It has to be mutual. No Dom that I am aware of does this for another person's benefit, they do it for thier own benefit because they enjoy the feeling of power they have over another. Equally, no sub would submit to another Dom purely for the Dom's benefit. They have to enjoy it otherwise they would not do it.

Trying to force or persuade another that they would enjoy a lifestyle is actually more likely to cause them to back away from that lifestyle. The more you push, the harder you push them away. UNless they are already into this sort of thing (which is possible because we hardly advertise so in theory it would be possible for two BDSMers to be in a relationship without realising that they have this in common...) or have an interest and willingness to explore with you then you are likely to shoot yourself in the foot.

Sometimes, with men, the issue is harming the woman they love (or giving up the alpha male position if it is a Femdomme set up). With the former you have to start with small steps and work up in very slow degrees. I've found that spanking and light bondage (the sort of fun 'tie me up with those dressing gown cords and spank my bottom' play that many vanillas indulge in without considering themselves kinky) is a good place to start. Show him how you enjoy that, how that makes it easier for you to orgasm. Once he makes that link between the slightly kinky things and your enjoyment (and, if being cynical, how much less time he has to spend ensuring you have an orgasm because, you know, you women can spend hours on that and we often get bored ) then the rest should follow. But the slow degrees are needed to ensure he does not get scared away. Greeting him at the front door wearing nothing but a leather hood and kneeling to present him the crop and telling him his dinner will be ready in 10 minutes may sound like a sexy idea to you but, coming out of the blue, may be a little scary