Slut4U writting assignment

[Slut4U]

I stir in my bed, on the 5th floor of a 12 story apartment building, with the smell of smoke hanging heavily in the air. It takes a few seconds for my very groggy brain to realize what it is that I smell. When I do I jump out of bed, rush to get my jeans on and get out of my apartment building. As soon as I open the door the smoke filled hall makes me gag and gasp for break. My neighbor Alex pushes me to the floor and tells me to stay low. We crawl to the end of the smoke filled all trying to make it to the window.
We open the window to try to get some fresh air, but it’s to hot for us to touch. We can see the flames shooting fiercely out from windows below us. We can’t tell where the fire is and if it is above us also. I reach into my pocket for my cell phone; I realize I left it on the charger next to my bed. I try to crawl back to my apartment to retrieve it but Alex grabs the back of my shirt and pulls me back. In between gasps for breath he says, “There isn’t enough time, we have to get out of here. We can’t go down. Our only hope is the roof.”
As we head over to the fire exit steps, feeling our way to the door because the smoke burns our eyes so bad, the smoke gets so heavy it becomes hard to breath. We know if we stay our time is limited. When we open the fire exit door to the steps a rush of smoke comes full force at us, before we can even catch our breath I Jennifer and Alisa coming from the steps below. “We have to go up and fast. The fire is growing quickly.”
Alex leads us to the steps, “We have to make to the roof if we are going to survive.” It’s difficult to climb the steps as gasping for breath, and not being able to see. We finally feel our way to the roof, but its locked. Alex. The 4 of us rush at the door at full speed. It pops open, the cold outside air greats us…..

[Aesop]

Not bad Slut. Your descriptions were pretty good, although I would have liked some more of the senses portrayed. And here:

As soon as I open the door the smoke filled hall makes me gag and gasp for break. My neighbor Alex pushes me to the floor and tells me to stay low. We crawl to the end of the smoke filled all trying to make it to the window.

Smoke filled hall is a good description once, but I think it's a bit of an overkill to have the same phrase twice that close together. Next time maybe you could try to find a different descriptive phrase if you want to talk about the same thing that close together.

I think you did a fine job and I'll be sending you your next assignment soon. I do get busy, so if it doesn't show up in a couple of days be patient, it'll get there.

[Slut4U]

thanks fine Sir. I am sorry but I was alittle rushed to get it down because I forgot about it. Plus I am not that good at writing things that are kinky or that I dont come up with. If thats understandable.
Slut4U

[submissivewife]

thanks fine Sir. I am sorry but I was alittle rushed to get it down because I forgot about it. Plus I am not that good at writing things that are kinky or that I dont come up with. If thats understandable.
Slut4U

You know, I am the opposite...I do much better if I have a topic. But everyone has the way of writing. Hope you continue to enjoy.