Tantra, Shibari, and BDSM

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12-05-2004
mastercoyote

Tantra, Shibari, and BDSM

Hi all,

I'm currently 41 yrs old. My "history" has been off-and-on, with only two real partners before my current lover/slave, min lilla.

My first lover who took me beyond vanilla sex was an Okinawan woman I met while stationed there in my early twenties. She owned a coffeehouse that I frequented and was in her mid-forties. We continued our relationship for about two years.

Mariko's "style" was unlike anything I've encountered in the West. There was somewhat of a D/s flavor to our play, but the true focus was on using pain and other intense sensory stimulation to enhance the sexual experience. She introduced and trained me in Shibari, Tantric lovemaking, and stimulation of pressure points using Shiatsu techniques, as well as the more familiar Western BDSM practices.

Western BDSM, on the other hand, seems to have much more of a focus on psychological Dominance and submission roleplay. I'm not judging, mind you, just pointing out the difference in focus (and perhaps goals, as well). I'll confess, however, that this is why I've not spent much time BDSM community over the years, just jumping in and out of the pool as it suits me.

While min lilla is most definitely my slave, she chose me because, like her, I'm not much interested in playing out scenes of humiliation and objectification - what I call "dungeon play". Again, NOT JUDGING.

I sometimes think of her as my apprentice in wickedness; but an apprentice in the manner of the Medieval guilds: as long as she is under my tutelage, I have complete and utter control of her life. That said, it's also my obligation to ensure her health, well-being, and overall education and development.

Would anyone out there like to explore this topic? I'd also like to know if anyone else has incorporated Tantra and Shiatsu techniques in their BDSM play.

Looking forward to hearing from all of you!
12-05-2004
Chuckdom19

Pursue the topic?

Quote:

Originally Posted by mastercoyote

Hi all,

(snip)

Mariko's "style" was unlike anything I've encountered in the West. There was somewhat of a D/s flavor to our play, but the true focus was on using pain and other intense sensory stimulation to enhance the sexual experience. She introduced and trained me in Shibari, Tantric lovemaking, and stimulation of pressure points using Shiatsu techniques, as well as the more familiar Western BDSM practices.

(snip)

Would anyone out there like to explore this topic? I'd also like to know if anyone else has incorporated Tantra and Shiatsu techniques in their BDSM play.

Looking forward to hearing from all of you!

"Apprentice in wickedness"--- love the term, as will a few of our more mischievious lady subs around here. They will share it whole-heartedly. Yes.

I would be most interested in knowing more about this, and learning some of the techniques should you share them.

Good topic for everybody interested in growing skills.
:goodpost:
12-05-2004
EnglandCuteGirl

Hi sirs, I was wondering if the both of you would join me in the Sexual Fantasies?
12-05-2004
azure_eyes

i have heard of such, but have yet to learn about them... could you provide more information about it Sir? i would love to share them with my own Sir!!

azzie
12-05-2004
mastercoyote

Quote:

Originally Posted by chksng19

"Apprentice in wickedness"--- love the term,

Lol, I was rather proud of that one!

Quote:

Originally Posted by chksng19

I would be most interested in knowing more about this, and learning some of the techniques should you share them.

Tantra is a form of spiritual meditation that began in India, I believe, using lovemaking techniques to achieve enlightenment. Good times! It's most well-known aspect is in the withholding of orgasm to enhance the experience. The famous Kama Sutra positions are also used.

I personally have gone for up to six hours without coming OR losing my erection (sometimes going to half-mast). Every fibre of your being becomes one great big erogenous zone at that point, similar to what is felt in Dom- and sub-space.

Being a "soft" form of lovemaking, Tantric might at first seem to be the polar opposite of BDSM. However, the techniques do lend themselves very well to Shibari and BDSM play.

Shiatsu massage uses some of the same pressure points found in acupuncture. Often a Shiatsu artisan will apply focused pressure that causes temporary pain, followed immediately by a dramatic relaxation of the muscle group being worked on. Again, useful stuff to know.

There's tons of stuff on the web if you'd like to know more.
12-05-2004
Chuckdom19

Love to know more

Quote:

Originally Posted by mastercoyote

Tantra is a form of spiritual meditation that began in India, I believe, using lovemaking techniques to achieve enlightenment. Good times! It's most well-known aspect is in the withholding of orgasm to enhance the experience. The famous Kama Sutra positions are also used.

I personally have gone for up to six hours without coming OR losing my erection (sometimes going to half-mast). Every fibre of your being becomes one great big erogenous zone at that point, similar to what is felt in Dom- and sub-space.

Being a "soft" form of lovemaking, Tantric might at first seem to be the polar opposite of BDSM. However, the techniques do lend themselves very well to Shibari and BDSM play.

Shiatsu massage uses some of the same pressure points found in acupuncture. Often a Shiatsu artisan will apply focused pressure that causes temporary pain, followed immediately by a dramatic relaxation of the muscle group being worked on. Again, useful stuff to know.

