Taking the First Steps

[Mairead]

*bounces with excitement*

As some of you may know, despite how I talk and think dirty, irl I’m torn between being intensely curious and kind of intimidated. I’ve had very little experience irl and lately a good friend has been walking me through the first few steps of submission with some very memorable phone conversations.

I recently moved, and while packing up I found a clothespin. Which is odd cause I don’t have any other clothespins, so I just have to assume that somehow it was my ex-roomie’s. So I’ve had this clothespin sitting around…..and I was torn between wanting to experiment with it and being too chicken to actually do anything.

This good friend was dared to do something very uncomfortable in chat, and in an effort to distract her, I mentioned the clothespin. I think it worked because not too long after I was tying a vibe onto my leg and tying my legs together….and then putting the clothespin on my nipple. I have been told I squeaked when it went on.

Now here’s the part I found interesting: it hurt, and I’m not sure if it was pleasant (having a magic wand on me just makes me happy regardless of anything else), but I wasn’t tempted to take it off. It was more of “when’s she going to let me take it off”. It’s something I think I’ll be experimenting with again in the future. There are two aspects of the experience that kind of give me butterflies, and that’s the fact that I think I enjoyed the clothespin and the fact that I was feeling submissive enough to not consider taking the painful clothespin off until told to. Being that submissive is something that is very new to me.

It was a very intense session, and I know I enjoyed it. And I just figured that I’d share my thoughts. I'm still trying to learn, so if you have stories and/or advice about taking the first steps in the lifestyle please feel free to share any comments!

[denuseri]

huggels ya boo and happy first steps

[jeanne]

Congratulations - it's always fun to hear about first experiences with submission. It's shocking how that desire to please just takes over isn't it?



Good for you, enjoy yourself, and keep us posted!

[Mairead]

*waves to everybody*

I’ve got another update! After the events in the first one, I was instructed to go out and buy more clothespins. I had gone to a few stores, but had found some yesterday. Of course I made the mistake of actually buying them over my lunch hour. For the rest of the day, I was squirming and distracted and tingly in my nether regions.

After the fun times with the first clothespin, the Domme and I talked and she mentioned that she is pretty convinced I am a masochist. For some reason, I didn’t want to admit to it, and kept protesting “but how can we know until I really experience more”. Yet, when I picked up the package of clothespins in the store, my reaction was “Oh this is going to hurt” and promptly went to pay for them. At no point, did I consider not buying them or after finding them putting the package down and fibbing that I couldn’t find any. Well, after spending a few hours at work squirming in my chair and my reaction to picking up the package, I started to realize I should probably stop protesting.

And so last night I found myself on my bed, on the phone and webcam with her. I was wound up and nervous, cause I thought that it was going to hurt as much as it did the other night, with the single clothespin on my nipple. Of course she settled me down and went slowly until I eventually had what seemed to be a forest of clothespins on my inner thighs, one on each of my nipples and another one beside each of the nipple clothespins. I wasn’t expecting them to move and wiggle with each of my movements (like all of my giggling, which seems to be my reaction to new things). It didn’t hurt nearly as much as I thought it would, and I was really really wet. And I came hard when I was allowed to. For me, clitoral orgasms are harder to have really good ones than g-spot ones. But this time, it was a big one and I squirted a lot (which doesn’t usually happen from clitoral orgasms). So once I could think again, I realized two things: a) I think I like the pain of clothespins and b) oh damn the nipple ones are hurting even more now. *giggles*

lol and after that, she and I had a talk where I admitted I may be a masochist….and she started to wonder if I’m a painslut! She’s reserving judgement on that until we go through some more tests, which I’m trying not to guess what they may be. I know I’ll find out and probably sooner rather than later.

One thing I did want to ask the crowd out there: is there a trick to putting clothespins on oneself? I kept trying to, but they kept popping off. Was I just being chicken about putting them on myself, or is there a magic ratio of how much skin to grab to get them to stay on? As much fun as giggling together about the clothespin malfunctions was, I’d like to be able to be able to put them on easier, because I think the humour of that only has a limited lifetime.

