of your time indulged in pet play, ie either pretending to be a human pet, kitty, dog, puppy, snake, chipmunk, hamster etc.

As Oz stated earlier, what label you give yourself is irrelevant, as long as it works for you and you are happy. If you are worried what to identify on here as, then no one is really going to question you too much if you identify as a submissive or a pet.

Regards,

Arch

thanks, i have not worried for here so much...i think as i see people who identify themselves as slaves feel the same affection for their Masters/Mistresses and the same reversed i was wondering if there is a different experience leaving the pet play to the side. i feel cherished and loved...no matter what He asks of me. but at the same time i feel enslaved but in a good way. this is why He calls me silly...all the small details i spend time on. ;)
12-22-2009
thepast

And 13, as you can tell, you are going to get 100 different opinions if you ask 100 different people what "pet" means. A lot of it is about the context that you use the term in.

For instance:
"pet, could you bring me my drink?" Would generally be construed to most as pet being used in the "term of endearment" context.

Whereas:
"My pet bitch likes to be collared & caged and fed from a dog bowl. She's most happy on all fours serving me like the little dog bitch that she is." Might be more construed as someone into the kink of actual pet play.

It's all about the context of the term. Now, I think where a lot of the "confusion" gets people is when the "term of endearment" crosses over into actual pet play... which is something I think Oz was alluding to a bit... for instance, when a submissive may enjoy being leashed at her Dominant's feet, not for the hard-core kink of pet play, but more as a soft-kink of collar/leash play. Is that "pet play" or is that simply collar/leash play? It's whatever you wish to call it :) But if, in that context, you were to say, "this is my pet," you might get people w/varying opinions as to whether you meant to say "this is my pet" as in a term of endearment or as in pet-play.

Confused yet? LOL...

Simply put... any term or label has a million different interpretations. There is no "right or wrong" interpretation, per se, they are all just different ones in different contexts. The important thing is that everyone is respectful of everyone else's interpretations & opinions.

13, enjoy whatever label your Dominant uses, and enjoy your relationship :)
12-22-2009
brwneydgirl

Quote:

Originally Posted by Archeon

On the one hand pet is a very common nickname/name of endearment/name for submissives and slaves, and is no more than being called anything else that your Master/Dom can think up. The other is to be "A pet" where you would spend the majority of your time indulged in pet play, ie either pretending to be a human pet, kitty, dog, puppy, snake, chipmunk, hamster etc.

Succinct and clear. Thank you.
12-22-2009
Ozme52

Thanx Miner.
12-23-2009
Guera

I consider myself an owner and my him as pet, basically because it's the best label that I can come up with. I think, in my mind, owner to pet indicates a relationship where the master/owner/domme cares for, takes prides in, and maybe even coddles the pet. The owner takes responsibility as an owner would. I can't say how master/slave relationshps are defined, it is completely up to the two people in the relationship. However, to me, I think a slave is a more concrete 24/7 role, and also I think there might be a bit more of a power dynamic (as opposed to owner-pet).

I have "pulled rank" on my him a few times, by ordering him to do things he resisted but I wanted, outside of playtime. If I did that more frequently, I think it might not work. Again, just a guess, but I think a slave would be more comfortable accepting orders from the master. Of course, if you asked me this again in a few years, I might have a different answer, especially if I am still involved with my him after all that time.
12-23-2009
Guera

Another thing: my him likes to lie at my feet on the floor. It's kinda hard to not think of him as a pet.
02-14-2010
summerBreeze{EDQ}

I like your style I think it would suit me better. Personally Id rather be lead than forced,but then I am very new to this.
02-15-2010
13'sbadkitty

i have given this alot of thought. W/we have a puppy in r/l. it isn't his choice to be owned, although he enjoys being owned. it isn't his choice to do what i tell him, but he obeys because he loves to please me. i sit and stroke him in my lap as i read or watch tv, also not his choice but he loves any attention i give him. i provide all his needs, he provides me with complete love and devotion.
i am a pet because of all the things that make my puppy a pet. he doesn't always please me, like i don't always please my Master and although i have never flogged my puppy he gets consequenses too. i treat him well because i love him and he is mine to care for.
i love to sit at His feet, i love to please Him. i am owned beyond choice, yet i love that He owns me. He takes care of me and loves me and has so much affection for me that i understand what that means to me. thanks everyone.
02-15-2010
denuseri

There are many different ways to view the use of such descriptive terms of Identity.

For those in whom my initial training lay the only distinction of any kind in this regard was between a submissive and a slave, other titles were considered by them to be terms of endearment.

For me based from my own experience and observations it has been like a journey and I have seen many myself included stop along the path of submission at different points for various reasons, somtimes even reversing direction alltogether.

Regardless of what title you wish.

In my heart the path to that of being a kajira (a slave) was one of self awarness and truth.

First I was free and curious and only really playing at being a submissive, eventually even submitting on occasion to the will of another or many as the whim may strike .

Then later, I started to actually feel as if it was right for me to be submissive and seek it out, craving the feeling it gives and found myself submiting in more and more ways to specific individuals. Sometimes even falling deeply in love and this is where most of us stop.

Rarely but it can happen:

When the strength of the bond between a dominant and one's submissive is great enough (strength of character etc not merely the physical) and the, respect, trust and devotion is tempered by a sence of disipline that grows with a love that knows no boundary...

....you start to submit not only to your dominant, but to yourself as well.

Any conflict you struggled with about your submission dies with this acceptance and what you thought was your submission before becomes somthing so strong the word love only begins to describe it, and the bond between you and your dominant is made stronger than anything eaither of you could ever imagine...

It is then you learn what true joy and freedom lays in your utter surrender to another.

It is then that you wake up a slave at the feet of your Owner.
02-16-2010
13'sbadkitty

Quote:

Originally Posted by denuseri

There are many different ways to view the use of such descriptive terms of Identity.

For those in whom my initial training lay the only distinction of any kind in this regard was between a submissive and a slave, other titles were considered by them to be terms of endearment.

For me based from my own experience and observations it has been like a journey and I have seen many myself included stop along the path of submission at different points for various reasons, somtimes even reversing direction alltogether.

Regardless of what title you wish.

In my heart the path to that of being a kajira (a slave) was one of self awarness and truth.

First I was free and curious and only really playing at being a submissive, eventually even submitting on occasion to the will of another or many as the whim may strike .

Then later, I started to actually feel as if it was right for me to be submissive and seek it out, craving the feeling it gives and found myself submiting in more and more ways to specific individuals. Sometimes even falling deeply in love and this is where most of us stop.

Rarely but it can happen:

When the strength of the bond between a dominant and one's submissive is great enough (strength of character etc not merely the physical) and the, respect, trust and devotion is tempered by a sence of disipline that grows with a love that knows no boundary...

....you start to submit not only to your dominant, but to yourself as well.

Any conflict you struggled with about your submission dies with this acceptance and what you thought was your submission before becomes somthing so strong the word love only begins to describe it, and the bond between you and your dominant is made stronger than anything eaither of you could ever imagine...

It is then you learn what true joy and freedom lays in your utter surrender to another.

It is then that you wake up a slave at the feet of your Owner.

Thank you, that was beautiful. As you may recall i was recently punished by removal of my collar and was only allowed to behave vanilla towards Him. i was lost, utterly lost. i begged for my collar back, i begged for the privilege to kneel at His feet. i am not sure what label that end up with me as, but He has said that it was at that moment He knew He owned me completely.