willing and needing to better please her Master

[l<itten]

I am a very, very willing Sub wanting to please my Master better in anyway possible. I want him to have his way with me in any way or time he wants. We have tried anal once, but I got uncomfortable and used our safe word. I don't really feel alot of pain, maybe just mild pain, but it makes me more uncomfortable than anything. Like I said, I want him to have his way with me, anyone have suggestions on what we could do to make it easier for he both of us. The BDSM scene is very new to us (3 months new). This is his first D/s relationship and mine as well, and I was a virgin up until about a month ago, my Master had his way with me as we both wanted then. He loves me and respects his l<itten as he should and doesnt want to scare me away from any of this, but wants to be the role he claims to be, "My Master". Also I am also very willing to give head and do often (almost everyday), but I have a major problem with gag reflex, and I want him to be able to lie me on the bed with my head over the edge and fuck my throat...Any Doms or Subs have suggestions on how you work with your Sub or Dom on that? Any advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

[slavelucy]

Hey there l<itten,

Crikey, that's a whole lot of questions you askthere! *smiles*

Ok..firstly, you haven't been in a Ds relationship very long, and it sounds to me like you just need to carry on as you are, along with your Master, taking it as it comes and exploring stuff together. In addition, it isn't so long ago that you lost your virginity, so all things considered, i'd say you were doing quite a lot, quite quickly! Your Master sounds like he'd be more than willing to take it at a steady pace, both sexually and in relation to Ds, so that's good. i also wouldn't worry too much about not pleasing him unless he states that you're not pleasing him.

In terms of the two pratical sexual issues you mentioned (anal and oral sex), i tracked down some good threads about these two things for you (the first one, for your purposes, starts at the second post):

Anal Sex

How to give the best blow job

Hope these are helpful to you, and have fun!

sl

[Mobius]

You are so young. And frankly new to sex in general. I think you need to learn what pleases you then learn what pleases your master.

DS is a 2 way street.

Learn what pleases you and what your limits are. Anal sex may be a hard limit for you or it may be a soft limit that can be expanded over time.

Do not feel you have to do some thing just so it pleases your master/boyfreind.

Take your tiime and explore your self with your master.

Now play nice or I will have Lord Mobius abduct you and give you a time out in his dungeon.

[Lord Douche]

Hi Kitten!

I think Mobius has it right. You're new to all of this. Take your time, start slowly and enjoy things as they develop

Thread moved to Knowledge Base. Lucy will be along soon to merge the two posts. Here seems more appropriate for it than General Talk

LD

[e.b.]

l<itten,

I agree with sl, LD, and Mobius here (wow, so much agreement...something must be in the water).

But really, taking your time and making sure you know what you want for yourself is important. I know we all mature at different speeds and am respectful of the fact that you may already know that you're happiest when serving. I just don't want you to sacrifice your own interests in an attempt to please your master. Remember that negotiation is important at the beginning of any relationship but it's especially necessary for D/s.

Also, please don't feel bad about using your safe word or feeling as if you need time in order to be able to give your dom more trust. It's normal for trust to develop over time. I'd be worried if you did trust him to do anything after having only been in the relationship for a relatively short amount of time. It sounds like you both respect each other so just stay open, take it slow, communicate, and have fun. I think you'll do just fine. Remember also that we should never stop learning, no matter how old we get or how long we've been with a significant other, that's part of the fun!

The threads lucy found are both good for more practical info. Enjoying anal is somewhat of an acquired taste. Take it slow...get to enjoy a couple fingers in your ass, then maybe a small to medium butt plug, and work up to anal sex with your dom if that's still what you both want. Again, have fun!

Also, you should be commended for posting. That takes guts but I'm glad you did it as the members here are wonderful resources.

eb

[BabySub]

I read this post and replies last night, but never had time to reply due to having to get some sleep

Thank you for bringing this subject up l<itten, it's something I've been thinking about for a while now. This thead, and the other two mentioned (thank you sl) have helped lots. I don't particularly want a lot of pain, mild pain I might be able to handle. I do, however, want to be able to offer all parts of me to my Dom, which include my ass. I've already spoken to him about it, and he said that if we did have anal, it would be entirely in my control. I'd say what happened, how fast, and if indeed to stop at any point. He understands it would be a huge move for me to do that, and is very willing to take it slowly.

I've already experimented slightly, by inserting a finger to almost the 2nd knuckle, and it was pain free. Sometime soon (when I can be alone) I want to try again and perhaps use two and see what happens. (it can be kinda hard to reach round there though, lol) I've found that if I push down while pushing my finger in, and keep pushing my finger when I stop with my body can allow me to go that little bit further, but I guess everyone is individual? (and if you understood that, then you're a better person that I, LOL)

Anyway, l<itten, sorry for hijacking this thread, I just wanted to reply to something that interested me and inspired me to.

[Eraser]

Well I'm gonna add my 2 cents to the "I agree with..."

There all correct |<itten, don't rush this. You both have alot learning and alot of exploring to do learn to walk before you try a marathon. You at some point hear a lot about "training" at some point if you haven't already. Training isn't just physical and its not just rules of call me this and kneel this way. Its also a progressive state of mind and a growth. Getting started this soon into your D\s relationship after discovering your sexuality is in same way good and some way bad. You still have alot to learn and explore don't rush things and learn to progress rather then charge ahead blindly.

[Chuckdom19]

It seems fresh to hear of someone so deeply in love, wishing to improve the experience. So many get complacent.

Whatever you work at, do it gradually! In spite of nearly every erotic writer, throat fucking takes A Long Time to adjust to. Work on the gagging with a soft, smaller dildo; increase length and size as time goes on. You can do this doing anything else at the time; cooking, watching TV, doing paperwork, whatever.

Keep on caring, sharing, and communicating. The more you discuss things, the deeper your love can grow. I'm very glad for you!

[l<itten]

I totally agree that I am young (18 yrs young to be exact).Eb I also think everyone matures at a different pace, now I wouldn't say I have totally matured, but I know what I like and what I don't. I know what pleases me. My Master and I trust each other, which is very important. We have sat down and both filled out the BDSM checklist,so that we can both be on the same page about what each one of us would like to or not like to do(I am sure everyone here is familiar with the list). There are some things that I don't really like, but are willing to do for my Master if he asks for it, and I am allowed to use our safe word at anytime I no longer feel comfortable. My Master and I have tried anal again since my post on October 21st, and I did as I had done the first time we tried it: squirmed away from him as he was trying to get his cock or even his fingers anywhere near my ass, I have a very,very LOW tolerance for pain, but love my Master and desire to please him. Oh, and slavelucy about whether my Master says I am not pleasing him, no, he has't any complaints, but with him being my Master only wants to use every part of my body(mouth,pussy etc).I don't feel like with me so recently losing my virginity I am doing alot very quickly, I was doing only oral sex before I met my Master, I am a very, very sexual sub. You know Mobius, maybe you are right anal may be a hard limit for me, and the last time we did try anal my Master said that he wouldn't mind if we never did it again, He said he doesn't want to do something to me that is going to cause me so much pain, he wants it to be pleasurable for both of us. Everyone's comments,suggestions, and advice have been most helpful, and greatly appreciated. Thanks alot.