I've noticed several threads on infidelity lately -- and historically. So I thought I'd post a rather lengthy bit of my thoughts on the subject, including my own story which should explain why I feel the way I do.

As a warning, I have strong opinions on the subject and those opinions are that it's wrong. Dead wrong and, frankly, an evil, because it involves hurting someone who trusts you not to hurt them.

That being the case, I judge those who commit the act accordingly -- on the evil-meter, I place it somewhere near an emotionally or mentally abusive spouse. If you're being unfaithful and don't like that characterization, I really don't care -- much as I don't care what an emotionally-abusive husband thinks.

To avoid confusion, I define infidelity as knowingly doing something which your partner would consider unfaithful and hasn't agreed to.

If you're in a poly or open relationship, my comments don't apply to you, because you and your partner(s) have consented.

If you do something you honestly feel your partner wouldn't have a problem with and then find out they do, I don't consider that infidelity -- unless you keep doing it knowing they consider it being unfaithful and haven't consented.

If you have an agreement with your partner because of some situation and they don't really like the idea but have consented -- that I don't feel is infidelity.

The bottom-line is knowledge and consent.