Thanks for reading!

[leah06]

*waves to everybody*

So once I could think again, I realized two things: a) I think I like the pain of clothespins...

I like how conservative you are here. "I have tried clothespins and liked them, therefore I can conclude that I like the pain of clothespins. Not having tried other forms of pain I must remain agnostic about those. Until I experience each one, of course." LOL.

[Ozme52]

Magic Ratio LOL

[cherryatom]

I just started trying out vrl pain things too. My first task involved clothes pins too. I use them for laundry. I wish I had your problem with them popping off. What I would recommend is maybe putting athletic tape on the tips. I tried this because my had little teeth (lord knows why) but when I put them on my breasts they break the skin. So I had a task which involved attaching the clothes pins to a string and pulling all ten off at the same time. Well with the athletic tape on the ends they WOULD NOT COME OFF. They were glued to my body even after I unhinged them they still stuck to my skin. It was like ripping off a bandaid for each one. I don't know if you want to level up so quickly but that's an easy at home quick fix to keep the clothes pins on.

I hoped that helps. I also had a related question of my own. Like I said I"m knew to this and after a particularly rough session where I might have been punished I feel an intense desire to cuddle. It feels oddly inappropriate though. Does anyone else have this feeling or know why someone would want to cuddle after being punished?

[moco]

[QUOTE=
I hoped that helps. I also had a related question of my own. Like I said I"m knew to this and after a particularly rough session where I might have been punished I feel an intense desire to cuddle. It feels oddly inappropriate though. Does anyone else have this feeling or know why someone would want to cuddle after being punished?[/QUOTE]

wow this is something that I have read about. But it is a somewhat common occurrence with subs. It is called "sub drop" there is an article about it that might be helpful for you:

here is part of an article from another site

D/s is all encompassing in the sense that its not just about scenes, and highs, and fun, and pain, and control, and all the exciting things we do. Its about real people, and their needs, and wants. The intense activities that are part of a D/s or BDSM relationship do sometimes have their downsides as well. This article will deal with one of those downsides. Sub Drop.

After all the emotional highs of the elevation of a submissive into subspace, the return to normality can have a profound effect on both Dominant and submissive. Each in their own way has reached a level rarely achieved in daily life, and which, very often, neither is prepared for.

Sub drop; the coming down, the return to normality, can happen quickly, or slowly. It can be a nice experience, or a bad one. And the effects, good or bad, can last almost no time at all, or they can go on for hours, even days

if you want to read the whole article it can be found either by googling "sub drop" or by going to seekers.org.uk/sub drop.htm

I hope this helps

[Mairead]

Like I said I"m knew to this and after a particularly rough session where I might have been punished I feel an intense desire to cuddle. It feels oddly inappropriate though. Does anyone else have this feeling or know why someone would want to cuddle after being punished?

Thanks for the reply. I haven't played since my last post, but I'll keep your suggestions in mind!

And as for your question, I think after I was punished, I'd need to be cuddled and comforted and reassured that I've been forgiven and the dominant and I are good again. I think I'd need to be shown that I'm still cared for. I haven't actually experienced this, but I really think that's how I'd react.

Hope it helps!

[Mairead]

I got to have another scene last night. *grins* I was told to get clothespins and toothpaste. Before last night, I had not used toothpaste other than on my teeth. I have seen the reactions that people have in Truth or Dare when toothpaste is mentioned, so I was pretty nervous. It didn’t help that the Dominant was enjoying my nervousness and was trying to make me squirm. It’s still amazing to me that someone can influence my emotions and behaviour to such an extent. I was completely flustered, just by her smirk. I wonder if that is a feeling that I will ever get used to.

I’m still enjoying the clothespins! This time I was instructed to put the forest of clothespins all over my inner and outer labia. It was a weird feeling, uncomfortable but not that bad really.

