Looking for co-authors/ proofreaders/ reviews

I´m looking for a co-author or proofreader and opinions for this story (english is not my native language).

I left the "boring" parts out, since i have written them allready some time ago but deleted the file after some serious doubt concerning the quality and didn´t know how to go on. They were concerning the first part (see below for a synopsis of it). I could probably write them again.

I love the casual style of zack, especially
Kirsten and the moot court,
but of course i know i can´t even dream of competing with this master of the genre.

The parts i wrote are delimited by ******written****** and ******/written****** "tags".

Everything else is a short synopsis.

Story so far ( this part not written yet):

Janet is on the beach with her two sons (between 6-11 yrs - don´t worry, they don´t get involved). They bury her in the sand as usual, just a little deeper than before, so Janet isn´t able to get out by herself. Just her head is sticking from the sand.
Her female friend (Anne) comes over (as agreed) to get the kids, so Janet can have a whole weekend for herself, since her husband is away on business.
When she is about to dig her out, an ex-student (Bella) comes over to her.
"Hey, you´re Miss Shaw!"
She is a black, thin and beautiful girl in a tiny bikini of about 17. She was kicked out of school partly because of the bad grades Janet gave her in sports.
She sits uncomfortably close in front of her former teachers head sticking out of the sand, cross legged, so Janet has to strain her neck a little to look up to her.

Anne excuses herself and leaves with the kids, since she is in a hurry and Bella and Janet "obviously have some matters to discuss".

Janet tells her to dig her out, but janet evades these requests and continues their conversation about how unfair Janet had treated her.
She - subtly - insists that Janet should apologize to her.

so...

Have written the "hot" parts, should be prolonged i think.
******written******

"I apologize for how i treated you in school. Now get me the fuck out of here."

"THAT wasn´t very convincing at all."

Janet sighed. In a calm, reasonable voice she said "OK, I´m really sorry for how i treated you, honestly. Now would you please dig me out? Please?"

"Do you respect me?"

"I do respect you, Bella, really. And i did in school, i just wanted to help you with your grades."
"Much better. Now just one more, a little more personal token of your respect for me and we´re set."

"What now?" Janet asked annyoed.

Bella inched back a little on the towel and leaned back on her arms and extended her leg towards Janets face. She gently laid the light underside of her long, slim toe across Janets lips, as if to hush her.

Janet turned her head to the side. "Hey, watch your feet!"

Bella pulled her foot a little back so that her toes where about an inch in front of Janets face.

"Come on, teach, all i want is a a small believable sign of your respect."

She pointed her toe and lightly probed Janets lips with her white, unpainted toenail.

Janet leaned her head back a little.

"Bella, this is getting a little weird. I don´t know where you girls get your ideas from nowadays, but i will certainly not... " - 'suck on your toes' she thought, but even speaking this out in front of the girl would be degrading - "...do that."

"Don´t make such a big deal out of it. It´s just fun. Just a toe, and a beautiful one if i may say so. And no one´s here to see. I just want you to show me that you meant it earnest when you told me you respected me, nothing else. "

Janet struggled with herself. She desperately wanted to get out of this hole and away from Bella. Also, her words and her good-natured tone (and probably the sun that had shone unmercifully on her uncovered head for some time) had calmed her a bit. Hell, even her husband liked to dive up to her and nibble on her toes to startle her when she sat unsuspectingly on the edge of their pool with her legs in the water.

Furthermore, the sun was now really baking her and she started to feel slightly lightheaded. She really had to get this over with.

"OK then. Hurry up." She put her head back forward so that her lips were touching Bellas toenails and opened her mouth slightly.

"Do you want to show me your respect?"

Janet was now determined not to waste any more time on this beach.

"I want to show you my respect, Bella." Her lips where slightly scraping against Bellas nail as she spoke. She opened them again.

"How?"

Janet cursed inwardly. "By sucking on your toe."

"You mean on my TOES?"

That wasn´t the bargain, but it wasn´t a big difference. She swallowed an angry remark. Let this loser have her little game.

"Yes."

Bella pulled her foot back from Janets waiting, half open mouth and sat back up cross-legged.

"Oh i´m really looking forward to it!" she giggled good-naturedly an clapped her hands. She lent forward and ruffled Janets hair.

"Oh my, your head is getting hot!" she exclaimed. "I will fetch you a wet towel to put on you. Why didn´t you say something?"

Janet was speechless as Bella rose with a towel in her hand and turned to go to the water.

"Hey!" she finally said as Bella walked away.
"Stop! I´m okay. Please. Lets do this now." she exclaimed as loud as she dared, though no one was near as far as she could tell.

She leaned her head back and groaned as Bella winked at her with the towel, smiling over her shoulder.
She was back in under a minute and wrapped the wet towel around Janets head. The cooling effect was immediate, and she soon felt much better as her head cooled down quickly.

