Signs BDSM playtime is OVER: The cops show up!
Anyone else have any issues with their lifestyle causing police attention or neighbor/roommate complaints? Or with ignorant people expressing their intolerance to your lifestyle from a moral standpoint? How did you deal with it?
My first (and hopefully last) police encounter:
The morning after an intense scene, I'm getting out of the shower and running a bit late for my first brazillian waxing when a female cop and 2 male detectives let themselves into His house (in the shower I didn't hear their knocking). I come out nervously clutching the towel around me, and I'm asked for my ID.. they follow me back to his room to retrieve it. A box of our toys is open off to the side which I'm not sure they notice. After quite a few questions they tell me they recieved an anonymous call saying it sounded like **a young woman was being beaten** here last night (um glad you got here in time?). I explained we were just having sex (no I didn't go into detail) and that it's all totally consensual (sheesh it was just a crop). I reassure them some more after another string of questions and finally they leave me with a business card, urging me to call them if need be. Um yea nice.
We recently found out it wasn't the neighbors who called the cops, but rather his ebay-freak of a roommate. Since the incident we'd been totally quiet and only went so far as to have vanilla sex once there, saving the BDSM for my apt. Nevertheless, my Dom was just given 30 days notice from the roommate (the only one on the lease there). I'm aggravated because the roommate never asked us to tone it down or even mention he heard anything (there is also a closet plus a bathroom between his bedroom and my Doms), instead he just told him to move out with no warning after we obviously demonstrated that we wouldn't make any more noise there.
*sigh* It is obvious his roommate merely has a moral issue with our lifestyle. It's for the best though because now he's moving to a place where we can make all the noise we want.
Another sign... you have to go to the hospital
About a month ago I was in the bathroom playing with myself. Both my kidsweretaking naps, and i got out my toys. I started off with three two quart cold water enemas, and once i got myself cleaned out I got out my dildo and pushed it up my anus. I had my velcro collar on, and my leash was hooked to the shower curtain rail, and my imaginary master was standing over me, holding the leash and telling me to 'get that dildo up your ass now, cunt! Fuck it in there.' and i was doing it, and imagining myself begging my master not to make me do it when suddenly the dildo left my hands and went up inside. Completely. I tried to feel for it with my fingers...nothing. Nada. I sat on the toilet and tried for an hour to push it out, then gave up and called my husband. He was HORRIFIED! He's completely vanilla, and a lot of the things i do to myself make him shudder...which is why i don't do them when he's home. Anyway, he came home and took me to the emergency room...and some of the looks we both were getting from the nurses...! The male nurses were snickering and cracking ass jokes when they thought we couldn't hear; and the female ones were eyeing up my hubby and making jokes about his size too. They took X-Rays of my toy in my ass (that got a lot of airtime in the ER; they were passing it around to look at like a tray of hors d'oevres at a party! Hubby forbade me to do that ever again, and he told the doctor to get rid of my dildo after they got it out. He didn't want me to have it again.
So playtime with my ass is OVER.
Maturity and responsibility
Well, I've always considered myself as somewhat of a child at heart; maturity, I am pleased and proud to say, only affects my other persona as a mother and a wife. It does not apply to what happens in my soul. Which is a good thing; maturity would affect my writing style, especially when I'm writing silly stories, and I'm an author by trade.
Responsibility: yes. I should have been a little more responsible about how far I put Bruce (that was my dildo's name) up the back. Believe me, I received an extensive lecture about it after I got home with a sore anal ring from having it dilated in order to get Bruce out. And then another extensive lecture when we started getting the bills in from the hospital, the ER doctor, the X-Ray techs, the blood test techs, the anesthesiologists, etc. I will never live that down.
However, as I have only just started experimenting with the rear entrance my lack of understanding about what should and shouldn't be used is regrettably scanty. Though this site's forums are going quite a long way towards improving my understanding of the logistics necessary to consider when using my rectal opening as a point of ingress for a foreign object.
