I definitely see no contradiction in that, as that is how I am too.
What was strange for me is his insistence that his preference is the 'strong, independent' woman. Yet he seemed determined to not consider or treat me as such - at least all the time I wasn't calling him up on it. I think a lot of the time people think they want something that they don't, it would seem.
Thank you for your advice I certainly hope so. I definitely have realised through this how important it is to feel like the other person wants to acknowledge all sides to me... not just the side that flatters the Dom's ego. It was a very strange feeling to have someone talking at me in such a way as to basically tell me how to be confident... whilst in a way criticising me for "not being confident" and pointing out the ways that I come across to him as not and how I could improve it. As if making criticisms/suggestions builds someone up and adds to their confidence, anyway. It was strange. I remember wondering why this was a conversation we were even having because, even if I were actually lacking in confidence, no one gains confidence from such a conversation *anyway*.
I do believe that he did have my best intentions at heart, for sure. I just think he completely got me wrong and also was getting a bit confused about his role as a Dom.