The Viewpoint

I have had to give up reading several stories because the author has not chosen and stuck to a viewpoint. I read stories where the author changes from first to third person and even changes tense as casually as changing his/her underwear.
The sort of thing I mean… “You walk towards me. I see you carrying the whip casually by your side then I feel the pain as it lashes my legs. She felt the excitement grow as she saw the red welts appear on his milky thighs. She was intoxicated by the power she wielded over him. I cower as I see the delight in your eyes and fear what is to come.” (I made this up - it is not from anybody’s story.)
Do others also find this distressing?
There are advantages and disadvantages with any viewpoint. The first person provides more immediacy but it is much more difficult to portray what other people are feeling or thinking. It is not because switching viewpoints is ‘cheating’ that I object to it but because it destroys the illusion of the story.
I have published two stories. These are stories I wrote many years ago and recently decided to revise. When I revised the latest one - “End Game” - I deliberately put it into the first person to see how difficult it is to show the feelings of characters other than the narrator. I would welcome comments on my efforts.

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Originally Posted by slave48

I have had to give up reading several stories because the author has not chosen and stuck to a viewpoint. I read stories where the author changes from first to third person and even changes tense as casually as changing his/her underwear.
The sort of thing I mean… “You walk towards me. I see you carrying the whip casually by your side then I feel the pain as it lashes my legs. She felt the excitement grow as she saw the red welts appear on his milky thighs. She was intoxicated by the power she wielded over him. I cower as I see the delight in your eyes and fear what is to come.” (I made this up - it is not from anybody’s story.)
Do others also find this distressing?
There are advantages and disadvantages with any viewpoint. The first person provides more immediacy but it is much more difficult to portray what other people are feeling or thinking. It is not because switching viewpoints is ‘cheating’ that I object to it but because it destroys the illusion of the story.
I have published two stories. These are stories I wrote many years ago and recently decided to revise. When I revised the latest one - “End Game” - I deliberately put it into the first person to see how difficult it is to show the feelings of characters other than the narrator. I would welcome comments on my efforts.

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Hi-

I read "End Game" and thought the tense was consistent throughout. Yes, you are right.... picking the right viewpoint is critical to presenting a high-quality story and keeping the reader engaged.

The perfect solution is to write in third person omnicient... AKA "The God POV." Unfortunately, this is a difficult mode to write in straight away. In my first effort, a story called "Losers Bluff" AKA "Insurance," I found a way to achieve this in the first person by creating four principle characters (it's important to keep the priniciples to a minimum) and having them each relate a small scene, alternating them frequently. You can also get a neat "overlap" effect with this technique. For instance, start one scene from the viewpoint of the Dom, then switch to the sub's POV after noting the change with an appropriate section header. I can send a piece of LB if you are interested.

In the story I'm currently writing ("Dictator's Claw") I took the plunge into third-person omnicient, and --- I must confess --- I like it even more than first person. Even in this mode, though, it helps to have a dominating character per scene. It's far cooler than first person-only, I think, because you can take occasional plunges into the heads of other characters, as long as you remember that you are NOT them. To do this, just add periodic allusions to this, as in "she thought," etc. I think it's even possible, in this manner, to quote what a character would be thinking verbatim --- like internal dialogue --- though I find that this is so intensely personal that it only works with the dominating character (I don't mean the the character has to be a Dom - ha!).

Anyway, interesting topic!

Good luck to you,

GD

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Originally Posted by slave48

I have had to give up reading several stories because the author has not chosen and stuck to a viewpoint. I read stories where the author changes from first to third person and even changes tense as casually as changing his/her underwear.

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Oh, I hate this! Maybe it's meant to be clever, but it looks illiterate to me. Like you, I just give up.

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Originally Posted by slave48

It is not because switching viewpoints is ‘cheating’ that I object to it but because it destroys the illusion of the story.

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It doesn't have to, but it has to be clearly structured. I'm writing a long story at the moment which switches between the Dom and the sub's voices, but each change is a new chapter and is headed with the character's name. They also have very different "tones", one literary and educated, the other stream of consciousness with a limited vocabulary and lots of slang, so even if you missed the header you can tell who it is. It's when the reader thinks "Hang on, who's talking now?" that it breaks the spell.

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Originally Posted by slave48

When I revised the latest one - “End Game” - I deliberately put it into the first person to see how difficult it is to show the feelings of characters other than the narrator.

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Yes, though it can be interesting to show how the narrator knows - or doesn't know - what the other characters are feeling.

Hmm.. interesting point. It always annoys me too.

The need to switch perspectives between people makes it easy and interesting to find out about what is going through the minds of all involved. However; when the person switches constantly without warning.. well you get the idea they didnt read it through when they were doing it :p So if writers want to change perspective i think something like ~Now from ......'s point of view~ is needed to make it clear.
Not just switches randomly.