Which is why we all are here; to learn, both from each other and from ourselves, because in the process of baring one's soul to a public forum you also bare the soul to one's self. So yes, honesty, frankness, and directness are a necessary part of any reply posted here, to whatever topic.
However, there is a way to ameliorate directness and frankness with a measure of delicacy, which seemed to have been missing in one of the previous posts in this thread. Criticism is all very well; as a writer I have to take criticism or I won't improve. However, rudeness is also counterproductive toward the goal of getting the person to whom you're addressing the comment to pay attention to what you have to say. And I'm uncertain as to how old the said person might be; but the last time I looked, 25 wasn't considered a 'kid' unless you were at least twice that old.
And now, as a writer/editor, I am going to have a little fun...
Paragraph 1: insert a comma after the word 'sentences' and before the word 'nor'. The correct spelling of 'coleric' is 'choleric'.
Paragraph 2: "I am direct and frank because unfortunately I seem to have overestimated some part of this audience." 'part' indicates an individual/singular, and 'audience' implies a number of individuals. Therefore, in order to be gramatically correct, it shoud read, "...I seem to have overestimated some members of this audience."
Paragraph 3: "Here we can't be as direct as among adults, here we applaud everyone for every thing they do, be it stupid." It should read, "Here we can't be as direct as though we were among adults, here we applaud eneryone for everything they do, even if it's stupid." And you're also missing a period at the end of that paragraph.
Paragraph 4: "And yeah, dicktracy writes flawlessly, playing next to your room mate's room is mature and entirely inserting a plug w/o retaing it is brilliant. Kudos to all. Happy?" Leaving aside the slang term 'yeah', the rest of the sentence should read, "Playing next to your roommate's room is mature, and entirely inserting a plug w/o retaining it is brilliant."
And you responded to the original post, read it through, and decided to post to this thread, so you've opened yourself up to evaluations of your situation. And I think the word you were looking for, in your earlier post, was 'dumbass!' Believe me, I have thought the same word to myself many times since the incident happened, most usually while I was writing the checks out for those bills. So you may say it. However, a smiley icon beside that post would assure me that you are saying it in a humorous yet instructive manner, so offense will not be taken.
And about your criticism of other people's mistakes in writing/posting their comments; 'Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.' You are not perfect, not by any means, as I've just demonstrated; neither am I. Therefore, let's stop the mudslinging.
Let's get back on topic, shall we, everybody?
Another sign BDSM playtime is over:
My hbby recently found out I give a much better blowjob while I'm restrained and /or being spanked while I do it.
He decided for his birthday (just this past week) that he wanted a blowjob, and sex, outside. So we waited for dark to fall (we have a chainlink fence, not wood board, so anyone could walk by and look, which is why we waited till dark.) Then we went outside, he tied me to a tree using my collar and leash, and i went down on all fours sucking on him while he smacked my ass gently with a belt.
I felt the first bugbite on my hip, but I ignored it in favor of what we were doing. Bad idea. By the time hubby and I got in, we had mosquito bites all over, and mine seemed to be concentrated around my pussy/inner thighs, and my ass. And the next day his parents took us out for lunch, and while we're sitting in the restaurant I'm having a hard time keeping still because my crotch and ass are itching like crazy! And we also live in an area where there are confirmed West Nile Virus cases, so there was an added worry.
My sign playtime was over...or at least should have been moved indoors, was that first bite. As it was, we didn't go in until all the mosquitos in the neighborhood had drank their fill at the all-the-human-you-can-eat-buffet. and I'm still paying for it in itchies!
who the hell is this "514" person???
Did anyone bother to point out that in his first post that he misspelled responsibility?
Back to the original topic...my sister is a doctor and has many great stories of "extractions" from the anus. A dildoe is one of the less surprising ones. I would only suggest to the original posting member to stick to the ones with balls attached. They help prevent this type of problem! (Unless you push really really hard!)
