Gregsta,
In a good way, I hope.
* cheeky grin *
Rabbit advised and I agree, take your time on this next assignment. Read through some of the articles, print out your short story and get out the editing pen. A glass of your favorite beverage and some food may also help.
I prefer to print, mark up, leave it for a few days and then read it again to see if I liked my own suggested changes.
If yes, then I'll type them in, print, and leave it alone for at least another day.
Each time you come at something fresh, you can say, "Whoa - what was I thinking? or Yes! That's it!"
But if you keep looking at the same thing over and over again without a break, most of us get to the point where we start to read what isn't there.
So consider this assignment a multipart one.
1. Read the article about active versus passive voice.
2. Make some edits on paper.
3. Read an article on pacing.
4. Make some more edits.
... and so on, until you feel your ready to show the next version to us.
Since this is your first big attempt at tackling all these items in the same story - that is knowingly tackle them - give yourself some breathing room. We aren't on a deadline.
If you edit on the computer, I recommend saving your files under different version names so you can see the progressions and changes.
I'm looking forward to seeing the results of all your hard work,
Ruby