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What was the first BDSM act you phyiscally did. I am interested because as a newb I haven't done anything. Did you do it with someone else, or were you on your own. Or maybe it was an o/l relationship? I am looking for ideas of stuff I might be able to try on my own, and get an idea of what a good place to start is?
So yeah, so what was the first BDSM activity you did?
i did self bondage before i told any of my partners what i was into, it wasnt till 4 years ago i started getting serious with my now husband
hmm...this is quite hard. is taking off my belt and whipping a girl who went to my sister school in high school on the train we rode my first act when I didnt even know what bondage was truly at the time? (she was btw heavily into bondage and I didnt know it at the time, but I felt it was ok to do for some reason...and she loved it) if not then, it would have to be tying up and training my ex a few years ago
My very first relationship where I actually had sex- just straight up handcuffs. Does that even count as BDSM anymore? lol
uhm, i experimented with self bondage for a while, clothes pegs and what not, but the first activity--you know, with another person-- was a spanking, penetration whilst tied up with some random scarves and gagged. *nods* yup, i think that's it.
I guess for me things really started the nite i saw my owner and his wife in a club downtown in the city where i was going to nursie nurse school, i was very intrigued by the collar and leash she had on not to mention the handcuffs, (it was a goth-industrial rave bar so her attire wasnt so out of place, i ran in to her needing help in the bathroom later that nite (her hands were cuffed behind her back) and gave her a hand after which i was invited back to thier booth, we had a great time, and i ended up going home with them for a nitecap, it was the start of a wonderful relationship with them
Want did we do that night you may ask?
blushes
Does having my ankles tied over my head to thier headboard and being fully and roughly used in ways I didnt know were possible at the time count?
Wrestling, being pinned, and subsequently groped by my then boyfriend. He happened to be a 2nd degree black belt at the time and I was a lowly yellow belt. I feel he had a distinct advantage.
I still loved it.
The first thing I physically did was a binding my hands and a friend of mine giving me a spanking. If that even counts? It sounds awful now, but I was just a kid. Maybe about 10? I knew I liked spankings but this was all I knew about back then. It wasn't until 14 I met my first o/l Dom and got more into things.
First was probably playing Cowboys and indians before I knew why that was such a rush.
Handcuffs with a girl when I was something like 16 or so and then I was labeled wayyy kinky by her :p. She did however get off on it so..and so did I.
I was all alone, and very young. It was so long ago now I honestly can not remember if it was self bondage or clothes pins.
The first time I felt really "daring" I went to school and while wearing hair clips on my nipples under my bra.
i found handcuffs in my Husband night stand and ask if He would use them on me...Is also how i got started *winks.
I talked my now ex-husband into tying me up during sex. He hated it. I loved it. I was hooked. That was followed by another 7 years of totally non-kinky sex, with me trying to spice things up constantly. When we split the first thing I did was go right out and find me a Dom who was more than happy to do all the kinky things I love! Now, our first night together was a highly invigorating rape scene. *eyes glaze over as i remember that night* yummmm............
Wrestling with my first real bf at 16. He ended up tied to the bed... And then later i got pay back. Nothing wild, just minor bondage and teasing, but i was hooked. I still tell him he is the ultimate corrupter :-D
i dont know what the first thing i did was its hard to remember back to early sexual experinces and when things became less vanilla but yesterday i had my first experince with a real life Dom and im as high as a kite.
hmmm the first thing? I think just getting tied up but that seemed somewhat insignifigant to me what really made me start looking around at this world was having this vanilla boyfriend where foreplay consisted of wrastling but eventually elevated to beating the snot out of each other (sometimes too far -black eyes, red faces-i once accidentally broke his nose :| poor guy lol) we had a lot of fun with it and he liked that i faught with him so hard as he usually had an easy time over powering women(though he said they never got to sexual play just tickling and stuff)
My first time was with a BF who was curious about bondage, so of course it included some very pretty (imo) rope bondage and some clamps.
That in turn made me very curious..
my first time with another person face to face was described in my recent blog entry... where my Almost-Master placed nipple clamps on me and whipped me with His belt (among other things). Before that, we had played with ice and with me inflicting light pain on myself (nipple and labia pinches) through webcams. On my own... putting a belt around my neck to simulate a collar and leash and getting so turned on by the sight (and yes, i do realize how dangerous that was, and have since been forbidden to do anything of the sort as part of my rules), clothespins on nipples ... but there truly is such a difference between self-inflicted pain, and that which comes from Another's hand.
