Hi from Stacey Slave

Hello Stacey . My name is Dan, and my screen name is dandom999 This e-mail is in response to your posts on bdsm library. I have no experience whatsoever in online relationships, but I thought I would browse the female sub section. About me- I am an experienced dom/master, having had relationships ranging from romantic dom/sub play, master/slave, and vanilla rough sex. I am a successful middle aged professional also in the Philadelphia area , recently finished a plain vanilla relationship , and desire to return to the insanely intense endorphin highs of domination, and to hear the wonderful sounds a women makes as I squeeze her clit from both pain and pleasure.

My general thoughts for potential submissive women -If you are new to this play, as submissive, there are certain things in seeking a dom/master. First, you must select a man who loves women. I do not mean in a physical sense, but rather a full appreciation of the female -physiology, intellectual,emotional, and spiritual. Being a sadist isn't hard, anybody can slap a girl. Understanding , or at least trying to understand how a woman's mind and body work-Being able to deliver sexual pain in such a way as to intensify a woman's pleasure, and therefore ones own pleasure, is the best of both worlds to the dom- the emotional feedback loop is maybe the most intense feeling I have ever had. And caring about and respecting ones sub makes for great aftercare- some of the best "regular" sex I ever had came out of an aftercare cuddle. Secondly , your Dom must understand you biologically. this is very important. My mentor in this was an experienced sub who explained to me that if we were going to have a successful relationship, I would have to know how, in her word to "rev her up"- she explained to me the true function and location of clit, the G-spot, the and the neurological wiring of the female sex organs. This is a pet peeve of mine. Knowing how and where to stimulate a woman is a skill that should be taught in school as part of sex ed, not left to hit and miss (pun intended).
Thirdly, in getting involved with a new dom/master, BE SAFE. Remember, HURT NOT HARM. If your dom does not understand this, leave. period

My personal approach. if a women's way to a mans heart is through his stomach, a mans way to woman's heart is through her pussy. As her sexuality is at the emotional and physic heart of a woman, so her sex organs are the center of her physical sexuality. I take physical possession of the cunt, one or two fingers up inside her and the thumb manipulating the clit and hood.Make you blow me, turn you over and take you in the ass, but keep stimulating the slit. Once it gets wet, get in deep. This allows me to inflict both pain and pleasure, and since it is one- handed, may be combined with pain/pleasure stimulation of the nipples, anus, etc. My favorite positions are dominant; for oral, a collared woman on her knees, with hands behind her back preferably tied, or doggy-style, with me on top, her ass up and head down to the bed, again with hands tied or held behind her back.

Lastly, the advantage of an older dom/master. While I have a self- interest in the question, I honestly believe that an older male dom/young female sub
is a healthy setup, providing a partner with experience in bringing a woman along through her fantasies, to overcome her mental and emotional blocks to get to the point where she can break to her inner self. Not just for a Daddy Dom/sub situation, but because a newbie needs a mentor to help turn those fantasies into a reality, and feel safe whist doing so. Plus, it's fun.

In rereading what I just wrote, it seems I focus more on the relationship than the physical side of things. That's because it is the relationship that builds the openness to share fantasies, to know your partner will protect you so you can let yourself go, and ultimately get the full impact of dominant/ submissive sex. So if you would like lets chat and see what happens. good luck Dan