New Domme + New Submissive

Hi everyone; I'm not quite sure where to start..

My puppy and I have recently discovered BDSM and we are more than interested in the lifestyle; but we have no idea where to start.

I have bought him a collar and we would like to go ahead with it all slowly and carefully. Learning as we go and developing this side of our relationship. Communication is very strong between us and we are confident that we want to take this step together as a couple.

What I am needing is a starting point; somewhere to begin our relationship as Domme and submissive. I understand that every relationship is different and what one finds pleasurable is another's "hard no".

However, I am wondering if anyone has some suggestions of a few beginning tasks, routines, disciplines or beginner starting points for us to start with.

Just a little background info on us: We live together with a roommate and our play is kept to the bedroom only. My submissive is my "puppy" and I love to treat him as such. I prefer to be loving but have no problems being firm.

I'm not sure what other information would be helpful, but we are an open book and will answer any and all questions openly and honestly ^.^

Thanks in advance for all the ideas, suggestions and responses!

Cheers,
SIXXEN
+sin

Light bondage will probably suit you very well to start. Just get some nice, soft cotton rope from a hardware store. Maybe start with just tying his wrists together (wrap the rope many times around rather than just once; this will prevent it from digging or cutting off circulation). Or you can always tie one end to each wrist and the other to the bed frame (the metal bars under the bed that hold it off of the floor), again, wrap the rope many times around his wrist to prevent it from digging into him. Bondage can be very complicated or very simple, it's all up to you. Don't be upset if it doesn't work out how you planned right away, either. Just like anything else, it takes practice to get good at it, for both of you.

So long as you never ever leave him unattended while bound, it's pretty safe. Keep scissors handy just incase you can't get the knots out.

Did I mention don't leave him alone like that? Keep in mind he really will be helpless. If there is any kind of emergency, he will be dependent on you to set him free. And this fact will probably make you both very, very hot.

Good luck!

Starting in the bedroom- even staying bedroom only- is not the worst of ideas. Just as long as it works for you, your partner, and your relationship.

Perhaps start by looking at goals for your BDSM relationship? Do you enjoy high protocol? Certain forms of play?

If you've not filled out a BDSM checklist, that would be a good place to start. This allows you to talk through evertything together. I would suggest filling it out seperately, though, so that neither partner is feeling obligated to say yes or no to anything on it.

Or you could try a more direct interogative method.

You have a "puppy" right?

Tell your puppy to kneel (naked of course and leashed) face down with their tail high while you question him about his desires etc, only he has to stay in "puppy" mode and eaither wag his tail for a "yes he likes it" or whimper for a "no" or bark excitedly for a omg please lets do it right now etc. Add treats and such as you see fit.

Application of one's imagination can turn something normally rather dull like a booring ole run of the mill questionare or "dailey journal" into a fun and exciting two way interactive exchange of information for both of you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by denuseri

You have a "puppy" right?

Tell your puppy...

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I like the way you think.

I think Denuseri hit on something important: it's always good to add a level of playfulness to your relationship, especially if you enjoy being snuggly/sweet and only want to be firm when it is absolutely necessary. Such creativity leads to feeling more like you're in the Domme/sub roles, without making play scary or rough. My Pet particularly does not like a lot of the things I do to her because they cause pain; however, she DOES like them because they make her "feel that she has been put in her place" by Me. Does he share her sentiments? Want to be put "in his place"? Or is he simply seeking to please You? Questions, questions, questions will help Y/you both develop this new facet to your relationship.

Have fun!!