What I consider to be my first BDSM act was with my now-Master as he was testing my pain tolerance with me on his St Andrew's cross. He brought out each of his crops, paddles, and floggers, and I got to experience them all...
Well the first things I did was self spanking, which I still do now from time to time actually. I moved on to other self done things. The first time I did anything kinky with someone was with a girlfriend. It was my birthday and she gave me a bday spanking. It started out playful but she saw that I was enjoying it and one thing led to another and I was naked and being spanked hard. It was actually rather unbelievable because it was so unexpected.
I guess it was getting spanked by a guy I slept with in high school.
well my first consensual bdsm experience with another person was about 2 years ago when a vanilla relationship got a little bit more interesting when a tie i had bought to use as a blindfold ended up being used to tie me up intead :-) the night included a lot of teeth, quite a bit of smacking/spanking, and some really nice rough fucking.
I was VERY young when I found my fascination. It was by accident, or instinct, I'm not sure which. I was masturbating and without thinking reached up and pinched a nipple. Electrically amazing! Shortly after that I discovered clothes pins, and they remain a favorite.
After H.S. and before I went into te Air Force, made a sad attempt at bondage with my then Girlfriend. She mentioned a curiousity, so I tried to tie her up. Impromptu, Spontaneous, and sad. lol
She broke up with me while I was in training for the USAF. Worked out though, while in Tech School, found a real Domme (classmate) who helped me through, and got me completely hooked on BDSM and being a sub. Vanilla has never been good enough since.
I experimented with tying up my now exhusband, I didnt realize that it was considered bdsm, just thought of it as fun.
My first knowing act of bdsm was cyber Domming, or play , he was a sub who was made to kiss my boots and I rode him around like a pony, smacking him with my crop.
My first act as a sub, putting a clothes peg on my tongue for 5 minutes, wow that hurt.
i met my my first Dom online at another site. after talking (and doing tasks such as writing for him) via e-mails and then the phone for several months, i finally got the nerve to met him in rl. during our phone conversations he would have me masturbate for him and cum only when he gave permission. when we finally met( and after some time getting to just talk in person) he forced me to have orgasm after orgasm using a vibrator. i don't know if that even counts as BDSM, but god that man could make me cum with just his voice, before we parted ways a year or so later.
to answer the rest of your question, a good place to start is certainly by yourself with things you enjoy! it usually takes a good long time to get comfortable with someone you meet online or in rl to do these other things. but when you do, and its the right person it is well worth it:)
Not straight-up BDSM, but I have very fond memories of my Convent school days when I challenged a friend of mine to tie me up and tickle me (clothed, of course!), to see how long I could last before I started begging for her to stop. :)
I am not sure if this counts as it was not sexual and I did not like it. But an early boyfriend and I were at a party. He got mad at me and spanked me in front of everyone. They were shocked and scattered. I was mad and cried. But by morning it was as if nothing had happened, we never talked about it and broke up soon afterward. The rest is history.
hog tied with a boot lace, gaged with a belt and sucked off squealing in discomfort left soaked and spattered on all the while being whipped if you can picture it.
the first thing done to me by my trainer helped me learn so much and really taught me full submission and how to let go. I was tied to the bed so i was very comfortable, and over the course of 5 days i was made to be penetrated repeatedly for 20 hrs a day, and allowed to sleep 4. My masters whole bdsm community gathered for this, to break me in and hopefully to start the breeding process. It really helped me be strong, and learn how to submit completely.
Being choked and tickled mercilessly by a guy that I was sorta kinda seeing. After that, I constantly wanted more, but he wasn't into any of that and then we stopped hooking up.
Well I suppose it started the first time I said "I'm thirsty" and he flew to his feet and asked me what I wanted, so eager to serve, did that for months and I was always afraid he'd wear out- ha!
The first sexual thing I guess would be when he begged me to sit on his face with my bare ass and suffocate him until he couldn't take it, I believe the sentence he said was "drown me in your cum." *Eyes half closed with nostalgia*
Hmmm...
When I was a little girl, I had a friend who would want to watch me every time I peed when I'd be at her house to play - she'd make me spread my legs, and she even touched the stream a time or two. I was pretty submissive as a child, so I didn't really think anything of it.
The first purely bdsm sexual experience was with my first lover. She would make me sit on her face, and she'd claw and heave, but she'd beg me not to get up until she slapped my ass...but that's relatively tame, I guess. It got more intense, and strangely, less pleasant for me as time passed.