fetishdj do you think there is any relation to me having recovered from a dissociative spectrum disorder? i was on the ptsd continuum somewhere for most of my life...maybe that can assist me slipping in so deeply? i don't exactly know when i am in it either except that when play time is over and Master has me clean up the mess i realize that i am not right. unless i get the shakes, which is hard not to notice![]()