Discipline Exercises

[Mr.FixIt]

My sub and I are fairly new to the D/s lifestyle change. We originally approached it almost as role play, but we take it much more seriously now. I'm looking for some creative discipline exercises to try out, but most of the websites I have searched have been really cheesy. Does anyone have any advice?

[stripedangel]

If you all pretend he didn't ask, you dont have to answer....................shhhhhhh

[GS42]

Sorry stripedangel...

Well, as always, there are several options. In my mind, I have catagorised 'punishment' roughly into three seperate groups, which are a) corporal punishment, b) tedious tasks and c) taking away privilage.

Because of the way you ask, I doubt whether my group A is what you meant. Of course, by 'exercises' you could mean just that, and tiring out can be good discipline. Any exercise will do, but I'd suggest something enjoyable to watch; naked jump-roping perhaps?

Some examples of tedious tasks could be doing all laundry by hand (could be regarded as taking away the privilage to use the machine, hence my 'rougly' ), cleaning the toilet using a toothbrush or writing lines or even sitting in a corner. These are also pretty 'cheesy', as you say, but you should know what your sub hates to do and use it.

Taking away privilage is, I think, the most effective (and harsh) way to discipline. You could for example prohibit sleeping in a bed (or using any other furniture), or only allow your sub to shower with cold water. (The way I see, even allowing a sub to serve sexually is a privilage.) Again, you should know what is suitable when. These privilages can be earned back; it really stimulates good behaviour. * grin*

Whatever you decide to do, make sure there is a clear difference between normal serving/housework and discipline. Punishment only works if it is perfectly clear why it's being handed out, if it's done consistenly and has clear goals.

[casie1124]

There are various forms of punishment. It would be easier to answer your question if I knew the punishments you considered "cheesy".


Casie

[gemmy]

There are Many posts on this topic Mr. Fix It and it would seem the bottom line is always....Whatever works for both of you

It has to work with your individual turn ons and offs and what exactly you are trying to teach with the discipline.

[stripedangel]

Wow, THANKSALOT y'allllllll.....Casie, He's open to anything. He listens and considers before making decisions. Surprisingly, He is pretty cheesy, too!

[stripedangel]

BTW that was indeed sarcasm!

[Warbaby1943]

My sub and I are fairly new to the D/s lifestyle change. We originally approached it almost as role play, but we take it much more seriously now. I'm looking for some creative discipline exercises to try out, but most of the websites I have searched have been really cheesy. Does anyone have any advice?

try this one. You may like it
http://www.bcwsd.com/backroom/librar...slavepos.shtml

[Mr.FixIt]

To clarify:

By exercises I do not mean aerobics, and I think that aerobic exercise would be too demeaning and does not reflect the type of discipline that my sub deserves. Humiliation is not my cup of tea at this point in Our relationship, although I realize that humiliation can be effective for some Doms and subs.

I have a semi-full drawer of spanking and bondage implements and use them both frequently in necessary corrective discipline and in play. By "exercises" I mean: a new means of stretching boundaries.

To give an example, I am considering non-permanent piercing, imposed by me, (permanent piercings have not faired well for her, although We enjoyed the initial act). If I knew exactly what I was looking for, I guess I wouldn't be asking for advice though!

[cadence]

It's too bad you are not into humiliation, I have endless ideas for that, but then again that is what I enjoy the most.

If I understand you correctly, you are looking for somthing else to expand your ideas of corrective discipline. Are you looking for actual discipline or for ideas in expanding your play?

I myself don't understand what non-permanent peircing is. I have an idea but don't really get it.
If you could give a few more examples then I am sure that others will be able to expand and offer you more assistance with your query.

[Ozme52]

I'm big on practicing positions. Good for display. Good for "inspection"

Good for receiving punishment, play, and sex.

[Mr.FixIt]

Temporary piercing (I believe that I just coined the phrase myself unless anyone can prove me wrong!--I've already been wrong twice this month and I've met my quota!) is the practice of piercing without the jewelry-- piercing of a nipple, labia, sphincter, etc (needle play). Close to a year ago, We researched piercing, (I am also an aspiring tattooist), purchased a piercing kit online, and I, ritualistically, pierced Our nipples. Mine healed well, hers did not. and have since been removed. We REALLY enjoyed the initial act, but realized that her body would not accept the permanent adornments, but we have strongly considered further piercings of her body without the jewlery which would result in the enjoyment of the initial act of piercing, yet the healing process would be much faster. I don't think that I need to explain in much greater detail to you all how much she is giving me by submitting to my control with this act. This, to me, is an exercise--a stretching of limits and boundaries.