There's tons of stuff on the web if you'd like to know more.

I'd love a list, if you have one handy, of the good ones. On every subject that has to do with Human Sexuality on google or wherever, I find 100 crap sites for every worthwhile one.

Chksng
12-05-2004
mastercoyote

Quote:

Originally Posted by chksng19

I'd love a list, if you have one handy, of the good ones. On every subject that has to do with Human Sexuality on google or wherever, I find 100 crap sites for every worthwhile one.

Chksng

I was going to tell you to have your slave do the research, but that would be TOO cruel :P

Here's a list with some useful info and history, but like yoga or any other philosophy, you'll find the best info in book form. If you get truly involved in it, you might consider hiring a trainer, aka a "Tantric Goddess".

It's more fun than algebra, tho.

HERE-NOW4U C. Geerdes THE KAMASUTRA of VATSYAYANA
History of Sex Ancient India
Kama Sutra - Love teachings of the Kama Sutra.
Kama Sutra Online from Tantra At Tahoe
My Dakini Yoga of Ecstasy
Tantra Kama Sutra Tantric Sex
Tantra Magazine.
Tantric philosophy explained
Teaching Tantra, sexual enlightenment, multiple orgasm
The Sex Project The Kama Sutra 1
12-08-2004
Kalluss

I've been doing a blend of shibari and tantra for years.

I've always considered it to be a "slow burn" kind of loving as opposed to the "flash" of BDSM.

The blend to me is a way of keeping pleasure alive for a very long time. While I have not personally hit the six hour mark, I have made it well beyond three. I know my dorei loves those sessions where the shibari is in a kind of free flow zen space while we're both at that plateau before the final orgasm.

Just to clarify... I'm calling BDSM sex more of a flash, because in the way I've done it over the years, it seems more like I'm ripping orgasms from my girl, rather than letting her simmer for a good long time.

Of course, you have to know your ropes, and both your bodies well to do it.
12-09-2004
mastercoyote

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kalluss

While I have not personally hit the six hour mark, I have made it well beyond three.

Well, all bragging aside, I'll typically cum after 2-4 hours or not at all. The few times I came after 5-6 hours were sometimes a bit uncomfortable. Usually after that much time I'll just save it for later, which makes my balls ache pleasantly all the next day :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kalluss

I know my dorei loves those sessions where the shibari is in a kind of free flow zen space while we're both at that plateau before the final orgasm.

Exactly. It sounds like you've had more experience with blending Shibari/BDSM with Tantra than I have. I've had plenty of experience with both, but mixing them together has been a relatively new and interesting experiment.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kalluss

Just to clarify... I'm calling BDSM sex more of a flash, because in the way I've done it over the years, it seems more like I'm ripping orgasms from my girl, rather than letting her simmer for a good long time.

Yup. Sometimes a good old fashioned against-the-wall fucking seconds after she's closed the front door is great too!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kalluss

Of course, you have to know your ropes, and both your bodies well to do it.

I used "philosophy" incorrectly in my previous post. I should have said "discipline" (no pun intended). Like yoga, karate, tai-chi, etc.; Shibari and Tantra takes a bit of practice and study to do it well. Which also applies to BDSM, of course.

What I've become interested in lately is applying physical pain and psychological stressors, to both me and my slave, to induce a highly charged state that lasts for 4-6 hours--something akin to an LSD trip, but using the body's own chemicals.

Any thoughts on that?
12-14-2004
Kalluss

Quote:

Originally Posted by mastercoyote

What I've become interested in lately is applying physical pain and psychological stressors, to both me and my slave, to induce a highly charged state that lasts for 4-6 hours--something akin to an LSD trip, but using the body's own chemicals.

Any thoughts on that?

I'm not sure how you would work it with both of you. I'm sure that a liberal application of many different methods can induce what you're talking about. It's that subspace thing that some experience, the flying, loss of sense of self.

I don't think I'd want both of us under those kinds of stresses while in a shibari or BDSM scene. Someone has to be 'present' enough to know what's going on and to keep things safe.
12-14-2004
mastercoyote

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kalluss

I'm not sure how you would work it with both of you. I'm sure that a liberal application of many different methods can induce what you're talking about. It's that subspace thing that some experience, the flying, loss of sense of self.

I don't think I'd want both of us under those kinds of stresses while in a shibari or BDSM scene. Someone has to be 'present' enough to know what's going on and to keep things safe.

That's what the trained monkeys are for! Lol, I should have been more specific in that I wouldn't experiment on both of us at the same time.

Back to what I'd like to explore. I remember once reading an interview with '60's LSD guru Aldous Huxley. (At least I think it was him. Definately not Leary.). He stated that if he'd known that he could accomplish better altered states through meditation, he would have never promoted drugs.

It's well known that monks and other people expert in meditation are able to exact an extraordinary level of control over the so-called involuntary body functions. Since Shibari is itself a form of meditation and Indian gurus are able to control their pain threshold, I think BDSM play is ripe for, um... "study".

Any thoughts out there?