It appears i have offended you once again.
First: if you are referring to the question about What a Trainer is? Then yes, i am absolutely guilty of being confused as i am new at this and still learning and was trying to figure out the dynamics of what a Trainer actually is. that question had nothing to do with this checklist and everything to do with trying to find enough understanding so i know what the hell i am to be looking for in the first place.

Second: You should not question the value of your, or anyone else's, advice. it is because of that advice that i had enough smarts to realize a red flag when i seen one. and for that? I will Thank You again for your kind words and wisdom.

Third: I am not dwelling on it, as a matter of fact? I have more then moved on from that rediculous mess however? If i may be so bold to point out the fact that I am NOT the only newby that is joining this forum, nor am i not the only one that has these very same concerns. and i did not start this thread to gain sympathy nor get a pat on the back from others, i started it because when one is already questioning their place with no understanding of how this is suppose to work for them be it ol or rl, then perhaps in this very real area of concern they can take my story and see through your response that this is not good behavior, this is not typical, and it is not safe.
And yes, you DID make it perfectly clear that this situation was not safe and that this man was not a true Dominant, and you know what? You will now have told every damn newby that reads this thread. So again? Thank you for your response.
And lastly: If I may once again be so bold to point out the name of the thread? Red Alert Checklist, the key word here being 'Checklist' though i truly do value your opinion and i am very grateful that you have point out the wrongness of this situation, the purpose of this thread is to open the eyes of the niave and give a place where others that may have found themselves in similar situation to add to the 'Checklists' of what is right and wrong when you are up against a pretender and/or predator.
I come to this forum looking for answers, knowledge and understanding and as very sad as this is to admit? before i came to this forum and spoke to the many wonderful people here willing to help a naive beginner out? I would have thought that lovely situation was ok, maybe a little intense and yes it would have ticked me off but still? i would have thought it to be ok, and you know what else? I didn't even realize that 'Pretenders' were a thing until i came to this forum, so again? Thank you for your kind words of wisdom, both to me and to this thread as they truly did help in understanding that just because someone boasts? Does not make it true.
So again, i do sincerely apologize for offending you but i do not apologize for putting up this thread.