[Ozme52]

Temporary piercing (I believe that I just coined the phrase myself unless anyone can prove me wrong!--I've already been wrong twice this month and I've met my quota!) is the practice of piercing without the jewelry-- piercing of a nipple, labia, sphincter, etc (needle play). Close to a year ago, We researched piercing, (I am also an aspiring tattooist), purchased a piercing kit online, and I, ritualistically, pierced Our nipples. Mine healed well, hers did not. and have since been removed. We REALLY enjoyed the initial act, but realized that her body would not accept the permanent adornments, but we have strongly considered further piercings of her body without the jewlery which would result in the enjoyment of the initial act of piercing, yet the healing process would be much faster. I don't think that I need to explain in much greater detail to you all how much she is giving me by submitting to my control with this act. This, to me, is an exercise--a stretching of limits and boundaries.

Sorry... there are about 441,000 references to 'temporary piercing' on the net. It's also known as 'play piercing'... for which there are 574,000 references.

[GS42]

OK, seems like I completely misunderstood your intentions in my earlier post, but I wasn't the only one...

The way I understand now, you're looking for trust exercises - not discipline - to find limits and expand on them. If it was difficult to think of corrective discipline for someone you do not know, thinking of excercises in trust for them is nearly impossible.

You need to know about boundaries of a person before you can even start to think of stretching them. What they all have in common though, is taking an area which is important to your sub and asking for control over it. It could be as simple as cutting her hair (if you're any good, of course...), but your piercing example also fits the bill. These both give you control over her body, for which a lot of trust is needed.

You need to identify the area's in which you wish to expand. Should she have trouble with intimacy, maybe have a nice, romantic dinner together with her blindfolded, where you just feed her lovingly. If there are any toys/kinds of pain she is afraid of, you could slowly start to use those in play, trying to make it feel good. Make sure you are always prepared for anything when stretching limits, by the way. You need to show that you are in control at all times.

This of course works the other way around also. If she knows something to be really important to you, you can show trust by allowing her control over it. This kind of exchange reinforces bonds between people. Be careful though, if anything goes wrong it goes wrong badly.

I hope now at least I understood your question.

[casie1124]

As far as piercings that are temporary go, if you feel you have the experience I suggest the corset piercings, they are incredibly attractive, temporary, and hurt like hell. Do the piercing thread some ribbon through them and enjoy the very erotic look of them....YUM

[DowntownAmber]

I'm big on practicing positions. Good for display. Good for "inspection"

Good for receiving punishment, play, and sex.

If it was you that put this bug in J's ear then, Oz, you're in trouble when I see you this summer... I will cast upon you my most stern look of disdain... *g*

FixIt, all kidding to Oz aside, I do have to say the practice of positions works marvelously for J and I. They're good for all sorts of scenarios.

[Warbaby1943]

I do have to say the practice of positions works marvelously for J and I. They're good for all sorts of scenarios.

My link above pointed to some of them.

[Mr. Francesco]

Hello MrFixIt:

Maybe you could make her get tattoos that say "HIS" on a part of her body, or maybe a picture of you, but not permanently, just with henna or something like that.

Mr. Francesco

[cadence]

How about expanding on the position exercises and make your submissive be part of the furniture.
Have her be a footstool for an hour.

[Mr.FixIt]

Hello MrFixIt:

Maybe you could make her get tattoos that say "HIS" on a part of her body, or maybe a picture of you, but not permanently, just with henna or something like that.

Mr. Francesco

She does wear Our mark (permanently) which symbolizes "Love Beyond Eternity". But I like the way you think.

[Mr.FixIt]

As far as piercings that are temporary go, if you feel you have the experience I suggest the corset piercings, they are incredibly attractive, temporary, and hurt like hell. Do the piercing thread some ribbon through them and enjoy the very erotic look of them....YUM

Thanks. Now you're talking! but I'm not quite experienced enough for that...yet!

[cadence]

You're not making it easy.....so how about candle wax?
Use the pillar candles though, the more wax the merrier.
Even more effective would be to tenderize different parts of the body with a paddle or whatever you want to use, pour on the wax and then remove it later with a knife.

As I have found out, but have yet to try, there are many other interesting places on the body to drop wax on or in. I'll leave that to your imagination.

[Mr.FixIt]

We haven't gone there yet--good suggestion! We did some erotic asphyxiation work last night and that went very well. We've toyed with the subject before, (back when we were still 'nilla), but never followed all the way thorugh with it.

[Ozme52]

My link above pointed to some of them.

So they did, I didn't realize.
Thanx Wb.

Two of mine are near matches (not the numbers.)

I only use five.
1) for meditation and waiting
2) for inspection
3) for rear entries and rear inspection/punishment/play
4) for begging boons
5) for front punishment/play

All are excellent for solo practice and assisting the mindset.

[Mr.FixIt]

try this one. You may like it
http://www.bcwsd.com/backroom/librar...slavepos.shtml

Thanks for the link WB. I never thought of positioning as a discipline, but I get your drift.

