Quote Originally Posted by kaizokuj View Post
Hi, I'm pretty new here but I wanted to make a post and just ask some stuff.
I have most of my adolescent/"adult" life (I'm 23 so not that old..) thought about dominating a girl.
I imagined lots of things I'd do and lots of things I would make her do.

But recently I found out that I also have a pretty serious submissive side.
For the last few months my best friend and I have been in a sort of dom/sub relationship, however I think she/he doesnt really want to take it as serious as I would like to.
Recently some stuff happened and I had to face that I'm submissive too and that has left me feeling a little confused about who I am in that respect so I was hoping that maybe I could get some advice on how to deal with these feelings..

After realizing that I am, I am left wondering stuff that I cant answer anymore, like if the things I imagined doing I was really hoping them done to me?
Since I have no experience in being a dom maybe it was a fabrication of my mind to keep me from realizing I want to be dominated..
Have you had any thougths like these?
Also recently I have really felt like I want a proper mistress or a sub to play with myself.. How do I deal with the desire?
Not trying to be flippant, but you deal with it like you do with any other desire, you try to get your needs met.

If you have fantised about dominating someone for a long time, I think you can be pretty certain that that need is real, but there really is no other way than to try it out. Try out both roles, see if they are both for real. Reading is definitly a good idea, but after that, you have to try and see how it feels. You cannot think that one out.

It is completely normal to have both sides, and from my own experience I know that they can sort of see-saw. There are all kinds of ratios and ways.

Good luck on your journey :-)