"I´ll get you a drink, too." With that she was gone again and back after a couple of minutes with a water bottle in her hands. She squatted beside Janet and, putting her hand gently but firmly on her forehead, tipped her head back and let her drink from the bottle until it was almost empty.

She felt much better physically now, almost relaxed, and a bit tired. Judging by Bellas manners, this seemed to be just a kind of prank and that she actually felt guilty towards her. Janet was positive that she wouldn´t have to "show her respect" for her anymore, be it because Bella had already forgotten it, felt guilty about it or didn´t dare to actually go through with it.

"I´ve worked up some sweat myself now. I think i´m having a quick dip in the water." Bella said.

Janet looked at her back as she left. After 10 minutes watching Bella swimming, she allowed her eyes to close. Before she knew it, she was sound asleep.

When she came back around again, she realized that the sun stood much lower now. She felt refreshed. Bella laid on her side beside her, her headphones on and reading one of Janets magazines.

She looked up as she realized Janet was awake.

"Morning, or, good evening, sleepyhead."

"What...what time is it? It must be past seven now. Come on, dig me out, i have to hurry."

"Why hurry? Your friend said that you had the house for you alone this night, if i remember correctly. And besides, there´s still this little respect thing you wanted to do for me, remember?"

So she hadn´t forgotten or abandoned her little "game". Well, she had already said she would go along, and she definitely didn´t want to go through the whole process from before again.

"Yes, i remember." she said in a neutral tone.

Bella went back to her original position, with her foot pointed half an inch in front of her mouth.

"So, say it."

Janet decided to get it perfect the first time to avoid that dumb game from before.

"I really respect you, Bella, and I want to show it to you by sucking on your toes, please."

She let Bellas long, right big toe slide into her mouth. The long toenail tickled the back of her palate a little as Bella put it all the way inside. Her second and third toe rested on Janets cheek beside the corner of her mouth. She placed her tongue on the soft underside of the digit and closed her lips around the base. It had a few stray grains of sand on it and tasted a little salty from the seawater. She could bear it. She started to suck gently on it for a few seconds, then stopped and opened her mouth a little to allow Bella to switch toes. Janet signaled with her eyes, but Bella just replied by wiggling her toe inside her oral cavity. Unable to dislodge her mouth herself, Janet could do nothing but to renew her sucking. She couldn´t keep up pretending to herself that this was just "good fun". She couldn´t keep up pretending that this wasn´t deeply humiliating and degrading. The occasional slurping sounds that escaped her lips weren´t helping, either.
******/written******

OK, interlude in short:
(continued in next post)

OK, interlude in short:

-After showing respect to giggling (female) friends (including kissing their panty-clad butts), they dig her out.

-Janet can barely move her limbs after long immobility

-put her in a sleeping bag in a tent a friend brought. She has also some duct tape in the sack for the tent, to mend holes (will be used later in the story).

-another, slightly older, friend arrives (Pat), ex student of Janet, also not one of Janets favorite pupils because of her personal hygiene. Large build, Hippy type. Had no regular boyfriend for years.

-Girls sit around a fire, hearing music and talking about sex and boys, Janet is almost forgotten, when Pat says "this talk makes her too horny, she better take a look at Miss Shaw"

-They wonder after a while talking what takes her so long when she comes out of tent after nearly an hour

-Recognizing the glassy look in her eyes and the smug grin, Bella says "Oh my god did you..."

written parts continue here
******written******
"Teach sure showed me hell lot of respect in there. Two times." she said, patting herself suggestively below her navel.

Brandy giggled with her hand in front of her mouth as Bella took the flashlight went to the tent to take a look at Janet.

"You better don´t go in there yet."

"Why that?" Bella asked suspiciously.

"Well, i was at the open-air festival for three days now, just came back two hours ago. There was no real opportunity to shower, so..." she shrugged apologetically.

Bella was almost knocked back by the scent as she opened the tent flap. A strong aroma of - Bella could only think of it as "Bitch in heat" - mixes with an almost equally strong odor of stale urine, sweat and not so subtle traces of things she didn´t want to think about.

Bella raised her eyebrows and looked back scoldingly at Pat, who shrugged again.

"I´m thoroughly clean now. every where."

