shadow's second assignment

[Shadow]

we'll just call this one

THE BET...........


The chair slammed into the wall. He had kicked it hard and now stood staring at the TV screen.
How could he have lost?, he ran the question threw his mind , over and over.
It was a sure thing, eazy win and he had bet large.
His team was up by three and had the ball with just seconds to go, they fumbled and the other team
grabbed it and scored.

He could'nt move, he just stood there staring at the now blank screen.
He was in trouble, he had bet more then he could afford to lose and they would be coming for their
money.He did'nt know what to do, he wanted to run, to just pack a bag and go.
He knew if he ran they would find him, hunt him down and hurt or kill him.
He sat for a long time just staring off into space, the tears rolling down his cheeks.
The knock came like gun shots, filling his head with thunder. He jumped and his heart skipped a beat
and slamed into overdrive, trying to beat it's way out of his chest.
He slowly walked to the door, as if it was his last walk, like a condemned man heading to the gallows.
Opening the door he peered out, wishing it was a mistake, someone knocking at the wrong door.

The two men pushed their way into the room, filling the entryway with their bulk.
He had to look up to see their faces, hard men with no compassion in their eyes.
We are here to collect was all the man said, and held out his hand.
He started shaking, his biggest fear realized. He was going to die, or worse, live thru the beating.
"I can't pay" was all he said with his head down and eyes closed, he waited for the blow, to feel his head
explode with the coming punches. The wait was worse then the beating he thought, why don't they just hit
me and get it over with.

Slowly he opened his eyes and raised his head, looking into the faces of his would be tormentors.
He was shocked, stunned at what he saw. The men were smiling, looking at him with glee on their
faces. The blow came sudden and without warning, then nothing, only darkness and a deep sleep.

When he awoke he was sitting in a chair, his head felt like someone had parked a truck on it.
He raised his hand and felt the knot at the back of his head, slowly looking at his hand checking for blood,
not seeing any was a good sign, but his head was still felt like it was splitting in two.
His eyes had trouble focusing, the light made his brain want to curl into a ball and cry.

Then he saw her, leaning against the desk in front of him. She was beautiful, with dark hair and stunningly dark eyes.
She was a large woman, but not over weight, her body well proportioned to her size.
Her body was wonderful, with large breasts and a thinning waist line that lead to her curving hips.
The dress she wore highlighted her beauty, like a light softly shinning on the portrait of a goddess.
She smiled at him and said " My name is Big D, and you seem to owe me some money.".
He looked at her smiling at him and wanted to kiss her lips, wanted to taste her, to get lost
forever in her beautiful dark eyes.

" I can't pay you" he stammered, his voice cracking. He was fearful of her, she held his life in her pale hand
and could crush him with a single word to the men behind him. But he found himself thinking more of her then
of his own survival, her beauty and grace making it hard to think about anything else. She was a goddess
come to life, and he no longer cared about himself, wanting only to look at her, to smell the scent of her perfume.
He was lost to everything other then her, no light or sound could tear him away from her eyes.

He heard the words come from his mouth, blurting out, almost as if he did not have control of what he was saying
" you can have everything I own, every possession I have is yours, please, anything you ask, anything you want,
I willingly give to you".

She looked down at him, her smile was one of affection and his heart melted, wanting to look at that smile forever.
"anything?" she asked, her eyes looking deep into his. He was lost, he had made a bet and lost, it was time to pay.
He lowered his head, closed his eyes and whispered in a voice so small he could bearly hear it himself.
"Yes, anything you ask, now and forever" and he began to cry, he wanted only to please her, to be hers forever.
Doing anything she asked, no matter what it was, he would gladly do it.

Lovingly she put her hand under his chin and raised his head, she leaned in and softly kissed his lips.
Whispering in his ear she said " kneel for me, my pet".

[SheepishJaina]

mmmm delicious... so.. what happens next?

[Rabbit1]

Very nice ---you did leave out some important things ----smell ---and taste---after a beating did you taste the coppery of blood in your mouth ----and if you did not recieve a beating ---did you have a cotton taste in your mouth from a drug ---how did the room smell ---did the woman have on perfume---

the trick is to use all of your decriptive powers to make the reader feel and see what you feel ---see --taste --smell ==hear.

[cariad]

Shadow, I loved the tension, the variation in pace and the change in emotions, not to mention the surprise ending.

cariad

[Talia]

Very nicely done....and the ending was a twist. Rabbit gave great advice. I'll be PMing Rabbit and send you on to level two....good luck.

SB

[Shadow]

thank you all for your wonderful posts.....first and second assignment.....
with inspiration like that I feel I can do even better.....
and thank you Super Bitch....(sneaks a apple onto her desk and hurries to the door, not wanting to be seen)......


shadow

[Talia]

*looks the apple on my desk* Your welcome shadow....good luck in level two
*takes a bit of the apple* mmmmmm love apples.