After the clothespins came off, it was time for the toothpaste. Since I was using it on myself, I was using dabs of it, but I actually really liked the tingly sensation. At one point, I was squirming a bit, but it never got to the point of being uncomfortable. Even when I was told to put a finger inside myself, and I (unthinkingly) used the finger that had been applying the toothpaste. Maybe my reactions would change if I used more toothpaste, globs instead of dabs, but as it was the toothpaste was great!

And between the clothespins and the toothpaste, I came hard, twice. And once again, I don’t usually come that easily from just clitoral stimulation. But I was almost cumming as soon as I turned the vibe on. At this point, the Dominant declared that I’m a “pain slut in training”. And at this point I can’t argue. The pain definitely worked to build up an orgasm without any other stimulation. But there are still so many sensations that I haven’t experienced yet, we both like the idea of me being “in training”.

I have been hesitant to actually admit that I have these tendencies. I think it is because until very recently, I’ve always thought of submission and the pain/pleasure mix as abstracts. Without a way to actually try them out (and without a Dominant telling me to try), they were concepts that had no bearing on how I saw myself. But now, they’re becoming real and I can’t really deny the feelings it brings out in me. It has changed the way I view my kink, finally getting a chance to figure out what I actually like.

Oh, and during the scene, I had also been instructed to tie myself up with rope (well, except for my hands). I thought you might enjoy a visual of the rope marks! (I'm glad I took those pictures last night....the marks have already faded.)

Thanks for reading!

[jeanne]

It didn’t help that the Dominant was enjoying my nervousness and was trying to make me squirm. It’s still amazing to me that someone can influence my emotions and behaviour to such an extent. I wonder if that is a feeling that I will ever get used to.

I haven't. Thank goodness!

Thanks for sharing your experiences with us, Mairead - I can't wait to see the pictures when they are approved.

[jackod]

Vow congratulation,where is YOUR fantastic Lady trainer located? sincerely,jack

[Mairead]

Vow congratulation,where is YOUR fantastic Lady trainer located? sincerely,jack

Thanks Jack,

I passed on your compliment to her, but I'll let her identify herself and/or contact you if she chooses.

*smiles*

Oh, and thanks for the compliment Oz, but during my hands were too busy and my mind too preoccupied to be taking pictures!

[Ozme52]

Nice after pics mairead.

Before and during are always appreciated.
I always enjoy seeing others' work.

[FrozenGrapes]

I have been fortunate enough to be able to help Mairead through a few steps in learning her likes and dislikes. I did not expect her to enjoy the clothespins and toothpaste as much as she did.. but like she said.. I dont think she used that much. More tests are to cum as I am sure she will as well..... I look forward to her further posts.. and certainly look forward to more pics....

[toyamanda]

Thanks for sharing, Mairead. I am new to this also and am having many of the same reactions. I just bought a bag of clothespins about an hour ago, actually. A very talkative woman in the laundry aisle engaged me in a discussion about how much better it is to line-dry your clothes instead of using the dryer. I had an awfully hard time not giggling, and I'm sure I turned beet red...

There are 50 in the bag, which makes me a little nervous. I'm not really sure I'm ready for the other 48.

I had a nice time this morning with some Good Grips bag clips--you know, the kind you use to keep chips fresh, that you find on the gadget wall at Bed Bath and Beyond (oh, my...I just had a thought about creative uses for other things you find on the gadget wall at Bed Bath and Beyond). They come in a four pack, each one is a different bright color.

Anyway, the inside of the clippy part is rubberized, which makes for nice, firm contact with the skin, without breaking it. They're pretty wide, so the whole nipple is inside, even when it's smooshed out.

Although I did not take advantage of this feature, there's also a loop in the end, so a string or chain could be attached.

Ha! Listen to me, giving somebody a tip like I have any idea what I'm talking about....

Also, I like your avatar, Mairead. That soy sauce is going nowhere!