craigslist bdsm rape scandal

http://www.latimes.com/news/nation-a...454,full.story


So breakdown (for those of u too lazy to read the story :P lol )first:


So right now in my community there is a trial going on over a rape that took place
approximately a month or two ago. The reason this is contoversial is that it was solicited over Craigslist by a man, Jebadiah James Stripe, posing as his ex-girlfriend who posted an ad for rough sex, rape fantasy, etc. the man who replied to the add, Ty Mcdowell,then exchanged instant messages with Stripe whom he thought was the girl in which there was a desire for "humiliation, physical abuse, sexual abuse," (Casper Star Tribune--see above link) expressed on her/Stripes part. After about a week of emails and IM's Stripe carried out the rape brutalizing the woman by "Societal" standards and causing grear mental and expected physical harm to the woman.

Everyone in my community is mad about this crime, mad at the rapist, mad at Craigslist, and highly critical of BDSM. But I think this case is tragic in some ways. Could this have happene if Mcdowel was following SSC practices, was he following SSC practices? I don't know. If he had extensive contact with Striipe who was pretening to be this girl it is possible that he did and even set up a safe word that couldn't have been used as the girl didn't know it for obvious reasons. I think this is a goodreson to meet someone in a coffee shop or something at least once before engaging in play with them, if you do meet someone online. And please don't think I'm blamig the victim cause I'm not. If she didn't know about this, didn't request this, didn't want this that had to be horrible on her and I feel for her, even if she is into BDSM or rape fantasy or whatever if she didn't specifically set this up for herself it is nothing like the "fantasy" and she shouldn't have had to be put through it. But I think that the real person who should be first on the choping block to go to jail is that Stripe guy. He posed as another person to cause them harm and really in his selfishness caused a lot of harm (emotionally, mentally) to at least two people. But I haven't read about him being arrested, charged, or sentenced.
Finally, it ha made my opinions on societal views of BDSM change. I thought with the mainstreaming of BDSM in some movies as well as the sexual openess and curiosity in American culture right now that people were more accepting of the BDSM lifestuyle but when I expressed the slighest bit of sympothy for Mcdowell to a coworker she became disguusted and said that anny sick frek that would respond to an add by a woman asking to be raped was a sick freak and belonged in jail. *Sigh* guess its only okay to tie up pookie with ur neck tie still but only on weekend nights when the moon is full if all the curtains are closed and all the doors double bolted.

I have just used the link and read the report of the charge of rape. Ok I will be the first to admit that there are a lot of strange kinks in BDSM, and I have never classed myself as naive in any way. I know that there are women and girls that like rough sex, there are those that like being used, and I expect there are the same amount of men, and most of them if not all are in the community.

But even I am surprised at the stupidity of these two men, and both deserve all that is coming their way in the way of punishment. Stipe for his blatant disrespect of the woman’s personnel safety well being, and McDowell for his utter stupidity for not doing his homework. Stipe by soliciting a person on a chat line to carry out this rape without vetting him first, and he should be put away for life because he is more dangerous than McDowell that carried out the rape. Let’s for instance say the woman fought hard, because she clearly knew nothing about the set up, and the knife that McDowell was holding cut her jugular, we would not even be talking about this atrocity.

I say this with all respect to you charliegirlnaked, if it had been you that had been set up, by say an ex Dom/Domme, and instead of a knife held in the man’s hand, he was full of aids, would you still be eager to show sympathy towards the rapist? Rape I believe in the BDSM is done in controlled play, this was neither controlled nor was it play.

Lock both up and throw the key away just for their arrogance and stupidity.

Respects ian 2411

The only reason that I show him any sympathy is that he knew no better he was (as stupid as he may be for allowing this to happen and or lack of a better word) in a way setup. i am not saying he is not culpable for his actions and i think he shoud go to jail (it was his responsibility to make sure it wasn't a set up like this) I was saying that it appals me that nothing is being done to Stripe who caused this to happen and that people are not necessarily placing the blame on him or providing him with consequences since he did not commit the actual rape. Further more instead of blaming the people responsible for this act people are instead placing the blame instead on the sexual practices that are practiced safely, sanely, and consensually by responsible adults. I think its ridiculous to blame an activity or lifestyle instead of demanding personal accountability of the two men involved in commintting this crime.

I was saying that it appals me that nothing is being done to Stripe who caused this to happen and that people are not necessarily placing the blame on him or providing him with consequences since he did not commit the actual rape.


charliegirlnaked:

You have missread your own link, because something is being done to Stipe, he is being charged with; Conspiracy to comit first degree sexual assault.

Regards ian 2411

A situation like this is so incredibly scary to think it could happen to anyone. I feel very sorry for the woman involved.

