Like said before, I didn't and don't want to "hijack" this thread. But, there IS something I have to say right here.
Yes, I did ask thrall to look at "the" post, that first one. Because I was soooo insecure about doing it, in fact removing it after the first response. Because she indeed was always there before...always listening (and believe me, I can ramble)
I cannot describe just how confused, insecure, sad, angry and hurting I was at that moment....one part of me still thinking I was or should be done with "it" the other part feeling the lava rising. ..
She has however that magic way with words - and people at that.
Thinking back it were her words, as always the right words at the right moment in the right way, the obvious care, concern and yes, no doubt recognition in them that helped me to share over here, that helped me to stop fighting myself... When I look at it, especially that post where she ask me to tell what "it" is....I still cry...but they are happy tears..
So...I want to say right here: thrall, thank you so much, I owe your for this, big time.