I was reading an experienced Dominant's thoughts on the ethics involved in playing with someone new to BDSM.
I never even considered that there would be an ethical question that arises and have spent a few weeks mulling it over.

Consent is the the most imortant thing to consider. Can someone who has no real incling (and can't have it either because of lack of experience)of the deep emotional intamacy that can come from a submitting, truly give their consent? Even warning them of this connection cannot prepare them for the New Relationship Energy (NRE or as some call it sub-frenzy) that can and in most cases does occur.
So, if they can't understand the implications, how can they truly consent?

Also, if You ~do~ go ahead an play with a newbie, do You teach him/her kneel, or collar his/her during play, or any number of those things Doms let us do(and we Love having done to us) knowing how powerful those symbols of submission are. Again, the question of truly being able to give consent of something they cannot have a true understanding of.

On the other hand, all of U/us were new at some stage and someone taught us.

How do You approach the negotiations with a newbie? Is it in any way different to negotiating with an experienced submissive?
Do You have Your own guideline of what You will and won't expose a total newbie to in the first few months?
Do You discuss sub-frenzy with him/her before playing? Or before embarking on a new relationship?


I often hear the stories of some sub's first experiences and it seems a heart-breaking parting of ways is almost par for the course. Could it be because these things aren't discussed or (heaven forbid) considered by the Dominant?

Many thoughts...perhaps jumbled.
I would appreciate any insight.