I'd prefer not to use the term BDSM when speaking of the type of people involved in the crime described by Charlie Girl. And I do think the article that described the mess was very objective and never used the term BDSM. Which is a good thing- maybe people in general, are starting to realize that there is a difference between sexual violence and consensual sexual and emotional extremism (which is what BDSM mostly is).

Well, no matter how "exciting" the thought of acting out a rape with a stranger... it is indeed foolhardy and irresponsible to not meet first.

Even meeting an emissary, alone, is insufficient.

You have to prove to yourself, the victim is aware and willing... and if spontenaity is desired, the meeting can be arranged to not detract from that. Afterall, stranger rape is the rarest of the genre.

This is a perfect example of why a face to face meeting in a vanilla setting is essential for this lifestyle and why other elements of SSC need to be implemented at all times.

As for not calling this BDSM... I can understand why it is a bad idea to link ourselves to this but the truth is the 'rapist' was someone who had a kink for rape which, while at the extreme end of BDSM, is still within the remit - a situation where there is a loss of control, an exercise of power and a certain amount of pain and fear. What if you were equally fooled into beleiving that someone else wanted whatever kink you enjoyed? Bear in mind that the majority of BDSM activities are illegal if inflicted on an unwilling subject (frankly they are illegal even if there is consent because you cannot consent but the difference is that the consenting person rarely makes a complaint to the police) so this is a situation all of us could end up in. What stops it from happening more often are the SSC and RACK rules and the fact that we take care to make sure of ourselves before proceeding. I think we need to take this as a cautionary tale and an example as to why we should be careful...

I am with Ozme on this. Never meet a stranger for play directly. Go for a cup of coffee and a chat to see if the chemistry is right.
Plus to see if the person you chatted with is really who he/she claimed to be.

The second part that strikes me as odd is that this guy was actually dumb enough to believe a woman in her right set of mind would put up a PHOTOGRAPH of herself in an ad that asks for a "rape".
I mean - really.

While I do know that there are all sorts of fantasies in people´s minds, I very much doubt a woman who actually entertains that fantasy, and actually wants that done by a near-stranger, would put a photograph up with the ad.

That is asking for being fucked by any old someone who saw that ad, is willing, and has neither a conscience nor the tiniest bit of common sense.

And I daresay most women above the age of 15 know that, because they have met their fair share of idiots already in complete vanilla surroundings.

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Finally, it ha made my opinions on societal views of BDSM change. I thought with the mainstreaming of BDSM in some movies as well as the sexual openess and curiosity in American culture right now that people were more accepting of the BDSM lifestuyle but when I expressed the slighest bit of sympothy for Mcdowell to a coworker she became disguusted and said that anny sick frek that would respond to an add by a woman asking to be raped was a sick freak and belonged in jail. *Sigh* guess its only okay to tie up pookie with ur neck tie still but only on weekend nights when the moon is full if all the curtains are closed and all the doors double bolted.

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Sorry to come in so late.

I have to say I agree with you, I would also have a bit of sympathy for Mcd. Even if he should obviously have checked his facts as everybody points out, he wasn't out to do anybody any harm - in fact, quite the opposite.

The vanilla co workers responce however repugnant is all too often the norm. It doesnt surprise me. Bdsm may be more mainstreamed now than ever before, but I am sure its got a long way to go before its fully accepted if ever.

As for the crime and its peurpetrators; I am biased admitabely so, this is my opinion only:

I have zero sympathy for eaither the men involved, both are equally guilty in my eyes the one tricking the other is no excuse for the one doing the act itself, which to commit the monster had to rule out all common sence.

If it were up to me they would both be raped in similar torturous fashion and then fully castrated with a dull knife before being put to death. She may live on, but she will carry her burden forever with her. The least society can do is give her just retribution.

Somthing thats all to many times lacking in our PC world.

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Originally Posted by denuseri

I have zero sympathy for eaither the men involved, both are equally guilty in my eyes the one tricking the other is no excuse for the one doing the act itself, which to commit the monster had to rule out all common sence.

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I have to agree with you, at least to some extent. The trickster boyfriend should be put away for a very long time. He deliberately plotted, planned and executed a rape by proxy, and should be punished just as if he had committed cold-blooded rape.

The rapist, on the other hand, while definitely guilty of rape, should also be charged with criminal stupidity. How stupid does one have to be to realize that the person you think you are chatting with, especially when talking about a potentially criminal act, may not actually be that person? We see many reports of similar actions taking place. I'm sure this wasn't the first time for something like this. While he was tricked into the act, I have no sympathy for him, and if placed on the jury would have no problem finding him guilty.

