So here is one for the sexual health experts, that I hope might be able to offer some advice. For a long time I've been single and regularly (2-3 times a day) masturbated, often to BDSM porn (including stories in the story section).

Recently I met a girl who enjoys only mild BDSM elements (no pain, no humiliation, few toys, restraint and power exchange OK) and I've discovered that I cannot ejaculate when having sex or recieving hand or oral pleasure from her.

Now while that has some advantages (more sexual stamina) it is increasingly frustrating as she comes nearly at my slightest touch and I havent had one yet. That said, I seem to have 'dry' ejaculations where my penis pulsates as if it were cumming, but no ejaculate actually appears. And it doesnt quite feel as good or authentic as a proper ejaculate.

From a brief search of the internet, the consensus seems to be that this might be due to stress, inability to relax with the partner, or due to maturbatory conditioning of the ejaculation reflex. I can totally relax with her, stress is low, so my question is how to break my bodies conditioning and learn how to ejaculate while having sex with her?

Thx.

V.