man the provider

[thir]

I think everyone has a number of innate desires. One of those innate desires is to make a contribution to the world: do something that has value or makes a difference to a person's family, social group, tribe, country ... whatever.

Not sure I agree here..I think most of us want a certain degree of prestige or recognition, but I believe this concept of making a contribution is an American cultural idea.

The traditional role for a man is provider. Men are on average larger, stronger and faster than women. Back when we were hunter/gathers , men did the hunting because men have, on average, characteristics that make them better hunters than women (I say "on average" because some women are stronger and faster than I am.). And for women, who have to give birth to babies, it only makes sense that while the men are out hunting, the women are looking after the house and the children. So the roles of the man being the provider and the woman looking after the home go way back and for those reasons, still persist.

Well that is one problem that I see with all this..We do not really know anything about that. There are many ways to hunt, and a lot of them do not imply being stronger. Nor is there any proof that people lived in family groups rather than tribes, indeed, I see the tribe as more likely as it is a better use of resources, and it frees non pregnant women for whatever hunting they might join in. However, although I also believe that conditions must have been very different for these tribes depending on where they lived, there seems to be a consensus that on the average gathering was 80% of the food, and I think everybody must have been engaged in that to keep things going. I think the old idea of man as early human provider is guessing and unlikely, you do not see this in animal kingdom either.

In today's world, most jobs (especially white collar jobs) don't require greater brute strength. Women and men are on a more level playing field with respect to the requirements of work. However we are told that women earn less money than men who are doing the same job. Personally I believe in equal pay for equal work. I also believe in doing the job and the role you want. I was actually a stay-at-home dad for many years. In those days I made my contribution by raising kids and looking after the house. I was interested in being a dad but not at that interested in being a "homemaker" when the kids got older. So, to continue to make a contribution I went back to work outside of the home.

Sounds reasonable to me that whoever wants to stay at home does, if at all possible.

Some men may feel like they are less than men if their wives earn more that they do. Some men may feel like they are less than men if their wives have to work at all. Some women want to be the homemaker. Some women want to make their contribution and find fulfillment by having a job outside the home.

But you apparently are not so insecure ;-) Good for you!