(All this, of course, assumes that the reports we've seen are accurate, and that the rape did, indeed, occur. Following the Duke lacrosse incident, and others, we have to be careful about learning who did what and to whom.)

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Originally Posted by fetishdj

As for not calling this BDSM... I can understand why it is a bad idea to link ourselves to this but the truth is the 'rapist' was someone who had a kink for rape which, while at the extreme end of BDSM, is still within the remit

What if you were equally fooled into believing that someone else wanted whatever kink you enjoyed?

What stops it from happening more often are the SSC and RACK rules and the fact that we take care to make sure of ourselves before proceeding. I think we need to take this as a cautionary tale and an example as to why we should be careful...

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Fetishdj, I can see what you’re talking about, but you’re talking as a member of the community, not as a member of the vanilla world. The two men were complete morons, both out of touch with reality, so he might have a kink for rape that does not make what he has done more acceptable. I have a kink about being whipped that I find both erotic and fearsome, and if a person told me there was a woman down the street that wanted to whip someone’s back. With no hesitation, I would tell him to go down there himself and help her out. This had nothing to do with BDSM it is straight forward rape and conspiracy to rape. I don’t think that anyone with only half the brain power of these two men, would be not fooled, but coaxed into carrying out such a heinous real life crime as rape. The thing that would stop most people from doing this; is their quality of morality and intelligence; and as for a cautionary tale and example, and I do know there was no malicious intent in that remark. I feel that it would be insulting for anyone to think that a member of the community would be duped in this way.

Regards ian2411

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Originally Posted by denuseri

If it were up to me they would both be raped in similar torturous fashion and then fully castrated with a dull knife before being put to death.

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You never by any chance have ancestors that worked in the Tower of London in the reign of Prince John? Just a thought.

REGARDS IAN 2411

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Originally Posted by ian 2411

snip I feel that it would be insulting for anyone to think that a member of the community would be duped in this way.

Regards ian2411

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Alas, 'members of this community' are no better and no worse than anybody else. In fact, that is shown by research, so it's official.

How many people hear what they yearn to hear? If you wanted something all your life, maybe you fall into the trap without thinking.

Honestly, if you get in touch with somebody is the first thought you have that it may be someone else from what they say who also happens to be planning a trap or a 3. person? What if you are a newbie?

Nothing can excuse his lack of checking his facts, but I'd stil say he raped out of a mistake and without intent, while the planner raped with intent.

If all the facts are as presented.

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Originally Posted by Thorne

I have to agree with you, at least to some extent. The trickster boyfriend should be put away for a very long time. He deliberately plotted, planned and executed a rape by proxy, and should be punished just as if he had committed cold-blooded rape.

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Yes, "Conspiracy" is stretching the letter of the law, but I'm glad they found some statute to charge him because he is clearly guilty. (With the usual caveats, i.e. assuming the facts are as presented.)

To get the BDSM elements out of the way, because they are legally irrelevant, suppose someone was contacted online saying "I want to set up a stunt, I want a complete stranger to come up to me and my mates in the street and shoot me with a dummy gun, you can pick up the gun here and find me here," and the gun wasn't a dummy and he shot the victim dead. While he might be let off Murder One, most people would agree that (a) he deserved a jail term for being irresponsible enough to lend himself to such a stunt without checking more carefully, and (b) the person who set it up was at least equally if not more guilty.

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The rapist, on the other hand, while definitely guilty of rape, should also be charged with criminal stupidity. How stupid does one have to be to realize that the person you think you are chatting with, especially when talking about a potentially criminal act, may not actually be that person? We see many reports of similar actions taking place. I'm sure this wasn't the first time for something like this. While he was tricked into the act, I have no sympathy for him, and if placed on the jury would have no problem finding him guilty.

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I have, on occasion, been contacted by people who sounded too good to be true, and I've usually gone along for the ride while bearing in mind that they probably were. (The one I really hoped would turn out real claimed to be a lesbian masochist who wanted to be tortured and raped by a man because it was the most horrible thing that could happen; it was a lovely idea, but when she didn't show I wasn't surprised.) If one of them had suggested I start by breaking in on them without any preliminary contact, I would have enjoyed discussing it as long as they wanted to keep the fantasy going: but no amount of lust and fantasies would make me crazy enough to do it.

I recall an even nastier case some years ago in the UK where a husband with some kind of sick urge for revenge brought a bunch of yobs back from the pub claiming that his wife wanted to act out a gang-rape fantasy, and don't worry if she was tied down and screamed, it was what she wanted. The rape convictions were an open and shut case, but their sentences were reduced (I forget how much) because the court accepted they were honestly misled by the husband, who bore the bulk of the guilt. But a lot of people argued at the time that they should have been more cautious.