[Warbaby1943]

Thanks for the link WB. I never thought of positioning as a discipline, but I get your drift.

Not only discipline but you get some very nice views and and handy positions to wield the paddle or whatever.

[jeanne]

Thanks for the link WB. I never thought of positioning as a discipline, but I get your drift.

As one who is on the 'doing' end of position practice, it is a very good tool to instill discipline and the mindset to strive always to be a little more. I have 'length of time' goals that I'm working towards, and 2 of the positions I practice are physically straining! I haven't yet met His goal for those two.

[donriser]

It's funny, when i read your question at first, I thought of discipline as in ways we add structure and discipline to our lives or our D/s relationships - I didn't think of it as punishment. So easy to cross the two ideas, especially in western culture where often discipline feels like punishment and punishment is used to instill discipline - and in BDSM culture where the same activity can be used either as discipline or punishment with a very different feel and outcome based on its purpose (could make for a good discussion thread).

I'm still unsure of exactly what you're asking so I'll throw my two cents in the mix here and maybe it will land somewhere near the mark.

I'd echo the positions training that was already mentioned, but add in other types of rituals too like the use of mantras or setting rules around activities (like asking permission for basic needs/wants). Maybe look at an activities list to get ideas too. So many activities can be used to expand limits and tweeked to be used in a manner that adds the element of establishing discipline.

I'm fairly new to all this so I don't speak with great confidence in what I shared, but trying to get more involved and add what I have learned / am learning. Hope it helps.

[Mr.FixIt]

You're not making it easy.....so how about candle wax?
Use the pillar candles though, the more wax the merrier.
Even more effective would be to tenderize different parts of the body with a paddle or whatever you want to use, pour on the wax and then remove it later with a knife.

As I have found out, but have yet to try, there are many other interesting places on the body to drop wax on or in. I'll leave that to your imagination.

I am not in the practice of making things easy! Thanks for the suggestion!

[Mr.FixIt]

It's funny, when i read your question at first, I thought of discipline as in ways we add structure and discipline to our lives or our D/s relationships - I didn't think of it as punishment. So easy to cross the two ideas, especially in western culture where often discipline feels like punishment and punishment is used to instill discipline - and in BDSM culture where the same activity can be used either as discipline or punishment with a very different feel and outcome based on its purpose (could make for a good discussion thread).

I'm still unsure of exactly what you're asking so I'll throw my two cents in the mix here and maybe it will land somewhere near the mark.

I'd echo the positions training that was already mentioned, but add in other types of rituals too like the use of mantras or setting rules around activities (like asking permission for basic needs/wants). Maybe look at an activities list to get ideas too. So many activities can be used to expand limits and tweeked to be used in a manner that adds the element of establishing discipline.

I'm fairly new to all this so I don't speak with great confidence in what I shared, but trying to get more involved and add what I have learned / am learning. Hope it helps.

Everyday should be a learning experience. That being said, we are all, and will always be "fairly new to this" and fairly new to everything that we truly apply ourselves to. Your level of confidence is not questionable, you are well spoken and I thank you for your advice.

I have given my personal definition of "exercises" so now that it has come into question, I suppose that I should give my personal definition of discipline. The following is the definition of discipline according to dictionary.com:

dis·ci·pline Pronunciation[dis-uh-plin]–noun
1. training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline.
2. activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training: A daily stint at the typewriter is excellent discipline for a writer.
3. punishment inflicted by way of correction and training.
4. the rigor or training effect of experience, adversity, etc.: the harsh discipline of poverty.
5. behavior in accord with rules of conduct; behavior and order maintained by training and control: good discipline in an army.
6. a set or system of rules and regulations.
7. Ecclesiastical. the system of government regulating the practice of a church as distinguished from its doctrine.
8. an instrument of punishment, esp. a whip or scourge, used in the practice of self-mortification or as an instrument of chastisement in certain religious communities.
9. a branch of instruction or learning: the disciplines of history and economics.
–verb (used with object) 10. to train by instruction and exercise; drill.
11. to bring to a state of order and obedience by training and control.
12. to punish or penalize in order to train and control; correct; chastise.

My military service taught me that discipline is more of a self-control issue rather than an imposed subject--But that doesn't work for everyone, otherwise subbies would not need Doms and the world would come to an end! As a supervisor in my workplace, discipline is a means of correcting an undesired behavior for the benefit of the Agency. To me, if discipline is about self-control and correction of undesired behaviors, discipline is not a "punishment". Punishment, to me, is a much more severe and imposed matter. I hope that this clarifies your understanding of my use and intent of the phrase "discipline" in my original post.

Regarding your suggestion of setting rules: I created a new one today, just prior to reading your post--she must ask permission to masturbate, even when I am at work (via text message).

And, I agree, Discipline vs. Punishment would make an interesting thread subject.

Now it's your turn to explain--What do you mean by "mantras"?