Bella braced herself and into the tent, taking shallow breathers through her mouth, and let the flashlight travel along Janet. She noticed that Pat had strapped her belt around the sleeping bag above Janets elbows, obviously to make sure she couldn´t reach for the zipper to free herself. As the light reached her face, she was greeted by Janets wide eyed stare and muffled noises. Her whole face was glistening wet, and two wiry hairs, each about on and a half inches long, were sticking to her skin on her chin and cheek.
"You should trim yourself at least occasionally." she scolded Pat through the tent flap. Or wipe, she added to herself.
"Haven´t had a boyfriend since two years now, so why bother." came the reply.
A piece of duct tape was slapped over her mouth and slightly bulging cheeks. Under Janets grateful look, she began to peel the tape away with pointed fingers. She saw some yellowish garment protrude from the corner of the mouth as she was halfway through. Bella looked suspiciously at it.
"What have you put in there?" She asked loud.
"Not sure if you want to know."
Silence.
"Well, 3 days of laundry, if you like. Forgot to take spare underwear with me. I didn´t wanted to put these back on, now that I´m prim and clean again."
Bella looked at the garment again and, to Janets chagrin, slapped the tape back over her teachers mouth. Ignoring the pleading muffled sounds Janet made.
"Sorry, but i will definitely NOT touch that." she said to Janet, as if Janet was the one responsible for the ineffable dirty panties sealed into her mouth.
Bella crawled back out, but left the tent flap open to help the scent in the tent go away.

"Go, clean her up, Pat. Now that the deed is done, we others may as well have our fun, too. But i will definitely not put my privates anywhere near that mess."

"But i don´t think my panties are clean yet!"

"Then do something about it. They won´t get any cleaner just by sitting around in her mouth."

"Well, okay. Give me a few minutes. Do you have a towel?"

Brandy handed her a spare shirt.

With the shirt and a full water bottle she had brought, Pat entered the tent.

The girls watched her through the open flap as she straddled Jantes chest and grimaced as they heard the sound of the duct-tape ripped off in one swift motion.

"Don´t you dare to spite them out. Here, let me soak them a little."

"Good, now chew them. CHEW on them!"

She lifted her butt and brought it hard down on Janets chest.

"Good. Turn them around with your tongue. Good. Swallow."

The girls saw her tilting the bottle again in front of her.

"Again. You know the drill. Don´t swallow until i tell you."

"Swallow. Again." Pause. "Swallow. Now sanitize."

They saw her switch the bottles.

"OK, Swallow."

She switched the bottles again.

"Rinse. Swallow. Now suck the water out of them while i clean your face."

Pat left the tent a few minutes later, her panties - which were almost white again - proudly in her hand in front of her.

"As good as new. Both, before you ask."

The Bella and Brandy giggled at that.

Pat dropped her shorts and put the panties back on. Bellas and Brandies jaws dropped as they saw her thick, wiry bush. It looked like a horse brush. Bella felt almost pity for Janet.

Both Bella and Brandy weren´t sure how to proceed after Pat had sat back down again.

"So, what did you actually DO in there?" asked Brandy.

"Right now?"

Brandy rolled her eyes. "I already saw that. No, before."

"You really want to hear?"

"No, just asking to be polite. Come on, don´t make me beg."

"Well, at first i just wanted to make her suck my toes, like you did. When she complained that they were dirty, i got a little angry and told her that that was the point of the exercise, and not to satisfy some of her pervert wishes."

Brandy and Bella laughed at that.

"When she wouldn´t do it, i just bounced up and down on her belly - hard - until she did. My feet felt so clean and fresh afterward that i wanted to try it with my axles."

The other girls wrinkled their noses at that.

"I sat on her upper thighs and drew her upper body up by the sleeve of the sleeping bag. I felt her arms twitch, so i secured them with my belt. I just had to hit her tit once through the sleeping bag and could guide her licking mouth around my armpits by her hair as i would a shower head. I laid her back down, and my navel was next. You can´t imagine what your finger smells like when you put it in your navel after 3 hot days and..."

"We don´t want to know" Bella said sternly with a mocking expression on her face.

"OK. Anyway, this spot is rather sensitive for me, what made me think of one - or rather two - other places i would have liked to have cleaned. I tell you, i was glad you had the music so loud out here. When i dropped my shorts and panties, she went really wide-eyed and started to yell; for you, Bella, by the way. You must be her new protector for her or something. Kind of a stockholm syndrome. I dindn´t waste any time and sat down on her face to quiet her. I had really no sexual intentions before, but when you have a nose up your pussy and a clenched pair of lips pressed against your sphincter... what can i say? I had no sex for almost a year now. Besides, humiliating your old teacher felt somewhat sexy from the beginning, i have to admit. I knew this was going too far, but - well - i was already sitting on her face. So 'the deed was done', as you said, and getting off on her face wouldn´t add up that much. To make a long story short, in my current position i showed her a rather ultimate form of 'showing respect' first. The rest... you´ve seen the evidence."

"You made her eat your asshole?" asked Brandy, unbelieving.

"Inside out. And again to prepare me for my second orgasm. Try letting her nose slip into your butt when she eats your pussy, by the way. It really adds to the experience."

******/written******

Not yet written:
Brandy gets hot and goes into the tent to have her share...

Before the second part, one or two friend(s) of Bella come over, Brandy and ?. She (or they) witness the toesucking and, being one of Janets pupils herself, demand some respect, too. Brandy is one of Janets favourites, btw.