Have you found a story in the library that turns you on that you can share with him? He may not have any idea what sort of things (other than holding you down) that would be all right for him to do. Perhaps show him a catalog of toys, too, to give him ideas.

The big thing here is to keep talking--don't wait for him to bring it up. You've got to communicate your needs and listen to him, as well. He may not be able to give you all you desire and you won't find out without clear and honest communication.

Good luck as you move forward.